Women are dishonest about what they are attracted to in men

Right_Teaching_8193 · 2022-10-04T07:50:00+00:00

As a lesbian I gotta say you're right lol I hate how much women lie about the dumbest things. Sometimes I think they want to convince themselves that they're not like others too much.

Bandit174 · 2022-10-03T15:03:33+00:00

Its crazy how much of a difference a few inches makes. Like between 5'8 and 5'10 its 138k more per year vs 24k more per year.

Rube-And-Tug · 2022-10-03T14:48:54+00:00

Re: #2 I think a lot of the confusion on the personality vs dating success comes from people who conflate ‘personality’ with being a good person or a radical feminist. You’ll usually see the ‘maybe it’s your personality!!!’ crowd say that whoever they’re talking to should go to therapy or learn to respect women when those aren’t really the aspects of personality that matter much in being attractive, since we all know some misogynist men and men who are all around bad people can still do well with women

I would argue that game (being confident, funny, somewhat indifferent) and having emotional intelligence count as an aspect of personality. So it does matter, just not in the way a lot of people claim it does

carritotaquito · 2022-10-03T15:20:20+00:00

It would be interesting to see how good looking short guys compare to not so good looking tall guys. I know plenty of females who will date a less attractive tall guy over a great looking short guy

luliloo · 2022-10-04T02:23:04+00:00

Women aren’t dishonest or underplaying the important of traits on purpose.

They believe what they are saying. Their actions just don’t match.

It’s like how everyone would say they care about the homeless and believe they do, but how many of them would actually do something to help?

nemma88 · 2022-10-03T14:57:13+00:00

When looking for a partner women value many things and each are weighed against the other, additionally some women will place more value in one area that another woman doesn't care for. Height Vs money alternatively means money isn't being selected for much, which makes sense in 2022 and contrary to point 3.

Approximately 38% of wives earn more than their husbands, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

One of the talking points here is the deminished provider role for men they were seemingly comfortable in.

And none of the post addresses height, looks and money Vs personality. Yeah everyone knows jerks. And short men. And ugly men. And broke men. In relationships.

Edit; Most people have something going for them, play to your strengths.

Demasii · 2022-10-03T14:59:38+00:00

There is motivation for being dishonest.

Women putting their standards out there unless it's the PC answer opens themselves up for criticism.

This is cliche but I been criticized for rejecting men because I should "give him a chance" and "he is a nice guy".

I also been criticized for not knowing what my standards were and had conversations like this below.

"So what do you look for in a man?"

"I don't know. It depends. I just know it when I interact with him."

"Oh so you don't know what you want?" in a condescending manner.

Made me avoid answering questions to begin with.

toasterchild · 2022-10-03T15:31:19+00:00

I will never be able to comprehend how many men want everything to always be totally black and white. Mind blowing how you can make it to adulthood and see no nuance in anything. If course you think women lie because you think we are a humogeneous blob.

RocinanteCoffee · 2022-10-03T17:57:57+00:00

The most popularly referenced dating app data regarding height is only from premium users/paid users which are less than 10% of women on the app, so all it says is that 90% of women on the app don't care enough about height to pay for the app subscription.

Do some women care about height, absolutely. But most men in the US are 5'7" or 5'9" and yet almost all of them get laid, have dates, and even marriages to people who are attracted to them (at least initially).

Are looks important generally? Sure most people (regardless of gender) are not going to try to date/accept a date from someone they're not attracted to unless in an arranged marriage or sugar relationship.

Also are all preferences created equally? No. Some of those women who prefer a taller guy will have a guy with a six-pack beat out the tall guy every time. Some would have a guy with great hair beat out a guy with a six pack every time.

And then you have people like me who find pretty much every height hot and have a variety of body types that drive me wild.

Ultimately, every gender should exclusively go for who they are attracted to, and not pretend to be attracted to someone they are not out of some sense of charity, or warped sense of moral obligation.

