I saw a highly upvoted post that suggested women were more insecure than men here.

In fact that poster repeated a similar sentiment in a separate OP here.

He and I had a decent back and forth where my personal understanding of how insecurity manifests between sexes was detailed in my reply to him:

You tend to notice some women being expressive about an insecurity when 99% of the time that same woman is expressive about everything. A lot of women have no qualms expressing the full spectrum of emotions. So if that woman is typically effusive when she’s delighted about something, expect the same intensity when she’s insecure about something. It does not mean she's experiencing more insecurity than a man.

Funnily enough if you ask a bunch of women this question, many would say men are without a doubt more insecure. Or are the very least equally as insecure.

Depends on the man how he expresses it. If he’s typically stoic across the board he’ll express it in a stoic way (i.e. measured and won't express it).

If he’s typically explosive or violent he’ll express it that way. I have so many female friends with brothers who say “haha yeah my bro used to punch through the wall all the time.”

If he’s a sulker type he’ll express it by being moody brooding or else.

If he typically bitches a lot he’ll express it that way.

If he’s a passive aggressive snarkster it will undoubtedly show itself in that way.

Idk. I don’t think we’re on the same page in this regard.

For example a lot of people think I have zero insecurities but those same people also often call me aloof or non-expressive in general. That's just me. I realize I have the same insecurities as many of my friends but I just process them differently. I filtrate out anxiety in a very methodical way and so I don't get hyper excitable. But it doesn't mean I don't have the insecurity. I just internalize them differently.

I'm curious to all of your thoughts on this. Or how you conceive it all.