The Modern hypocrisy of A lot of Women sexualizing and objectifying themselves and then being upset when they are treated as sexual objects is proof that the modern world lets female hypocrisy slide on a large scale

sublimemongrel · 2020-06-12T00:03:10+00:00

I don’t think there is some sort of significant group of women who both deliberately sexualize themselves online and then yell at men for being objectifying. I’m sure it happens but I don’t think it’s some widespread thing you can claim “women” do. “A lot of women” is a vague term it basically means nothing.

YasuotheChosenOne · 2020-06-11T22:35:41+00:00

Some women. I can tell my ex-stripper friend "Nice tits" and she just smiles (because they are spectacular).

This sub has a problem with taking segments of society and pasting them on all of society.

Yes there are women who do this, I once interacted with one like that, but its not a majority of women, just some women.

Also this sub has a fascination with low IQ twitter and IG types. Quit caring about what trash does.

LillthOfBabylon · 2020-06-12T10:33:30+00:00

Sexualizing themselves on social media to an insane degree, then at the same time getting super angry and indignant when a man has the audacity to sexualize them?

These women are in the minority. UNLESS the guy is being a total creep about it.

If a woman doesn’t sexualize herself at all in her photos or in general in the slightest, then if she’s also a little annoyed or upset when men sexualize or objectify her, then I 100% understand and agree and sympathize with her and might even break the cardinal rule (though shalt not simp) and white knight a bit if I see her getting annoyed by some guy who’s not catching the hints... because yes, she didn’t put herself out there like that at all.

And alternatively ...

That's far more common than you think it is. Understand, a lot of men sexualize girls starting at 12. I've never wore skimpy outfits, but because Im busty, guys would approach me. Some knew very well I could be their daughter's age.

If a woman sexualizes herself blatantly but then ALSO is super relaxed and unfazed and takes it playfully when men hit on her or sexualize her, then Thats 100% fine too!

Again, this depends on the guy. Is he being creepy about it? I don't care how sexualized she is, don't make people uncomfortable.

when women do what the title says (which is many of them) and sexualize themselves hard and then act like you’re a creep and misogynistic for hitting on them,

There's a right way to hit on people and a wrong way.

but hitting on someone for a minute who has half naked photos online and is flaunting herself in public ,and then being called the worst names because of it and made to feel like a creep is what im talking about, its wrong

WHAT IS THE CONTEXT?

The problem with you guys is that you guys won't provide an example of what you're talking about. Perhaps, that guy was being an absolute creep.
If he's talking about locking her in a basement and raping her for all eternity, I would think that'd be a problem.

LittyKitsune · 2020-06-11T23:04:10+00:00

Women are sexualized no matter what we wear tbh. Attractive is attractive. Covering it up won't suddenly "un-objectify" you in the eyes of a man who sees women as objects. "Men will respect you if you dress like a lady" is one of the biggest myths conservatives hear growing up.

My high school's gym uniform was super unflattering (we literally looked like a bunch of potatoes) and there were still men who would try to catch our attention or make comments through the gates when we ran laps outside. The standard uniform wasn't exactly sexy either and I would still get hit on when I wore it outside of school.

I'm religious so I still try to do the whole modesty thing, as do many of my friends. We still have run-ins with sleazy guys.

Apples083 · 2020-06-11T23:54:51+00:00

hello, female here.

I don’t sexualize myself and lots of women don’t. Instagram models and adult industry ladies I know do this as a job. Sexualizing themselves is a choice they make that works to get a salary.

Other women in my day to day life have had rough childhoods and realize that sexualizing themselves will get them “love” but it ain’t real love, just some dude tryna get his dick wet.

After a certain age, we own our femininity. A confident women doesn’t sexualize herself. It’s not her fault that what she chooses to wear etc is seen through a mans eyes that way.

The society we are raised in unfortunately tells women that their worth is in their beauty and men that it is in their success and bank account. It takes a few years for us as genders to try to defy this concept.

My two cents as a girl in mid 20’s :)

Awkward-Office · 2020-06-12T01:11:38+00:00

I was going to agree until I realised I don’t agree with the same in reverse so why should I agree with women being treated this way? If a man was shirtless and making sexual innuendos online it would be wrong if women started objectifying him and saying degrading stuff to him. Only lowlife men and women do this and they deserve to be called out as creeps. If I saw a hot guy showing off his abs online I’d think to myself ‘wow that’s attractive’ and then move on with my life without trying to crush said man with neither flattering nor unflattering attention.

hypothememe · 2020-06-11T23:01:18+00:00

[deleted]

GennyX · 2020-06-12T01:19:05+00:00

Both genders are sexual beings and deserve to be treated with respect.