98% of people (US) will have sex, dates, relationships in their lifetimes, almost all of those begin with mutual physical attraction except for sugar relationships and arranged marriages which fall well into the minority.

So many average or below average looking short couples out there, hopelessly in lust or love with each other, going to the movies, raising families, and having experiences with sex and with love.

Mind125 · 2022-10-03T15:02:52+00:00

Isn’t this evolution in play? Future babies will all be taller and/or rich.

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2022-10-03T20:56:01+00:00

Can you explain the “not feasible” in the women's column from 5’10” to 6’8”? Does that mean that there weren’t enough women of that height in this study? Does that mean that her income simply can’t compensate for the insecurity men would feel about being with a tall or taller woman? After all, a 5’5” woman can earn $43,000 below the median to still be considered as attractive.

darkvalleys · 2022-10-03T17:43:26+00:00

“I don’t want women to think men care about their opinions”, post #5,443, “we’re totally NOT listening to you, okay!? Your desires mean nothing!”

richard_golbes · 2022-10-03T16:49:18+00:00

Seldom will a woman date a guy who isn't making at least as much as her. And I'd say at this point most women want a guy want a guy at least cracking 6 figures.

This is so delusional. It's like saying most people want to win the lottery. Sure. But the reality is that the median income is ~50k. So regardless of women may want, most are dating and marrying guys who make much, much less than 100k.

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-10-03T16:16:12+00:00

Here's the thing, people generally find other people attractive on a subconcious level. They find a person attractive and that's it. They don't analyse why they find a person attractive, unless it's something out of the ordinary for them or somebody asks them.

So people gnerally have no clue what exactly they find atractive about the person and then they imagine a person they find attractive and then try to thing what they do find attractive. And it's not that easyto untangle the separate features from the tangled bundle as a whole (You could say you find the eyes attractive, but you wouldn't find the same eyes attractive on a different face as apparently you find the eyes attractive how they look on that specific face). And as you generally know sme of the people you find attractive as you might have interacted with them, then the personality features are also added to the equation.

Example. I find these men (most of them are fictional) attractive for looks alone. I can'texactly tell you what exactly is attractive to me on them. Maybe facial roughness/gruffness. The features that I could identify might be wavy hair, thick/bushy eyebrows, dark eyes, but as you can see, not all men on the link have those features.

bunnakay · 2022-10-03T16:28:41+00:00

If you think all women are lying, why are you still trying to date them?

Myamoxomis · 2022-10-03T21:41:36+00:00

This is dumb as fuck lol.

s0ngsforthedeaf · 2022-10-03T19:24:48+00:00

Being emotionally vulnerable: There is no single quicker way for a woman to lose attraction and respect for you than being "vulnerable" with her. And it should go without saying, but I'm not talking about trauma dumping on some girl you just met a week ago. I'm talking about expressing actual vulnerabilities in a relationship. Without fail every time this topic comes up there are a million anecdotes from men who found this out the hard way.

God damn. This is how you guys really think? This is your experience?

I'm from a middle class background, my friends are pretty happy and healthy and mature people. Also I'm British and I don't think our culture is quite as insane/competitive/cynical etc as America, etc.

With all that said, I don't know a single long term relationship where the couples haven't opened up to each other. And built bridges through that.

If you've genuinely opened up to women you trusted before, and had it slapped in in face every time, then I'm sorry. You've met some bad people.

But don't get it wrong - healthy relationships do exist. You can be vulnerable and find someone who wants you. Vulnerability is honesty, we are all vulnerable in some ways.

What a world. There feels like a massive divide between the red pill posts that come up and the world that I experience. I don't think all the men upvoting you even believe this.

InfamousBake1859 · 2022-10-03T21:38:19+00:00

You make one flawed conclusion. This is based on surveys that basically ask women to only evaluation someone based on height and income… basicaly nothing else.

But hopefully you are more than just height and income.

Also another table in that study showed if you were asian, you need to make 247k more. So is it really just height?

