Don't focus too hard on the exact wording of "undateable mess." There are a lot more colourful words I could use, but just chose not to.

Anyhow, it's very common to hear the term "The bar is on the floor" when women discuss men. Not only online, but even if you overhear women talking at a cafe or a bar, with their friends, what they often talk about is how men don't put in the effort, can't uphold a conversation etc etc.

And they're not wrong. The average bloke is pretty embarrassing. There are quite a few guys who are perfectly fine. Not great, not super special, but still fine. But there are also tons of guys who are complete trainwrecks. In my experience, other guys tend not to notice those complete human wrecks because they don't really act that way towards or around other guys. But check a girls inbox on Tinder, or travel with a female friend in a less "liberal" country and you'll be amazed at how incredibly frequent poor behaviour and social incompetence is.

That said, the major mistake women make is believing that the average woman is somehow not an undateable, human trainwreck. I've lived a pretty promiscious life, but I would consider less than 5% of the woman I've dated for a relationship. Women complain about men not putting in the effort, but few women are actually worth putting effort into. The average woman is just as insecure and boring as the average guy. They tend to be more socially competent, but they instead fall short in being excruciatingly boring and basic.

Women are not wrong for wanting the average guy to not be a complete wanker, and put in some effort. But they do need to be a person that is worth putting in effort and self improvement for.

I have met plenty of women complaining about the quality of men. None of them have been women I would even remotely consider worth dating.