Q4W: If you were a man, how would you go about finding a relationship? Do you think you would be successful or would it be too difficult?

ohheyhi99 · 2019-11-11T19:58:02+00:00

IMO, This question could have been improved by asking the women to imagine themselves as men with comparable standards and preferences to the ones they currently have as women. Getting into a relationship is easy for most people if they have no standards or preferences.

Edit: where’s the automod?

Nevidimka- · 2019-11-11T19:51:43+00:00

considering that I am taller than the average woman, make more than the average woman (and more than the average man) , love doing heavy weightlifting at the gym and have a fairly athletic build to begin with, I think the male version of me would have the basics down. My brother who is my male equivalent certainly never had problems getting girls.

I would invest heavily in a large social circle in college, it's easiest to get to know women in your social circle. I would move to a bigger city after that. I would sign up for OLD as well for the heck of it. I would network a lot if I was a little older, but NOT cold approach while there, just to widen my social circle. The guys I know who seem to do well all have a lot of friends, that includes male friends. They know a lot of girls because that's Steven's sister, that's Johns co worker, that's the girl behind the bar at Marc's café etc etc. Cold approach almost never works so I'd rely on contacts, mostly.

pngmafia97 · 2019-11-11T21:32:25+00:00

If I am taller than 5’7” and face >6 with the same IQ and EQ I have now it would be relatively intuitive. If I were short and ugly, I don’t know, I would have to develop some compensatory strategies I’m not familiar with now. Hone in on a talent/passion so that I have a lot of success and status.

D_D_BA4 · 2019-11-12T04:00:12+00:00

If most women woke up one morning as a man, they would jump of the nearest cliff. They wouldn't be able to handle a single day.

Texastentialism · 2019-11-11T19:28:09+00:00

Would depend on what kind of relationship I was looking for and with what type of woman.

The men in my circle seemed to do it by having active social/party lives and hooking up until they found a girl they wanted to stick around. A lot of these became serious LTRs and marriages.

The men at my Christian college generally did it by meeting girls through their sister social clubs (Christian college version of Greek life), volunteering, or dating girls they met when they were young through church/camp etc. Obviously these were very different men who ended up with very different women than the first group.

Level of difficulty would depend on your personality and attractiveness. This is really too broad a question to answer with much specificity. A man with my exact personality in a man's body would probably be fucked tbh

oldhag888 · 2019-11-12T02:28:23+00:00

Tbh I’m not a man and don’t know what it’s like to be one, I think it’s a flawed question bc I can’t insert myself into that perspective

My best answer would be:

1) try not to worry about it too much, these things usually come when you least expect it and are not overly obsessed with it

2) focus on self development and goals- by improving ourselves we become the best version of ourselves and we naturally attract people who are well matched to that superior self.

But this advice isn’t any different from what I told myself when I was single, or what I tell my single friends, male or female.

PlainSlim · 2019-11-12T04:53:16+00:00

Honestly, I would be screwed and I know it. I have trouble dating as a pretty attractive woman. I am terrified of rejection, I am introverted, I don't really like lifting. I prefer when other people take the initiative in social interaction so I never have to feel rejected. I guess the male version of me would be above average height, above average looks, decent career? I'd make a tinder and see what stuck. I think most women would think I was too reserved/boring though. It's also weird to think about because I like men, I like assertive/masculine men. I don't think I could be attracted to women or ever want to take the more assertive role in a relationship. I guess unless I also inherited more masculine desires, I'd probably just end up gay lol.

Niki_Biryani · 2019-11-12T01:57:02+00:00

Most women would be recked and depressed if they were a man. Not to mention, most of them would be extremely unattractive.

-TheGreasyPole- · 2019-11-11T19:39:01+00:00

[removed]

DontTouchTheCancer · 2019-11-11T20:35:08+00:00

My famous wit, of course. Also if I were a guy I would look like Edward Norton.

Sad_Oil · 2019-11-11T20:44:26+00:00

Would be easy. I have a masculine face, I know I'd be attractive as a guy. Always been told I have masculine energy/people assume I'm a lesbian, I love the chase and going after what I want. Guys close up if you chase them, so I don't chase men lol. But girls are so simple. Don't be ugly, don't be boring, be confident, do nice things for them, flirt with them, you're in control. Once she likes you, boom, that's it. She'll do whatever mental gymnastics it takes to convince herself you're the love of her life.

[deleted] · 2019-11-11T19:19:01+00:00

Finding a relationship as a man should be the easiest thing in the world as long as you're not hideous and poor. Most women over 26 want nothing more than a relationship with a man who is not completely ugly and unemployed. There are many women desperate for a relationship. (despite all evidence showing that relationships and marriage are actually better deals for men than for women)

-TheGreasyPole- · 2019-11-11T20:51:08+00:00

As automod has decided to fuck off for no reason at all...

beep boop. I am pretending to be automod.

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.

For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am NOT a bot, and this action was performed manually because you never can trust code to run when you want it to. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. But we won't care.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-11-11T21:05:59+00:00

A relationship or sex?

This seems like the wrong q

CatchPhraze · 2019-11-11T20:42:59+00:00

You mean get to eat carbs, pay half as much for nice clothes, not have to shave my legs, skip half my daily grooming, get twice the results at the gym for the same time and still be putting in twice the effort most men do while only doing about 2/3rds of what I did as a woman?

I'd be giggling to myself about how lucky the low standards for well groomed men are.

flamingoinghome · 2019-11-11T19:41:16+00:00

Are we talking a LTR?

Make myself a few dating apps, and go to plenty of happy hours and meetups. If I get to chatting with a girl I like, ask her on a date. Keep taking her on dates (for various values of "her"), until I decide if I want to be in a LTR with her. If no, So Long and Thanks For All The Fish. If yes, ask her to be my girlfriend.

Sad_Oil · 2019-11-11T20:25:34+00:00

[deleted]

littlecow888 · 2019-11-11T21:49:20+00:00

I wouldn’t get beaten for liking girls, that’s a great beginning.

CanadianTurt1e · 2019-11-11T21:30:26+00:00

i know how to game girls lol. if you can't get a fucking girlfriend you're an ineffectual dope. im a straight girl and have basically had a girlfriend by accident before because girls are so desperate for the validation of being chosen

Sophiatab · 2019-11-12T00:53:02+00:00

Make an appointment with a matchmaker, answer some questions, read some files, be introduced, go on a few dates, and then pick a partner. When men complain about not being able to find someone most often they're complaining about not being able to find someone to just use for sex. It's easy for a man to find a relationship if he wants one.

Title	Q4W: If you were a man, how would you go about finding a relationship? Do you think you would be successful or would it be too difficult?
Author	_Neon_Shadow_
Upvotes	11
Comments	195
Date	November 11, 2019 6:31 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	/r/PurplePillDebate
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-if-you-were-a-man-how-would-you-go-about.294837 https://theredarchive.com/post/294837
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/duwl8p/q4w_if_you_were_a_man_how_would_you_go_about/