Flightlessbirbz · 2022-10-03T15:50:24+00:00

In the past, women didn’t really have a platform for expressing their preferences and faced dire consequences for saying the wrong things and offending the wrong man. Today, women are actually pretty honest, but men have a habit of only hearing what they want to hear and freaking out when they hear something they don’t like.

If you want an LTR you have to be emotionally vulnerable sometimes. But I am really starting to think a lot of men don’t know what that means and don’t realize how strange they are acting when they think they’re being “vulnerable.” My boyfriend often seems straight up angry with me when he’s sad or stressed about something. So of course I will not react well to that, despite the fact I genuinely want to support him. This is something we’ve had to talk about and work through.

ruboyuri · 2022-10-03T14:21:28+00:00

Weirdly, why are most people in relationships then ?

AnActualPerson · 2022-10-03T14:55:43+00:00

Bring vulnerable with a partner is fine. Freaking out and trauma dumping on them is not.

geometersbane · 2022-10-03T14:36:28+00:00

Duh. Women are all about optics.

darktriadanon · 2022-10-03T15:31:04+00:00

Personality is exactly as important as we think it is, men just don't know what women mean by having a "personality." They think we mean random hobbies or something like that.

darkmauveshore · 2022-10-03T21:39:55+00:00

An astute and precise summary of why men are so confused all the time. At least, the men who haven't figured wahmen out yet. It's not really that surprising if you just stop listening to what all the people say and think about it logically. If you are a man and look at a wahmen, for me at least, height is important. I want her short...usually shorter means curvier and that's a big plus. But also, short wahmen are just so cute. Like 5'0-5'5" is perfect. Also, I want wahmen to be attractive. Yes it's super important, ngl. They have to be financially competent as well. And emotions: I don't want her to sit here and talk to me like I'm one of her girlfirends or friend zoned guys, so I react stoicly most of the time. If I need to talk about my emotions, that's what my bros and some beer are for. It all checks out from both angles, but I think people get too caught up with what all the idiot self-help guru's say and take dating advice from women. BAD IDEA! You are not wahmen. Take dating advice from man.

Academic_Snow_7680 · 2022-10-03T18:55:29+00:00

All that copy just to show us that you don't know women at all.

Instead of writing long essays on what you think is the case you should try looking at the data.

ploppercan2 · 2022-10-03T14:45:47+00:00

Water is wet

2022-10-04T00:43:23+00:00

I agree but I think "game" is bs. Most of those pickup artists you see online are scammers just trying to get you to pay for their online course. They don't actually have "game" they just fake interactions and pay people and lie about shit all the time.

The only real game is being socially aware and being able to hold a normal conversation and pick up on social cues without offending someone or screwing it up when talking to women. This so called game can't make up for much looks wise but if you aren't good at interacting with women it can totally ruin your chances. Being able to flirt comes naturally if you're both attracted to each other.

Pick up tricks and stupid stuff these pick up artists will try to teach you are bs and using some already picked out lines from ur memory when talking to women doesn't do anything.

The_Legatus · 2022-10-04T00:47:05+00:00

So…where does the “data” on this chart come from? What was the sample size and what were the questions asked? Also why does this chart use 63k and 43k for each of the genders? I’m pretty sure that’s somewhere in the ballpark of the national average income for both genders, but it doesn’t control for race, ethnicity, age, or education level. For example, men in their 20’s making 63k per year are actually performing well above their peers in their earnings on average. A black man in his 20’s making that much is even more ahead of his peers. There’s also a difference in the importance of height amongst a lot of women, especially if you control for those same factors. Many women over the age of 25 don’t care nearly as much about height as women 18-24. In my own experience, many asian and/or latin-American women also seem to care less about height and more about other factors. And the amount of women that really do care about height to a deal-breaking extent certainly wasn’t enough to stop me (5’7) from having a very fruitful dating life in my late teens and early 20’s, when I was in college and not making much money. Was it an obstacle with some women? Sure, but some women’s body fat and/or racial characteristics (I’m not typically as attracted to white women as I am to minority women) was an obstacle with me, so fair is fair, right?