wafflecorner · 2020-06-11T23:53:07+00:00

I don't think this post adequately describes what "sexualizing ones self" is. If I'm going on a date with my boyfriend and I wear something nice I would say Im objectifying myself, I want my boyfriend to find me attractive and I wear something that shows that. However if walking to the date I get catcalled I don't think that's appropriate, the boundary there is that its not for them. Part of the implicit assumption here is that by looking a certain way means you're asking for whatever attention you get which I don't think is true. This also is not a linear scale for a lot of women, women with big boobs have different standards imposed on them as to what 'modest' is. What if a shirt isn't low-cut but because she's busty and it shows cleavage people assume she's asking to be flirted with. The problem with this reasoning is that there is no line in the sand for when a woman is sexualizing herself. Bottom line is assuming attention or behavior is implicitly ok because of clothing choices is a slippery slope, and be respectful when you talk to people. I'm not saying some of these women aren't trying to pick a fight but this frustration usually comes from constant unwarranted sexual advances.

So in response, I pose a question. If a girl posts a photo in a bikini on the beach a lot of people think its ok to comment "nice ass" or something along those lines but would feel it not ok to say that to her on the beach in person. What makes this interaction different? Is she sexualizing herself in one case but not the other? She was wearing appropriate clothing to be around perhaps hundreds of people on the beach but what about her hundreds of followers?

wowthrway · 2020-06-12T09:41:55+00:00

Just because a woman can sexualize herself, doesn't mean YOU should too... Yeah she might be asking for the wrong kind of attention, but why would you want to be the guy that gives her the wrong kind of attention? That screams creep, and also shows who she should avoid if you can't control your impulses around her. You can still naturally respect a woman that dresses provocatively just as you would respect anyone. It's not like you're trying to be in a relationship with her, then you would have standards that you would respect specific to you.

keepturning1 · 2020-06-12T11:36:12+00:00

This sounds like you’ve had maybe one interaction like this and are now coming on here to make it sound like it’s something more common than it is. You were probably out of this woman’s league and she shot you down and now you’re butt hurt about it. Sexy women want attention... from sexy men. That’s who they’re dressing up for if not just for themselves because it makes them feel good. Deal with it. And if it is more than one instance then this tells me you need to either work on yourself and become more attractive or go for women in your range. Don’t just walk up to a woman and hit on her because she’s dressed sexily. Try actually flirt with her first from a distance and if she reciprocates then you go and hit on her.

EdgeCityRed · 2020-06-12T12:43:49+00:00

Ehhh, this is entitlement. "I'm entitled to this person's attention because they present themselves a certain way so they must want attention."

The rapper analogy isn't a good one either, because no baller rapper takes every random groupie shopping, either, right? He doesn't owe them anything. That's entitlement.

SherbertBacon · 2020-06-11T23:51:10+00:00

when women do what the title says (which is many of them)

How many women are actually doing this consciously though? We have a confusing cultural narrative where "sexualized" and "attractive" can be mixed up as the same thing (they absolutely aren't). I think your first "counter-example" is far more common than you give credit for. Some (many?) women may like to advertise themselves as attractive, appealing, desirable, but men misinterpret this as also sexualized.

Its hypocrisy that upsets me, from any gender

That's fair, but I also think you're getting upset over something that's mostly imaginary by your own creation.

cheezypussy · 2020-06-12T01:34:57+00:00

First of all, this is a fantasy character or a minority. I seriously doubt theres enough women who simultaneously sexualize themselves and get upset when they get hit on for it to be considered a 'modern world' problem. In my opinion, you are conflating flirting and creepy behavior.

Secondly, Why is a woman simply wearing being "half naked" objectifying herself? I don't see many people describe shirtless men in public as self-objectifying themselves. This double standard is simply misogyny. Sexualization =/= objectification.

ResponsibleCharacter · 2020-06-12T02:57:00+00:00

The issue here is that you see a certain type of dress or behavior from women as an invitation and it's not. It's really not.

I would never feel entitled enough to march up on some rich "baller" and demand he take me shopping, dafuq? That's nearly as fucked as feeling entitled to a woman's body because she looks good.

0seagirl · 2020-06-12T08:52:23+00:00

How we dress ourselves isn't an invitation.

Why is it so hard for men to realise that women can want to look sexy or dress down and also want to be left alone?

It really should not be this complex.

It really gets me down in the summer months, when covering up isn't an option, and men sexually harass me just because they see the shape of my body.

Fucking stop it.

hellobitchitsme · 2020-06-12T10:05:22+00:00

The longer I think about this post the less sense it makes.

First of all the idea that you should be entitled to sexualise someone because they sexualise themselves is very weird. That’s like demanding to use the n-word on someone because they use it or to harm someone because they self harm. You’re not entitled to treat someone the way you want just because they treat themselves a certain way.

Also this principle when taken consistently is ending in „Well with that short skirt you were basically asking to be raped.“ You can sit here all day long and say you don’t actually want to harm anyone but your very logic and principles justify harmful behaviour.

