Q4ALL- What have you tried in a sexual context that you would never do again?

LalaTheSecond · 2021-11-06T03:04:05+00:00

Instant no is anything degrading or painful a guy want to do to me for their enjoyment. Never done it though. Same with gross things that should never happen outside a bathroom. (Neither have been requested so it is hypothetical.)

Other stuff if it's a neutral feeling then I'll try it.

cccccclairee · 2021-11-06T03:55:59+00:00

No to choking and probably no to most degradation. It’s weird to fault someone for being open and adventurous enough to try something and find out they don’t like it.

NarniaFox · 2021-11-06T04:38:35+00:00

Sex in public places. When we were teens we didn't have our own place, so we fooled around in various settings sometimes had full intercourse. Now I'm rather embarrassed about it, but at least I did it with my husband and neither of us has the desire to explore it any further, we've had enough.

Chocking makes me panic, so it's a hard no for me. And...that's all I guess. My husband and I both aren't into heavy BDSM stuff, so a lot of things that I don't want to try we've never tried in the first place and lots of what we did try we still practice from time to time.

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-11-06T03:20:10+00:00

I don’t think there’s anything I did in the past I haven’t done with my current partner. But there are things I never tried until him or never enjoyed with past partners. Sometimes the connection with the person you’re doing it with is way more important than the act itself. I think that’s enough to say for a public comment.

So the whole “she did things with chad in college she won’t do with you now because you’re a beta” just isn’t something I can relate to. But really, just because someone tried something in the past and didn’t care for it does not mean they have to do it again with a new partner to somehow prove their love. That thinking is quite twisted.

philomexa · 2021-11-06T03:04:17+00:00

Anything that leans into violence, pain, or degradation. Sex should be relaxing and fun, not a psychodrama to work through feelings of powerlessness, misandry, misogyny, self hate, and trauma.

No I will not spit on you, and no you cannot choke me.

Also, I'm never having shower sex again. It's just a waste of everybody's time with a high risk of concussions.

YveisGrey · 2021-11-06T12:48:18+00:00

Anal never done it and I have no desire to try it

Fudstersecured · 2021-11-06T03:52:26+00:00

Unprotected sex with anyone I wouldn’t want to have a kid with

spinsterchachkies · 2021-11-06T05:16:02+00:00

Anal and choking. Especially if they try to do it without asking. I never did anal but someone stuck their finger in my butt once and I never talked to them again after that. It’s a deal breaker and always has been. Stay awaaaaay from my bunghole

neetykeeno · 2021-11-06T06:04:03+00:00

If it has proven to give me yeast infections I am never doing it again for any reason.

FabulousFuchsbau · 2021-11-06T10:06:41+00:00

Deep throating while suffering from severe morning sickness. I ended up throwing up on my husband, when I tried to pull back in time I didn’t notice my teeth scraped his dick pretty bad. He ended up having to get stitches.

Pegging. Not interested. Hubby ain’t interested either. But I do enjoy anal on the receiving end.

Upside down sex. This was a terrible idea, we were both drunk. Was trying to be kinky, my husband was really into it, I ended up with a concussion.

Choking…..meh. Biting? 🤤

Pastelitomaracucho · 2021-11-06T10:49:07+00:00

Period sex. I'm done with the bloody mess

kyjolski · 2021-11-06T12:06:35+00:00

I've no desire to penetrate anally again, never saw the appeal. If a girl asks I'll do it but really cba, and I know a lot of guys are into anal a lot.

Anything scat related or pain focused is off the table.

Most BDSM is just cringy, especially when taken too seriously and controlling everything to the gnat's ass (how fun! /s).

keithcarterarkansas · 2021-11-06T04:18:49+00:00

Marriage

baresquad · 2021-11-06T04:39:34+00:00

This gonna sound wild cause so many dudes love it. But anal

I don’t really see what the big deal is

SaBahRub · 2021-11-06T02:50:17+00:00

Anything that hurts or makes a mess

Or role playing. So cringe, because few people can do it well. Especially me

deste_eloise · 2021-11-06T03:36:42+00:00

Punching the guy in the face. 😬

funlightmandarin · 2021-11-06T10:11:27+00:00

I like a bit of gentle choking and love bites that bruises, and I've also dabbled in some public sex (the weather doesn't permit it often).