Also, why is 5’8 “not feasible” for a woman? I’ve dated and had casual/friendly sexual encounters with women who were 5’8 and taller. Are you denying their existence? Because they are certainly real. If you think not, I’d advise you to get off the internet and meet some women. If you think they all care ridiculously about a man’s height, I’d advise you to put a charismatic short man in front of them and see what happens.

TheMedsPeds · 2022-10-04T01:42:46+00:00

Are women shallow? Yes. But compared to men? We are the less shallow of the two sexes.

TheMedsPeds · 2022-10-04T02:12:57+00:00

So you gathered the data of women who specifically pay for the ability to filter matches for these sort of things then surprise Pikachu face when those women are very specifically picky.

Bonus points because you are intentionally ignoring the majority of women who just use the app regularly AND the even larger group of social, at least semi attractive women and up who just don’t even bother to have OLD (and yes there are millions and millions of women that date and fuck without the use of OLD, it’s called being a normal outgoing person with a social life lol.)

Long story short. Gonna need a better selection of women for me to see this in any other way that isn’t “cherry picked stats that justify some nerds loneliness”

sugarJackal · 2022-10-04T02:32:26+00:00

Tbh a guy who is a stay-at-home dad and can keep up in the sack is perfect. And I hope he likes to eat cos I like to cook. If he is passionate about music, that's important too. Big and hairy is the best, physically, but a guy my size or smaller that I can manhandle (in a good way I swear) is also nice. If you want honesty, someone I can spend my life in peace with is what really matters. I don't think women are dishonest about what they're attracted to, but I think when they mature they realize what's really important (having fun, keeping romance alive, being good parents, etc).

blockboii190 · 2022-10-04T05:27:25+00:00

Both sexs lie

medlabunicorn · 2022-10-04T06:09:27+00:00

Your data does not support most of your claims, and when the ratio of men to women on dating apps is 90:10, of course only the top 10% of men would be responded to.

caption291 · 2022-10-04T06:09:59+00:00

I preffered when the redpill was about figuring out what men should do as a group to tip back the social and dating scale more than the current pua version where it's all about how an individual man can marginally increase his dating chances while throwing men as a whole under the bus whenever advantageous.

I'd argue the modern PUA version of the redpill helps women have higher and higher standards because it tells men that if there is a problem it's always their individual fault so they should always aim to "improve" themselves rather than the system.

The "red" pill(which should really be called the pua pill) has for the most part forgotten about men's treatment in society but I think a good example of why "just improve bro" is such a nonsensical mindset when you think about it.

As anyone that is even remotely red pill and not just a pua cosplaying as redpill would know: The justice system is extremely unfair to men.

The old redpill had a problem with that and wanted to fix the justice system to be fairer to men. The pua pill if it still cared about social problems would be telling men to stop complaining about the unfair justice system because that's victim mentality.

I don't think as many men are attracted to the "Everything is your fault even when it clearly isn't and you should just endlessly work and suffer at women's whim because you're not a simp" narrative as the redpill thinks. It's mostly the underlying truth about women that's attractive...what the pua pill suggests you do is not.

I think the main purpose of unreasonable "accountability" is to shut down the inevitable argument that women make which is that a dude's lack of success in dating is the result of him not putting in effort. If men are holding themselves accountable for things they clearly have no control over...then ironically the system must be what's broken rather than the men. It's obviously a super exploitable strategy as it's essentially the blue pill strategy lol.

cryptographicbot · 2022-10-04T06:42:51+00:00

If you ask someone those questions, statistically, they will prob answer similarly but in reality it’s very different. All sorts of broke and ugly men are married

GimiderKing · 2022-10-04T09:12:27+00:00

I agree with most of the things you said but in real life many women date or marry average guys. Even goodlooking girls seem to date dudes who look average

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2022-10-04T23:00:08+00:00

I cannot agree with #2 and do not really see point of stating it, it can be removed entirely the post. The entirety of a male except for his genitals is personality. It has genetic, biological, physiological components. Bad personality in this context means unattractive, not anything ethical or moral. Men with 'bad personalities' are called women. It cannot be 'overstated' in a way that ever hurts, because you must draw reference from specific traits or forms of conduct, unless you are talking about a man 'shrinking himself' to attract women, which is not 'shrinking of his personality', but an alteration toward trait or conduct within it.