If you come off as creepy to them it might not be that they don’t like you actually hitting on them, it might be that you’re doing it in a weird way. I personally wear very skimpy outfits on a regular basis and I like men looking at me. But some just blatantly stare in a way I actually fear they’re going to follow me home. That’s creepy.

As a woman who’s had a bdsm tumblr for quite a while I also want to say when you put yourself out there sexually the majority of men approaching you are not actually hitting on you but borderline abusive. As a man you probably have no idea what messages a woman gets on a daily basis. I’ve had men literally tell me they want me to drink their piss.

alivejames · 2020-06-12T05:55:56+00:00

The same reason why you can be self-deprecating and call yourself ugly, but if a stranger called you ugly, it would feel uncomfortable and uncalled for

Mimoxs · 2020-06-12T00:40:45+00:00

The primary problem with that is that men will take the most innocent picture and try to make it seem like it's intentionally sexualized.

You're like public schools, you freak out over a bare shoulder or say a girl posting a picture with her friends as the beach is intentionally sexualized bc of shown skin when the posing and intention is clearly not sexual. Or a girl posing to be pretty in full clothing is still sexual bc of her expression, etc etc

Despexco · 2020-06-12T04:16:08+00:00

What counts as sexualization? Depending on the woman, some may consider anything she does or wears to be sexual.

781234567 · 2020-06-12T04:21:36+00:00

I think this needs to be broken down into in real life and online. In real life dressing slutty or modestly will get you similarly objectified. There was once while in slacks and a dress shirt a man propositioned me to go to his hotel room. Creepy dudes gona creep regardless of your outfit.

Online you are exposed a huge pool of men with a level of anonymity. People will talk a lot of shit from behind a screen that they would never dream of in real life. So when you hit on a woman who sexualizes herself online she’s getting hit on by tons of guys who probably take it too far. So she shuts down any propositions because she gets jaded after receiving many skeevy messages. I guy can start out totally nice at first before taking a turn toward hey slut why aren’t you answering I see you’re online you were nice to me now when are we gona fuck?

They are different realms with different rules. Personally I dress sluttier than most but do not have much of an online presence. In real life a man will hit on me, I will turn him down, and that’s that he knows nothing about me and I no longer have to think about him. Online if I were to post a lot of thirst trappy photos I would get hit on, turn down the guy and he still has access to me.

Also I think it’s about staying in your lane. The women who are sexualizing themselves online are usually hot af and are going to choose someone at their level of attraction/income/clout. So if you want a more favorable response start working on your sexy Tiktok routines and thirst trap em right back.

ToraChan23 · 2020-06-12T01:25:48+00:00

Women want to be sexualized on THEIR terms.

That’s the difference.

Sekina7 · 2020-06-12T03:46:30+00:00

Men have been scientifically PROVEN to see women's bodies as sex objects regardless of how the woman dresses, carries herself or interacts with YOU. I have also ready hundreds off comments on Reddit from men disclosing how primally driven they are to have pornographic thoughts and images about the women they know, strangers etc through no fault of the woman-it's just how your brains works so let's be honest about THAT whilst we are on this subject:

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-our-brains-turn-women-into-objects/

Barneysparky · 2020-06-11T23:10:50+00:00

Those are not the same women. How is it so incredibly hard to understand woman are not The Borg.

Silly_Field · 2020-06-12T00:10:40+00:00

It’s not that ridiculous. People aren’t saying they don’t want to be sexual - they’re saying they want to choose when to be sexual and who with.

It’s really very simple.

People who are behaving sexually are still people, not objects.

ontherailstoday · 2020-06-12T00:45:42+00:00

Just because you can see it doesn't mean it is for you.

NarniaFox · 2020-06-12T03:31:17+00:00

If women weren't so sexualized from their early teens, they most likely wouldn't be sexualizing themselves to that degree either. The idea that a woman's sexuality is her the most and only "power" still is alive and well, teens are still bombarded with mixed messages of 'respect yourself" and "prepare your summer body", it's no wonder some of them, maybe even a lot of them, fall into the trap.

And I do think that although the groups of women who objectify themselves and who aren't okay with it overlap to some extent, they aren't completely mutual. There are a lot of women who don't post any sexy photos and still get objectified/sexualized, it just happens whatever you look like.

Also, writing a comment "I'd fuck you/suck your tities" under a bikini photo isn't okay. Whether she's objectifying herself or not, you're still responsible for you being civil. If one smokes and harms their own health, it isn't okay to go and kick them just because they're already doing it to themselves.

theeccentricscribe · 2020-06-12T06:25:57+00:00

Just because a woman is self confident and sharing that on their social media does not give men permission to objectify them. Objectifying assumes these women see themselves as objects per the definition of the word. I know of no woman who shares her body on the internet because she sees herself as an object.