But I'm not doing anything anal-related. Hard no. Tossing salads, pegging, anal, nope. No scat-play, golden showers.

Nothing obviously degrading, unbalanced, painful. Sex is supposed to be fun, relaxed, playful and both needs to enjoy it.

social_mule · 2021-11-06T04:13:27+00:00

Raw dogging a ONS.

chubbybutt22 · 2021-11-06T02:49:36+00:00

Nothing I’ve tried before.

ETA: furries.

WillfulGrapefruit · 2021-11-06T05:21:19+00:00

So far, so good. Haven't done anything I wouldn't do again.

I haven't had a partner request something I wasn't at least curious about to begin with...though that might just be lucking out in the alignment department.

Willow-girl · 2021-11-06T05:53:47+00:00

BDSM does nothing for me. I can't get into the headspace at all, which just makes it uncomfortable. Hard pass.

Also, threesomes. I'm not sharing my man with anyone, sorry.

Reisiluu · 2021-11-06T06:37:42+00:00

Pretty much anything that is going to distract me and not let me have an orgasm.

Hello891011 · 2021-11-06T08:37:52+00:00

Pretty much anything except stuff that has to do with shitting lol

Murphysmongoose · 2021-11-06T13:11:15+00:00

Anal in either direction, and choking, like you said. And fucking in the rain... Not as sexy hot as you would imagine. It's fucking cold, yucky feeling:D

Kizka · 2021-11-06T20:07:08+00:00

Being the dominant partner. Tried it once and we were both so weirded out by it that we never spoke about it again and never tried that again. If I were single and a guy would insist on being dominated in the bedroom, I would instantly know that we're not compatible.

redheadbeauty15 · 2021-11-06T03:54:41+00:00

Anything that requires me to be anyone but myself, I really hate puting on a fake performance.

superlurkage · 2021-11-06T09:24:17+00:00

I’m glad I’m not the only one who really hates 69. What a great idea — both people are distracted with their teeth near their partners tender bits! No, I cannot walk and chew gum at the same time, ok?

Actually, why are so many guys afflicted with sex ADHD? I’m blaming porn for now

basedstag · 2021-11-06T02:45:18+00:00

Pegging

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-11-06T09:10:27+00:00

[permanently deleted]

CandleLess · 2021-11-06T14:30:05+00:00

Interesting you mention choking because it's been women in my experience who want to be choked.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2021-11-06T14:31:19+00:00

So I don't particularly precisely subscribe to the theory as stated in the OP, but there is a point to it, meaning there's a difference between "tried anal once and didn't like it" and "willingly and enthusiastically did a bunch of raunchy stuff with my ex, but you get starfish sex once a month, Bucko." I am sure the thinking is more like if some other dude got "the fun stuff" on the regular then why aren't we getting "the fun stuff"? No guy wants to be the guy getting "duty sex" from his wife and then is cleaning out the closet one day and finds a video of her doing a gangbang or lezzing out with three of her hot sorority sisters. I suppose it can be the reverse of the "Madonna-Whore" syndrome. If a woman wants her future husband to feel "less than", be sure to keep that footage laying around like a landmine.

Practical Tip for Dudes: If this happens, religious conversions aside, it can be an "attraction" problem and you can't negotiate attraction (sort of congruent with the OP's idea). If you're not getting what you want, you should look elsewhere. There are plenty of women who will do fun stuff and what one girl thinks is "kinky" another girl will think is "Tuesday night."

On anal, if a woman doesn't want to do anal all she has to do is tell the guy that his dick is WAAAAAY to big, and he will probably go off whistling a happy to and never ask for it again. I'm sure that works like 95% of the time.

Another tip: from a psychological perspective (and girls do this also, in different contexts), you tell someone they can't have something, and that only makes them want it more. Like it's the "Forbidden Fruit," or smth.¹

At appropriate times, i.e. when it's clear we're going to fuck in the near (i.e. immediate) future I will go over an individual girl's "Do's and Don'ts" - "So...what do you like?" - and if anal, which I'm not all that into anyway, comes up I propose her agreeing that I can have it any time I want, and I will agree never to want it. /sorted

Really, the ass is like the South Pole: You go, you explore a little, you plant your flag, and then you go home.

