This would obviously be difficult if the man is married (why did you even get married in the first place when there are no benefits to it?). But otherwise a man should discard any woman who makes him jump through hoops for sex. It shows that she has no actual attraction for the man and will use him to extract resources/time/attention/whatever else, while dangling the carrot of sex to manipulate him into doing what she wants.

Now the common response to this is "but women's attraction works differently, women have to get to know the man, women need to build a connection". These are simply rationalizations given to average men in order to convince these men to give women what they want. Women's attraction does NOT work any differently from male attraction IF you find a woman who is actually attracted to you in that way.

Basically you need to ask yourself this simple question - would she make Christ Hemsworth or Zac Efron or insert name of other hot celebrity jump through many hoops for sex and make him wait months? No of course not. So men should not put up with it if it happens to them.