Men objectify women by only acknowledging their sexual appeal and thus the woman feels she is little more than an object of sexual or lustful desire to them. The inherent issue at hand is how men approach a woman who is sharing images of herself that she finds attractive. If a man says "damn those be some fine tits" (Exaggeration but you get the idea) then it is understandable that a woman would feel objectified and thus protect herself from that sort of behavior. If though a man is direct and courteous, for example "Wow your hair looks amazing in this photo" or "That outfit really brings out the color of your eyes" then a woman is less likely to feel objectified as the man is admiring her beauty without being inherently sexual or crass in the essence of his compliment or words.

tat1ana00 · 2020-06-12T15:29:42+00:00

The whole problem with this statement is that women have been told not to wear what they want because it will distract men. Women have been told it was their fault they got raped because of what they were wearing. They have the right to choose what they do with their own bodies. They shouldn’t have to be worried about being catcalled for an outfit that made them feel good about themselves.

soletgo311 · 2020-06-11T22:53:16+00:00

So you take the small glimpses of people's lives from social media, make up this elaborate scenario of "this is what I think so it must be true" and then find reasons to be hurt by it? Just checking if that's what s happening here...

ffivefootnothingg · 2020-06-12T05:48:50+00:00

You’re entirely missing the point though. If i slap my own ass, grab my own tits or whatever that’s fine. Because it’s ... myself doing it to myself. If a man does the same to me without asking that’s called sexual assault. CONSENT. that’s the crux of the issue. also just because a girl posts a few photos of herself in a bikini or a “revealing” outfit- in quotes because modesty is literally one of the LEAST objective topics out there- doesn’t mean in any way that she is inviting the public to sexualize her. You’re making it sound as if the average woman is whoring themselves out for posting attractive pictures of themself, and that’s riiiight where i lose you. Attractive women are ALWAYS attractive, it’s not like boobs or a nice figure have a retractable setting for the 90% of the time that women are just existing and not in sexual scenarios. Just because you can look at a sexy photo of a girl does NOT give you the right to sexualize her; the internet is an infinite place and if she even posted the photo with the intent to attract a certain person, the odds of it being you are very slim. no ones stopping you from sliding into dms, but no one is going to praise you for it either.

emptyspork · 2020-06-12T02:52:01+00:00

Consider - women can dress and act however the fuck they want and don’t deserve to be sexualized or objectified because of it. Consider that sometimes (this might be hard to grasp) but women have lives & experiences outside of the opinions of men, and sometimes even make decisions about how they want to dress & act based on their own thoughts and feelings & not (bear with me) how men might feel about it.

virtualreality_3 · 2020-06-12T11:59:01+00:00

This is interesting because there are a few countries (Egypt, Saudi Arabia, off the top of my head, there are others I am sure) where women dress very modestly yet the men cannot control themselves around them in public.

I agree with the idea that sexuality should be kept private but it's just not realistic. Even if women don't show off their body.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2020-06-12T23:15:46+00:00

Imo, this is only a problem if you've got nothing else going for you personality, career or lifestyle wise but big tits and your sexuality and insecure in this fact. Otherwise, you balance yourself out and you are just a smart woman that loves to feel sexy in leisure time. She still has the upper hand on who she sleeps with and entertains in a serious way and still dictates her professionalism where it counts, so fixating on what random, unimportant men view her as is superfluous and a waste of time.

Who cares if Mike from Trader Joe's she'll never see again nor give the time of day views her as a walking fuck hole and nothing more because her cleavage is peaking through? A sure way to stress yourself out. Imagine being constrained and giving that many free fucks to people you'll never fuck.

RinoaRita · 2020-06-12T00:48:14+00:00

You’re missing a big thing. Women enjoy being objectified by guys they consider attractive. It’s a caricature but that one cartoon where the hot guy says “looking good ladies!” Vs the far ugly guy saying “looking good ladies “ is met with different reactions is fairly accurate.

So basically there’s welcome objectification and there’s unwelcome. If the Instagram influencer gets likes/comments she’s fine because it helps her clout. She complains about the dms because she’s not interested and it takes time from her to sort.

So how’s a guy supposed to know when it’s ok and not? Well the unknown is how attractive are you to her? If you are then it’s ok. But theres no perfect info so there will be mistakes.

Justanuglygirl22 · 2020-06-12T03:02:53+00:00

Posting sexual photos online =/= consent for random creeps to go up and sexually harass/assault them. Just like posting a picture of you boxing online is not consent for any random person to walk up to you and deck you in the face.

richlad · 2020-06-12T01:45:30+00:00

Different groups of people.

One of my cousin dresses provocatively, yet another dresses conservative. Both of them are sisters, the former one is arguably wayyy hotter than the second one.

Former one is also easy going and doesn't mind anything as she isn't insecure about anything because of her extremely good looks.

Second one isn't like that and if you point out that her dresses has a crease or smth equally useless, she will get defensive and argumentative and fall into sadness and self doubts.

Actually there are girls who benefit from objectification by men, then there are women who do not benefit from it so they feel like a phariha.