If a man is actually shrinking his 'bad personality' to increase the impacts of personality traits and conduct on women to net positive results, then claiming 'personality is overstated' is self-refuting to me. Even in the context of the "Halo Effect" in which you linked; being affected by physical attractiveness is problematic not because of the physicality, but of the biases that come about from to the perception of positive 'personality traits' being inflicted on the observee, which influenced the observers conduct, value judgments and social competency all linked to personality. I do not see how personality is overestimated because of these facts; that even the Halo Effect demonstrates a sin qua non link to looks and personality, that shows it cannot be overestimated when discussing opposite sex attraction.

_______

#3 to me is not a good example of dishonesty; it is more of a gender neutral ignorance problem. It could be complete removed for this fact. It more so speaks to women (and men's) lack of financial intelligence and overall not being business savvy. That is why they fixate on 'gross income' in that moment and nothing else. These women are mostly harmless and not an issue for any man with money. Women that truly love money and men with money have money first, honey. They are either three things: mathematicians, businesswomen, or gold diggers. An example, one of the sweetest women I know used to work WallStreet as a trader at Morgan Stanley and Goldman Sachs with a math degree that made $$$. She's is money hungry and crunches numbers.

When I hear a woman say I want a man that makes 100k+ a year or a man that boosts about his 100k+ figure income, it is my experience these people are broke; even worse in the Urban cities. And you can be broke making 6 figures, honey. I know a two broke lower-end millionaires. Let that sink in.

The more educate people are about wealth, how it is made and sustained I see shift in how women vet men and men that are genuinely not broke with humble moves and keep it tight. My bestie only dates rich men and is adamant about it, a total airhead honey about everything except money, beautiful and shallow, loaded with plastic, a cliche. I love her to death, but she is a certified gold digger, but one thing not lacking in her is her financial intelligence and literacy that is off the charts as well as as well as her self-made above average net worth without showing a single titty. The men she targets and selects for are not the men most women looking for men with high income are. Framing #3 as a 'woman problem' or having anything to do with this sub or dating is bizarre to me.

I do not follow the conclusion of your post, overall. It could be a logical in that it is a reaction to an negative event but doesn't say much of anything else, it is just an irrational emotional reaction that logically follows from feelings and emotions of hurt or betrayal. Are you arguing emotional distress? It is all over the place for me personally. Is it some kind of ethical thing?

dmttao · 2022-10-05T06:28:07+00:00

I have a question springing from this. Okay, so if true - ie women are dishonest with themselves/others about the importance of looks etc.

Does this in your view apply equally the other way around. Am I living in denial how vastly important looks of a woman are for men? (Obviously I am aware they’re very important and a lot of guys will only care about that).

But is it even worse than I’m thinking, is that what you’re trying say here? And, I also want to ask - what are the importance of a woman’s looks for men then?

As in, just mate choice? Who they will marry? How much they will love them? Whether they can get a boner? What are the differences, and how big is this discrepancy in your view?

Wqtr100 · 2022-10-07T18:29:10+00:00

When it comes to height, a lot of women perpetuate the myth that most women just want someone taller. The average woman in the US is ~5'4, meaning 5'5+ so we obviously know that is complete and utter non-sense.

It is crazy that women even try to deny it. The average woman in both the US and the UK is 5'4" - which means that a man who is 5'5" should be tall enough for her. But he is not. Nor is the guy who is 5'6". The vast majority of women will never date a man who is that short. They still want someone who is at least 5'9" or 5'10" and preferably 6 feet tall.