I've never understood the "choking" thing - and really, that's smth that should be discussed in the Pre-Game. I will do it if a girl wants it, ofc - sometimes stuff you do for the other person, assuming it doesn't cross a line for you. I'm a Masculine/Dominant guy and while I like "control" I'm not a sadist and do not enjoy hurting girls - sure, spanking or nipple tweaks in the "fun, sexy" way are one thing, but I was never a pain guy. One ex-gf of mine really wanted to get beaten during sex. I mean BEATEN. To the point I was uncomfortable with it. Not with a closed fist, but otherwise very rough. People like what they like I guess. The first time I did it that way she complained to me it wasn't nearly rough enough. Me: "Well I AM trying to be careful not to kill you, you know?" Like way more than I wanted to do, but I ramped it up over time to where she was happy with it. Not something I would just randomly do to another girl unless they specifically asked for it, though.

Another one loved nipple torture. Severe nipple torture. Teeth, clamps, needles.² /shudder Again, not my thing, but it got the waterworks going downstairs, and yeah, it put me on the "Express Train to Pound Town", so one learns to adapt.

¹ "Because fucking a girl in the ass is a lot like the beginning of the Bible." Hat Tip: Sam Kinison

² I heated them once and thought, "NFW will she dig this." Yeah, guess who was wrong about that. This guy. She fucking LOVED it. Me: "Ugh." I did get points for creativity though. Wherever she is now, I hope she hasn't been murdered. But is she was, she probably loved the ride to get there.

Throwaway18077 · 2021-11-06T15:29:36+00:00

Anything in public. In high school I gave my boyfriend a bj in his car. As I got older I realized how completely humiliated and vulnerable I’d feel if we were caught. So I haven’t done it since and never will again. We only did it to begin with because we couldn’t in our own houses due to strict parents. Now I’m an adult with my own apartment so it especially doesn’t make sense to do again.

Cheshiregrin85 · 2021-11-07T00:26:46+00:00

I've never done anal,rough sex,bdsm,doggy style and never want to but I love pegging and I'm a dominatrix who likes to do those things to men.

Taipanshimshon · 2021-11-06T02:58:29+00:00

It's funny. Every one of those " only creepy dangerous ( insert negative word here ) " thing I've done was literally requested by the woman.

.things im hesitant to do again- 69 It's just awkward for me. I like to focus on what I'm doing.

Ohyarlysmiles · 2021-11-06T04:21:08+00:00

I attract a lot of chicks who are into choking and varying degrees of "getting physical," including being slapped and struck during sex.

Anything past the occasional choke is just too tryhard-go-to-therapy for me

Also....butt stuff. Not a fan.

CimZim · 2021-11-06T09:20:56+00:00

I've never done these, but they are a hard no:

-having sex with a fertile male

-anything that causes longterm pain, bruises, or scars

-scat play

-degrading or humiliating comments

-dangerous forms of bondage

-orgies

Other than these, I can't think of anything I either haven't already done or isn't on my bucket list

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-11-06T06:38:28+00:00

The only people who have asked me to choke them are women. I didn't even know that was a thing until my early 20s.

acmemetalworks · 2021-11-06T09:55:25+00:00

My daughter's mother.

cuckspace · 2021-11-06T10:01:52+00:00

Sexting or flirting sexually with strangers on instant messaging. Anything you say in private messages between two people could be screenshot and made public on social media. Also any dominant or degrading acts towards a woman that she requests. I don’t trust her to not change her mind later and use it against me. It’s not worth the risk.

Philip8000 · 2021-11-06T10:53:44+00:00

Any kind of non-consensual play is an absolute no for me. I've never understood why anyone would be into that.

Quick_Refuse_5480 · 2021-11-06T12:55:20+00:00

Threesomes

rosesonthefloor · 2021-11-06T13:43:31+00:00

I would never be in a triad relationship again. Way too much drama, all of it from the other woman. Never ever again!