But should we care about it? No, because same thing applies to men. Some men are naturally of some specific type and women expect all men to be like them. Some men benefit from that characterization, while others lose.

gaylord_fag_4 · 2020-06-12T15:40:57+00:00

I like being sexualized. I just want to be sexualized by the same man long term consistently.

Phantom_Spark · 2020-07-08T13:23:28+00:00

You’re right. And people here will fuss. You aren’t saying ALL but they will interpret any criticism of even a single woman as an attack on all women.

Women just don’t want to be held accountable. Look at Mia Khalifa. Don’t do porn and then get upset when people see you in everyday life and then look at you as a prob star. You did it to yourself.

Sid_Insidious · 2020-06-12T00:14:37+00:00

They are only sexualizing themselvs for who they perceive to be their desired audience. They are either in denial of, or repulsed by, the fact that their display is mostly if not completely public. Female privilege is expecting men to de-select themselves and turn away if they are not worthy. This stems from innate female narcissism, as only a narcissistic creature would put themselves on display and then have contempt for all but a few observers.

help-mejdj · 2020-06-12T13:27:56+00:00

Woman:wears shirt that shows a lot of the boobs and pants that exaggerate the ass

Straight men: looks at it cause they're sexually attracted to those features and they're being flaunted at them

Women:..>:(

bsutansalt · 2020-06-12T03:29:20+00:00

when women do what the title says (which is many of them) and sexualize themselves hard and then act like you’re a creep and misogynistic for hitting on them, theyre trying to have their cake and eat it too and basically gaslight you

Male attention is nice when they're into the guy, and creepy when they're not. SNL make a famous skit about this:

Be attractive, don't be unattractive.

paladine76a · 2020-06-12T12:03:58+00:00

Because women don't do all that for us. They do it for other women. All that tweezing eyebrows, lip injections, waxing hair, gallons of make up, etc is not for men. Women have a social order. It's made of up of alpha females who determine everything. Every fashion choice and style is determined by these elite. All other women do everything they can to match this or else......become outcasts.

Many will get outraged and disagree but it's true. They know men are thirsty simps who will always be around. The approval they seek is from other women.

So your theory about women caring what men say. Not quite there my guy. They don't like being sexualized when they are courting the approval of those elite women around them. We are a distraction to them.

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SaBahRub · 2020-06-12T02:13:59+00:00

Sexuality is capitalized. Sex is money. Money talks

Darkschoolnight · 2020-06-13T00:05:36+00:00

I am not saying that all women think the same or are attracted to men under the same circumstances. Please drop that argument because it was never under discussion.

Are you more likely to find a child in a prison cell or in a playground? Are you more likely to find a monkey in a tree top or on a cooking show? Are you more likely to find a Trump supporter in Gatlinburg, Tennessee or San Francisco, California? Are you more likely to find a woman who is interested in reciprocating your advances at a dating mixer or a funeral?

The original statement I was trying to refute was that ALL contexts for approaching women are vague. Perhaps unlike the OP of this particular thread, I agree with you that some contexts ARE vague since there are no absolutes in this as we can agree all women think differently. For example, you can talk to a woman at a funeral and she may like you back. There is no right or wrong place to approach a woman. I’m not saying don’t approach women at the grocery store. Do it if you want to. But let’s not pretend like location isn’t a variable in the context of a woman being receptive to your advances. How so? One extrapolates their level of receptiveness for the most likely reason that person is there to begin with.

GGMcThroway · 2020-06-14T01:14:57+00:00

Are there really no guys that admire themselves in the mirror when they think they look really good?

That being said, a person liking to look sexy (as in, thinking they themselves look sexy and feeling good when they do it) isn't a direct invitation to be catcalled and harassed in day-to-day life. And even if it's somewhere like a bar people go to to hookup, I've heard too many horror stories of guys not backing off no matter how many times they're told no to fault women for going from zero to freakout the second they get a bad gut feeling. There's a safety aspect you're not considering here.

It also sounds like you're sliding into someone's DMs on FB or IG, which is a big no-no since those are way more personal than dating apps. But if this was on Tinder, then yeah that's dumb since the pics are there for a very specific purpose and you're not going to be in danger if the wrong guy finds you attractive.

atreethatkeepsgrowin · 2020-06-26T01:55:24+00:00

I don’t have a thot insta by any means but my body is very curvy so when I wear a dress or a bathing suit it looks sexy. This means I couldn’t post bathing suit or dress pics or even shorts and a tank top without opening myself up for abuse?

I don’t even follow any guys on insta and I don’t give my handle out. I have one more for work/networking w other artists.

I wish I could just live my life the ways that’s comfortable for me and not have men comment on it.