Personality: The importance of personality is extremely overestimated.

True. Height, looks, fitness, penis size and income are far more important to women than his personality.

Being emotionally vulnerable: There is no single quicker way for a woman to lose attraction and respect for you than being "vulnerable" with her. And it should go without saying, but I'm not talking about trauma dumping on some girl you just met a week ago. I'm talking about expressing actual vulnerabilities in a relationship. Without fail every time this topic comes up there are a million anecdotes from men who found this out the hard way. Men opening up is a topic a lot of people virtue signal about, but if you are a guy whether you like it or not not you will always be expected to be stoic and take the struggles life throws at you in stride.

True. Men should never open up to a woman. Women even call it "emotional labor" when they have to hear their boyfriend/husband open up. And then women have the nerve to call themselves "emotionally intelligent", lmao.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-10-03T20:25:59+00:00

What an old sexist rhetoric. Women are allowed to want whatever they want, and so are men, and both are allowed to change their minds at any time. Don’t get bitter about it.

MGTOW_FIR3 · 2022-10-03T16:09:16+00:00

Sometimes it feels women lie to themselves. I've heard someone say somewhere "act by how a women behaves not what she says" or something along the lines of that, but you get the point

4ktx · 2022-10-04T00:18:10+00:00

Doesn’t matter what they want, they will settle regardless

gofigure62 · 2022-10-03T15:08:43+00:00

Men just hear what they want to hear and are pissed off that they don't meet the standards and expectations of women that they're most attracted to.

There are women that don't care about looks, but the reality is that most men probably aren't attracted to this kind of woman.

There are women that care more about personality, but the reality is that most men probably don't have a personality to fit the requirements of women that find personality attractive. A significant amount of men don't have a personality, they're NPC's.

Poor women exist. Go to a trailer park or 3rd world country if you don't want your money to matter. Once again, women aren't "lying" you're just ignoring the women who don't give a shit about money as dating option.

Most men have NO idea what emotional vulnerability means. They often equate it to trauma dumping and substituting women as their therapists and emotional regulators. Speaking to the average man about emotional intelligence, is like trying to explain physics to an embryo. Men are so underdeveloped with social and emotional intelligence that it's often an absolute waste of time having any kind of discourse regarding it.

Women aren't lying about what they're attracted to. Men just aren't attracted to the women who say these things. Men are only attracted to women whose standards that they don't meet.

vogel777 · 2022-10-03T16:07:45+00:00

Most women are not on dating apps so you undermine your whole argument by suggesting dating app data is indicative of what women in gender prefer.

Your post is nothing but a list of personal grievances and insecurities. Rather than take responsibility for your own short comings like a shitty personality, halitosis or just generally being an uninteresting person men find it easier to create a fairy story about how evil and duplicitous women are to explain their own failures away i.e. I’m such a great guy but women aren’t interested in me because I’m short, don’t look like Chad etc. However behold all the average or even below, under 6 foot guys with wives or girlfriends everywhere (most people are just average, most people couple up), hey some of them are even poor!

Now how do you explain that? Either you are only pursuing women who have no interest in you ( perhaps due to a distorted image of what the average woman looks like because of porn and social media use), that’s fine everyone can have whatever standards they like but obviously you can’t force reciprocation. Alternatively mem who fail to find partners even if they want them are perhaps just not trying very hard or have some personality defect they are blind to or unprepared to face up to. Either way it’s a problem of your own making.

Il128 · 2022-10-03T15:12:40+00:00

Nuance is key.
It's not a this or a that specific kind of thing you're talking about. You're generalizing based on your own personal weaknesses and then blaming the nuance for your problems.

Women want security, validation, and entertainment from their relationships. Guess what? So do men.

NewWayNow · 2022-10-03T15:15:43+00:00

So if you’re 6’6” or taller, they’re willing to pay you.

Do-it-for-you · 2022-10-03T15:50:54+00:00

Everything here is true BUT the bumble height filter.