Also I’ve tried being in a dominant role before and it’s just not my bag. I’m not good at it at all lol.

spawnofthedevil · 2021-11-06T14:26:19+00:00

i don’t know if there’s anything i wouldn’t try again, i usually just don’t do something at all if i don’t want to

CandleLess · 2021-11-06T14:27:01+00:00

Sex without a condom and without pulling out with a ONS

PMmeareasontolive · 2021-11-06T16:00:49+00:00

I can't think of anything that I wouldn't do again. If you don't have regrets should you perhaps be trying more stuff? Not necessarily. Maybe you have healthy boundaries for you. But I can think of more things I would have liked to have explored when I had the chance than I can things I wouldn't do again.

ItWasBrokenAlready · 2021-11-06T17:43:12+00:00

Warming/arousing lube. Tried once for novelty. Never ever ever again. THE BURN, AAAAGHR.

MommysPills · 2021-11-06T21:20:53+00:00

A relationship.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-11-06T09:34:02+00:00

I've tried boring vanilla sex and will never do it again.

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-11-06T03:14:11+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Mimoxs · 2021-11-06T07:42:02+00:00

Wearing my clothes and pretending to be a woman. I was holding back a combination of laughter and cringing at the same time, the whole time. It was so hard to stay neutral

I don't think most dudes here would have an issue with this though.

Also, it ruined my clothes. Stretched them out.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-11-06T03:24:33+00:00

So there's two questions here the main question of

"what have you tried in a sexual context that you will never do again?" For me the answer is shower sex, nothing super against it I don't mind doing a little fooling around in the shower but actually fucking in the shower I just find uncomfortable and overrated

As far as what kind of sexual behavior would raise a red flag? If she's into shit play or a furry or something like that, thanks but no thanks

But I do agree with the sentiment that if a girl like doing anal, or threesomes or choking whatever the fuck with an ex-boyfriend but now "she doesn't do that anymore", she's not as attracted to you and any guy who is not desperate and has Common Sense would get all the way the hell out, dismissed

Sagittarius_AAA · 2021-11-06T02:49:05+00:00

A little exaggerated?

Kanonicman · 2021-11-06T03:34:16+00:00

You might want to take my answer with a grain of salt - As I may be a literal "abuser and murderer" in the future.

A woman once told me that she would like to use a dildo on a man, if I would let her - I told her that I am not into that.

I did / do not consider it a red flag though. It never came up again and the sex and relationship was great.

Maybe this is my "abuser and murderer" side speaking, but the vast majority of women I was with liked choking. Some even asked for it. You obviously have to have the technique down for it not to hurt anyone.

majani · 2021-11-06T09:33:07+00:00

I tried anal on two women but my dick wouldn't fit. On the second lady I tried inserting for 30minutes using lube and a butt plug to pry her ass open nice and easy, but it was still just way too big. After that, I will never try again.

AreOut · 2021-11-06T06:14:09+00:00

unprotected anal with a prostitute...yes that was totally irresponsible, 3 months waiting for a HIV test was a long time, despite the chance for actually contracting it from quite a short contact(I came quickly in her ass) was less than 0.1%

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-11-06T04:06:28+00:00

Out of things I've actually done before: shower sex, sex in a public place, phone sex, or being on top.

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Dukhaville · 2021-11-07T17:23:41+00:00

Period sex.

Sex in water.

Sex outside in countries with mosquitoes

Expensive-Guitar3609 · 2021-11-07T18:13:40+00:00

Being naked with another man in the room, torturing the woman I'm with in any way (I dumped a girl because after I spanked and pulled her hair a little as requested, she asked me to choke her, slap her in the face and spit in her mouth, I choked her a little but holy shit I went soft almost inmediatly, hard pass) and sticking something in my ass which I find emasculating. Other than that, Idk... Something involving shit or pee may be?

Never did it and I'm not up for it.

theosamabahama · 2021-11-08T04:28:12+00:00

For me, guys who like choking are an instant disqualification. It's a predictor for future abuse and literal murder.

What the fuck ? So women who like being choqued want to be abused and killed ? What logic is that?

Title	Q4ALL- What have you tried in a sexual context that you would never do again?
Author	Miserable_Yam4778
Upvotes	36
Comments	223
Date	November 6, 2021 2:43 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/qnr0zh/q4all_what_have_you_tried_in_a_sexual_context/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4all-what-have-you-tried-in-a-sexual-context-that.1085665 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085665