DaburuKiruDAYO · 2020-07-04T20:19:00+00:00

Well, I think it’s a bit more complex than that. For example, if a bank left it’s doors and safes open and unattended, and someone steals from them- the bank should expect that, and be more responsible. However, the criminal is still the robber. No matter how irresponsible the bank is, that doesn’t justify the robber robbing the bank. It’s still morally wrong. Just because they left the locks open, doesn’t mean it’s an open invitation to raid the bank. You don’t know why they left it open, how they feel about it, the safe bet is to just leave it alone.

Should a woman wearing close to nothing be completely flabbergasted when a man hits on her? No. Unless she explicitly says she wants that. However, the creep is still a creep.

I also believe there’s a difference between commenting publicly “Sexy 😍😍” and DMing the woman until she replies with “hey baby girl I wanna lick those supple tits” and harassing her DMs with creepy messages, that’s not the woman’s fault. Should she expect it? Sure. But is it her fault? No. Is the creep still a creep even when the woman posts sexualized pictures of herself? Yes.

Generally, these women complaining about being “objectified” are referring to weird, genuinely creepy shit like this.

There’s also a difference between responding with a comment to the focal point of her photo (sexiness, tits, whatever), and DMing her. A comment is posted casually and is generally not expected to get a reply. However, DMs are basically saying, “I believe I have a chance with you, and I’m trying to push myself into your life and have sex with you.” I think the general sense of being disrespected comes when it seems a man is assuming and expecting that she wants to have sex with the man.

Basically, I really don’t think a lot of these women are referring to the simple comments complimenting their sexy appearance. I think they’re talking about the actual creeps who expect the woman to want to see their dick and sleep with them. Because contrary to popular belief, just because a woman posts sexy pictures of herself doesn’t mean she wants to sleep with her audience. I think they feel disrespected not when men compliment her, but when a man tries to impose himself onto her.

This might not be what you’re really talking about here but I believe that’s the majority of the women saying they dislike being objectified. I think that’s the whole point, they’re okay with being seen as sexy, alluring, gorgeous, etc. but they aren’t really okay with being equated to sex toys. That’s what objectification is really about.

And I really don’t think there are a lot of women who post clearly sexy photos of themselves and yell at people when being called sexy. But I think they have the right to be upset when they get creepy DMs like “I wanna lick ur pussy”. She should expect it, yes, but the creep is still a creep.

Edit: Also I believe those women do sexualize themselves but not necessarily objectify. Unless they’re a very specific type of porn star that captions their posts with “use me like a fuckdoll” or something lol. Those women expect and want to be seen as a sexy HUMAN. Not a sexy fleshlight, if you know what I mean. I feel that being sexualized and objectified are completely different things, and it’s completely understandable for sexual women to be upset about being objectified.

Shenay_Everest · 2020-07-07T19:43:14+00:00

First things first, I don't think a woman can sexualise herself, she can only be sexual.

Secondly, could you please give an example of one woman who does this, just to prove this actually happens, and could you please give multiple pieces of evidence to show that many women do this? 'Cause I've never seen this, not once, in my life. I am not saying you are wrong, I just need evidence to know that this is true, and for me to truly understand what you are trying to get at.

Third of all, I think a lot of men are confused between women doing what they feel like doing and women being sexual. For example, I would love to go out with a sports bra and shorts, but I am scared of being sexualised. There's outfits that look really good like suits with a lingerie top, but I'm scared of being sexualised. I would like to twerk with my friends at parties, but I'm scared of a dude walking up behind me and sexualising me. These are a few things that I would like to wear and do, but guys would see it as a calling for sexual attention. There are some people that are obviously doing it for sexual attention, but there are a lot of us that don't want it.

The-Wizard-of-Oz- · 2020-07-13T02:11:19+00:00

True.

Kilkifish · 2020-07-27T06:13:17+00:00

I couldn't agree more. This is a widespread occurrence and a lot of women are in denial about it to the detriment of themselves and our daughters.

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-06-11T22:49:33+00:00

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Proteinsaurus · 2020-06-12T02:35:21+00:00

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Global_MGTOW · 2020-06-12T15:14:30+00:00

The biggest sexualizer of women, is other women. Go to any dating site or even just general social media sites and look at women's pictures, you'll notice a trend going on. The majority of women's profiles features a photo of them starting at the bottom with their breast, going to the top of their hair. Almost every women's profile is a picture saying "here's my breast and my face".

It's another issue that gets blamed on men, instead of women taking responsibility for their actions like slut shaming. Many people will tell you that men are slut shamers and that's an issue, but the biggest slut shamers I've ever known or see have all been women, yet women slut shaming isn't an issue but men slut shaming somehow is?

praneymo · 2020-06-12T08:39:51+00:00

When women peddle their sexuality, they become sex objects.