That % is specifically from women who are using bumble and have paid a membership on it to gain access to the filters. You have to take into account the type of woman willing to pay a premium membership on a OLD app. It’s going to skew towards rich women and women desperate for the height filter.

poppy_blu · 2022-10-03T18:05:57+00:00

So basically you just listed all the things that are or are not important to you as a man (what you want to be wanted by women for), and whatever doesn’t sync up with reality is explained away by wImMinZ liEz. How convenient.

retal1ator · 2022-10-03T18:00:56+00:00

If you’re 6 feet 6 inches or above you can basically be a hobo and you’ll still slay. Cool.

vertr · 2022-10-03T18:05:35+00:00

Anybody notice how OP posts these rants about the things they dislike about women several times a week? Of course all of the problems are women's fault. Typical. Does that seem healthy to everyone? I thought RP was about getting your shit together, not behaving constantly triggered in public. Yet another example of a man who doesn't like how women communicate and that they essentially want to date men in women's bodies.

mightymorphinnyla · 2022-10-03T18:39:41+00:00

If you’re not asexual, then you’ll want to have some sort of sexual attraction to the person you’re entering a relationship with. I always thought that was a given when discussing dating so I don’t ever give that as a disclaimer.

Secondly, have you considered that these rules of attractiveness in women (and men) may be full of unconscious biases? Internalized stereotypes and prejudices?

It’s something people bring up all the time when we discuss workplace issues. It’s also discussed when it comes to dating issues for Asian men and black women, but it’s not talked about as much when it comes to attraction in general.

How often does anyone sit back and ponder on why they find someone attractive? People just go through life thinking “well, that’s just my preference”.

I realize some women blatantly lie to save face. I can’t imagine that all women are so nefarious that they lie to everyone just so they can gas-light men and leave them confused.

risdeveau · 2022-10-03T14:23:47+00:00

If that’s so, why are the vast majority of people who want a relationship in one?

https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/

ThouWontThrowaway · 2022-10-03T18:13:00+00:00

They're going to ban you for telling the truth lol. Excellent post.

2022-10-03T15:30:57+00:00

Yes they are but the same time society and other mens are; nobody will tells we the truth because society was build on this lie, men are know to live with so feel things and yet they're the one paying most of the taxes.

You're lied from the moment you've been born into thinking that the world is fair because otherwise you won't participate on it, they need you to participate on it.

FancyCocktailOlive · 2022-10-03T17:26:19+00:00

Don’t look for women on OLD apps.

What women—and men—like on apps is very different to what we like in real life.

On an app, I’d definitely only swipe on the tallest, best looking men with the best careers but IRL you can meet a guy in person who is shorter, less educated, not six figures in salary and think “hey this guy is pretty damn sexy and amazing.”

Get off the Internet, get outside.

modidlee · 2022-10-03T18:41:34+00:00

I agree with this besides personality. I think guys think of “personality” differently than women. Guys think being “nice” and “friendly” are good personality traits. But the women I’ve dated that said they love my personality would also say I’m an “arrogant jerk, asshole, etc.” But also “funny, weird/quirky,” and interesting to be around. That’s what women want when they talk about “personality.” The feeling that the person is actually unique, even if he is a “jerk.”

Sharpeye1994 · 2022-10-03T15:50:56+00:00

These studies seem incredibly biased to me… the factors listed are certainly not every possible factor that may contribute to attraction… and thats the problem with trying to prove red pill ‘scientifically’.. while this may be useful information theres plenty unaccounted for.

YtBlue · 2022-10-03T15:50:03+00:00

They're not dishonest just different communicators. They communicate in a contextual realm and men are straight forward. A man will say what he says and mean it in a literal sense. For example women state they like financial secure men. Men will take that at face value and think okay she wants like 50k a year. But in the context of what she says she wants power and security. Anything societal or natural born that reflects power a woman wants.