GennyX · 2020-06-12T11:46:42+00:00

Feminists destroy the beauty of women:

Look at before and afters this is a political agenda.

ihavesprivilige · 2020-06-12T04:43:57+00:00

Sexualizing themselves on social media to an insane degree, then at the same time getting super angry and indignant when a man has the audacity to sexualize them

It's called a fitness test. It's easy to pass the best way is to agree and amplify. Start chatting with her, then let her know you're getting confused cause it's hard to think about her without thinking about that booty

RimbaudsRevenge · 2020-06-12T09:16:12+00:00

If a woman sexualizes herself blatantly but then ALSO is super relaxed and unfazed and takes it playfully when men hit on her or sexualize her, then Thats 100% fine too! I respect and like that woman and even if she nicely refuses to engage me or others after the first interactions but does it in a nice and understanding way, then im super fine with it and take it like a fun game I struck out on cause she’s just not interested.

This! In these cases I feel like she's both genuinely liking the attention and at the same time there's something like self-irony and a warm sense of humor there. Hot/sexy behavior and presentation is both thrilling and also incredibly silly. The gratification is unironic but she's also gently poking fun at you, at herself and the whole situation. That I like. Sexy + funny + kind is an incredible combination.

It's only in this sort of interaction anyone that can get a reaction from me anymore. Other women who don't do this thing, pair sexy looks with a boring attitude and a lack of humor, they're sexually invisible to me. I subconsciously filter it out I guess. First it was out of politeness and how I was raised but it's become automatic for me.

Not that they would know of course, 98% of the time. After all, people who fish for reactions with looks typically don't notice people who don't notice them. Fine with me, but there's also those rare occurrences when someone tries to provoke reactions but get annoyed because you manage to make them feel desexualized in your non-response to it all.

That of course is incredibly funny.

czarkohl · 2020-06-12T16:43:43+00:00

Maybe, just maybe all Beans and Fears have a spectrum of different, personal preferences of acceptable behavior relative to our unique experiences as individuals?

I'm bisexual and enjoy admiring the sensuality of all consenting adult creatures and have a lot of nude figure drawing sessions under my belt, however I do not assume the leisure of OPEN Lee expressing the depraved things I'd to others, especially in a public forum where they've not expressed comfort && consent with quite that level of intimacy.

Similarly: Go to a strip club, look but don't touch w/o permission, otherwise we come off like the nephew of Russell a lá Survivor or Judge Claude Frollo.

🛎

hypothememe · 2020-06-12T19:36:43+00:00

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wtknight · 2020-06-12T20:52:41+00:00

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Protocol_Apollo · 2020-06-12T21:50:55+00:00

Women are sex objects. Men are success objects.

Deep down both sexes know of this.

Look at women do to keep their beauty/inflate it.

Hair extensions, fake lashes, lipstick, eye liner, contour, skin care routines.

Push-up bras, revealing clothes, dresses that accentuate their curves, high heels, thigh high boots.

If women aren’t sex objects, and don’t wear makeup for potential mates, ask them to not wear makeup.

They’ll never do it. They would never be caught dead looking like shit if their crush saw them.

They’ll hamster it away as “MUH society tells me to wear it”.

So okay, why don’t you be the first not to wear it?

Women sexualise themselves online with instagram, Facebook, all kinds of social media, what they wear, what they put on their skin.

Why do you think most girls who workout tend to work on their ass/legs. Because these increase SMV.

But you know what’s worse than a woman who is sexualised?

A woman who isn’t.

This would be a pitiful woman just like a pitiful man would be one who smokes pot and plays video games 24/7.

A famous comedian once said, “do you know what would happen if men couldn’t fuck women? They would hunt them just for fun

Not because men hate women, but because they literally wouldn’t know what else to do with them.”

hypothememe · 2020-06-12T22:06:09+00:00

The fact that so many women (and men) in the comments are strawmanning what I said and making it super extreme ( like the dozen comments saying “so what, you’re entitled to just grab titties whenever you see them! You’re entitled to screw every woman u see, then!?!l”)..

Its hilariously proving my points (and also making me question many of your reading skills)

-im pointing out how many women take the slightest but of flirting as being sexually harassed, and your response is “no thats not true, we don’t blow things out of proportion... but your balanced take on the matter is literally RAPE APOLOGY you scum!!”.... hahahahaha do you not see how that proves my point exactly!? Lol like wow.

-just because I disagree with your extreme viewpoint does NOT automatically make me agree with the opposite extreme! So stop comparing it to that. I gave a balanced take but anything thats not your view is considered evil in your eyes.. thats called extremism and ideologist dogma (tho there was quite a few balanced disagreements so thats great, thats the whole point of the sub)

-I literally said if shes dressed normally then I would jump in to help her fend off creeps

-I never said anything about being entitled to anything, except that men are allowed to be attracted and talk to you if you’re putting yourself out there.. not harass or make rude comments, but to look and talk to you.. its called a society, ppl are allowed to approach and talk to you without being labeled as defective criminals. Get a grip. And the ones that take it too far are wrong and many white knights will help you fend them off

wekacuck · 2020-06-12T22:45:25+00:00

If men insist on sexually objectifying women, then women are forced to sexualize themselves in order to obtain male attention. Therefore women complaining about having to sexualize themselves is not a hypocrisy.