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40750-015-0021-9

Palagonius · 2022-10-03T14:52:42+00:00

Absolutely. How many times I've been told I have an amazing personality, yet the girl refuses to give me even a first date.

Who you are doesn't matter. Just what you have and how you look unfortunately.

INFPSoloDuh · 2022-10-03T16:39:14+00:00

I've been downvoted into the shadow realm by bringing this up. It is what it is man. They hot the wall eventually.

Gilmoregirlin · 2022-10-03T17:13:52+00:00

Of course looks matter to women. The difference is that not all women find the same kind of looks attractive and I think that's where men get tripped up. I always say that even though men have their own tastes generally men come in around the same if asked to rate a woman's attractiveness. Women are not like that except when it comes to 10s, anything below that women are all over the place. And in the long term looks fade, and personality is more important. Women also can not initially be super attracted to a guy on a physical basis but become more attracted to him after getting to know him, which does not seem to happen as much with men. Emotional vulnerability is attractive, dumping all of your mental health issues on a woman on the 2nd or 3rd date is not. Having untreated mental illness is not. I think that a lot of men misunderstand what this means. Emotional vulnerability should not be coming early in the relationship, if it does that's a massive red flag. This is something that takes time. Income and status is important to women but for most women, like myself, it's only because men making less than me felt insecure and it caused huge issues in the relationship.

greedyleopard42 · 2022-10-03T19:50:52+00:00

online dating shouldn’t be dismissed, but it should mainly be used as a measure of how online dating works- it’s not exactly the same irl. dating apps are superficial in nature. you don’t get to see as much of someone’s personality from one so you’re going to go based more off of looks as a rule.

dottywine · 2022-10-04T13:49:01+00:00

I think tallness is universally understood to be desirable, especially for women seeking a mate, which this graph shows. Even men have less respect for short men for example, in a leadership position.

The bar for income is low. The study assumes the average woman makes 40k and the average dude makes 60k. So if you’re making less than women who already earn less than men — obviously that’s not desirable.

bluebike92 · 2022-10-05T02:47:34+00:00

As a woman I (25F) would like to respond to some of the points you’ve made, Granted I can only speak for myself and not all women.

Physical appearance: You’re not wrong, physical appearance definitely has an impact, however everyone I know has different preferences and opinions on what they consider to be attractive. For example some people care more about body shape, and some care more about facial features. When it comes to body shape I know people who are into the traditional muscular build, the skinny/scrawny type, or the “dad bod”. Also when it comes to dating apps there’s more that goes into swiping on someone besides looks. Like are all of their pics group photos and you can’t even tell which guy he is. Is he posing holding a fish, etc. There are other takeaways you can get from pics alone, but then there's also the bio to take into account too. Do they seem interesting or bland. There’s definitely a double standard. I feel a lot of guys say this kind of thing, but at the same time will easily pass on any woman they don't find attractive

Personality: You make good points and I have nothing to add.

Income and Status: You’re correct most women I know want someone that’s at least making as much as her. I wouldn't go as far as saying that means 6 figures though. 5 figures is more likely especially given the fact most women in my age range make somewhere around 30-50k.

Being emotionally vulnerable: I personally don’t agree with you on this one. Most women I know really appreciate it when men are emotionally vulnerable with them (some I know even say it’s a turn on for them). Women love guys who are in tune with their emotions. What women DON’T like however is being your therapist. We will listen and support you however we can, but we cannot fix your issues and it is unrealistic to only burden your potential partner with your problems. Please talk to multiple people and maybe even a therapist about whatever is going on. Women are treated as if their presence will magically make things better and that's a lot of pressure and an unrealistic expectation. Being vulnerable is different from being an emotional vampire.

Title	Women are dishonest about what they are attracted to in men
Author	HazyMemory7
Upvotes	391
Comments	482
Date	October 3, 2022 2:15 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/xuknzk/women_are_dishonest_about_what_they_are_attracted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-are-dishonest-about-what-they-are-attracted.1135265 https://theredarchive.com/post/1135265