Similarly when women require men to monkeydance/pay for dinner, men who monkedance/pay for dinner and complain about having to monkeydance/pay for dinner are not being hypocritical.

ResponsibleCharacter · 2020-06-12T00:23:10+00:00

Essentially women want to dress like sluts, act like sluts and suck dick like sluts but don't wanna be called sluts. Same thing with them claiming they want equality but backtrack and say they should be paid the same as men despite working less hours.

2020-06-12T16:12:34+00:00

As a woman I agree with you. I don’t think the majority of women do this, but I’ve seen it enough that it’s somewhat of a pattern, especially among younger women.

It’s the equivalent of a man flashing his wealth all over the place and getting pissed when women want to gold dig. Men who want to be appreciated for their attributes other than wealth and don’t want to have to deal with predatory women shouldn’t drive a super nice car/wear a fancy watch/post all of that on instagram.

Woodan11 · 2020-06-12T18:53:40+00:00

YES YES YES!!! This is such an important post! This issue needs to be honestly discussed so much more. I’ve been trying to find the right wording to describe this. Huge issue. You did it! Thanks for the post.

Overarching_Chaos · 2020-06-12T03:34:02+00:00

The problem here is that society does not expect women to assume individual responsibility to the same extent as men are. If you are a man, most bad things that happen to you are because of your choices. If you are a woman, most bad things that happen to you are because of other people’s choices (namely men). This mentality is also advocated by feminism who essentially reinforces the female victim culture.

That’s why you see many women blatantly sexualising themselves on social media (especially IG) and then expecting to be treated like they’re Virgin Mary. In their heads they believe that their behaviour has no impact on how others (especially men) treat them and therefore all these thirsty men they attract must be creeps/misogynists.

hippiefromolema · 2020-06-12T03:55:35+00:00

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Silverfox17421 · 2020-06-12T00:12:59+00:00

Of all the insane behaviors women engage in, this has to be one of the worst. Back in the day, when most women were real women and not feminists, they knew that if they dressed sexy, they'd get a lot of male attention. If you asked her why she dressed all sexy, she would say it was to attract men. Duh. If you want to turn men off, maybe find the unsexiest clothes you can find and wear those.

Enter the insanity of modern feminism, where nothing is quite as it seems, and things get curioser and curioser the deeper you tumble down the feminist rabbit hole. No matter. We are now in Feministland, and we're all mad here.

Feminists have decided, against all reason, that women have a right to dress as sexy, dirty, and nasty as they want. No argument there. But if you dress like a whore, expect to be treated as one! If you don't want to be treated like a whore, then don't dress like one! But no.

They want to wear the sexiest, dirtiest, nastiest, most revealing clothes - clothes which are designed for explicit purpose of turning on men, mind you - and then they get furious when men look at them and objectify them. Hell, you objectified yourselves, ladies! The minute you put on that dirty revealing outfit, you turned yourself into a blatant sex symbol that's almost crying out for the stares of every man who sees you!

As with most things female, it's the younger women who are the more insane about this. Minor teenage girls in particular blow up about this all the time. A lot of silly women keep doing this all through their 20's. The better looking they are, the more insane they are about this.

After age 30, women get a Hell of a lot more sense, and you don't hear this quite so much except for some real backwoods boneheads, and most realize they re fighting losing battles, and stop charging at all sorts of male windmills.

Once they start getting into their 40's and 50's, they want men to look at them, and they often brag about how they turn young men's heads.

The motto of modern feminism: Women get all the freedom and none of the responsibility that goes along with it!

krmaml · 2020-06-12T02:12:12+00:00

The funniest one's are those who put their ass/tits as thumbnail on their Youtube travel/cooking/DIY video to get views and then get offended when guys write sleazy comments.

Its really nonsensical to critisize the mindset You're benefitting from.

queenofcabinfever777 · 2020-06-12T03:11:41+00:00

I’m glad you said something like this: there is a girl who i have known since high school and follow her on Instagram- she constantly posts photos of herself in lingerie, next to nude, in sexy poses. At one point she was fed up with “unwanted attention” because she wasn’t asking to be sexualized but was straight up playing the part in a bedroom timeline where somebody is about to get SOMETHING. Does she feel like she’s just being a model to an anonymous group? Why would she tag these things if she didn’t realize there would be negative consequences (people either wanting more, or being interested in her body which is plastered all over her page). Social networking is mean to be social, and it seems like she is putting that social vibe out there to connect with people who want that type of connection.

petechamp · 2020-06-12T12:42:50+00:00

As a case in point, as a female who does not wish to be sexualised, would you comment or behave differently if a man was wearing a tiny pair of bright coloured shorts? As a guy, pretty much all men I see will wear either a pair of jeans or dark coloured trousers, otherwise people say they're "peacock" dressing or doing it to get attention.