Women still have an easier time finding dates/relationships (on average) in their 30s+ vs their male counterparts.

CollapseEnjoyer · 2021-12-06T16:54:42+00:00

Women will always have an easier time dating even in their 30s. It's just in their 30s they won't be able to attract the same type of man they would have when they were younger

Extracrispyrooster · 2021-12-06T16:19:52+00:00

Women across all ages will always have men sniffing around. Wall is a big cope. Their standards are the only reason they might be "single".

SwinginPastMyKnees_ · 2021-12-06T17:08:30+00:00

The wall doesn't mean that women become undatable at 30+. It just means that they will have a more difficult time finding relationships compared to when they were younger. It's that point in time where the attractive men start considering younger women for relationships, leaving older women with fewer and less attractive options for commitment/marriage.

You alluded to it yourself. A man who puts himself in the top 10-20% of all men has his options open. And since men are the gatekeepers of relationships, he can find an attractive and suitable LTR partner from his increased options.

A woman who puts herself in the top 10-20% of income doesn't have an increase of options. Most likely she'll want commitment from her equivalent 10-20% man, so her pool is more narrow. She CAN date the broke hot guy, but she won't want to get commitment from him.

Since a lot of women want that same 10-20% man, he's more likely to go with the more attractive option, which may be a woman who is higher in looks and/or younger. Hence, the wall.

razormachine · 2021-12-06T16:54:14+00:00

The average man in his 30s-40s is overweight, balding, and making around 40k a year.

A woman in her 30s-40s who maintains her body, style, and employment with a kind personality on top.

Maybe not compare an average man with rare high value women? Because...

Average single woman in her 30s-40s is overweight, has a crappy personality and comes with these sweet packages called "someone's else kids".

A man in his 30-40's who lifts, has a billion dollars on his account and is 7ft tall doesn't have a problem dating 20yo's.

Oli_love90 · 2021-12-06T17:47:43+00:00

As a woman - It’s so weird to me that 30 is the perceived wall of attractiveness when it’s not even that old. You don’t have wrinkles, your body is still cute and you’re a little more sure of yourself.

I feel like this myth is just perpetuated by young people who think 30 is old.

NockerJoe · 2021-12-06T15:55:43+00:00

I'm not 30 yet and I'm speaking wholly anecdotally but even late vs early 20's is a very different game. I don't think that a statistically average 30 year old man has a harem or is living it up but basicslly any dude I know who puts in effort gets more than they did in college and most of the women I know in their 30's aren't exactly surrounded by simps or blowing up social media.

A big part of this is once you hit your mid to late 20's you're fully out of the college environment where awkward younger dudes in large numbers aren't as abundant and accessible, nor are hot student athletes who congregate in a few well known places. Those guys scatter to the four winds and their female equivalents won't really meet them organically unless they have the same workplace/hobbies/hangout spots. It really can't be the same guys because nobody is in the same spots anymore.

sarkington · 2021-12-06T16:11:17+00:00

Nah. Men don’t care about female experiences, wealth or accomplishments, which are the main advantages of aging

Liberal_On_Guns · 2021-12-06T16:25:11+00:00

It's not revenge fantasy and I don't think it reflects the point of view.

Women still have an easier time finding dates/relationships (on average) in their 30s+ vs their male counterparts.

True. Facts. Indisputable. Perhaps RP is hyperbolic. And perhaps doomers are just haters. It is reddit, after all.

But you will see the same dudes assert that an average girl is still going to have more options than a HVM. It's just the nature of the beast.

The truth is that men peak at a later age than women. It doesn't necessarily mean, as the feminists will spin, that a 40+ year old guy is going to have 20 year olds begging to suck his dick. He is never going to match the options of the majority of women. All we mean to say, is that if you are a guy, you will be better off at 30-35 (if you take care of yourself) than 20-25.

All we mean to say to women, is that you will be worse off at 30-35, than 20-25. It doesn't mean the tables completely flip, or that older guys are swimming in pussy. You guys seem to read that into RP arguments because it's easier to refute.

If you actually believe that 30-35 year old guys are worse off than their younger counterparts, you are just saying shit to be disagreeable. The data has been posted a ton.

BlackGriffin_1 · 2021-12-06T15:42:09+00:00

The wall just means women can't have what they want not that they can't have anything at all

mbrseb · 2021-12-06T16:12:41+00:00

This is data from Okcupid. I know that it is pretty unpopular but it is sadly also the truth https://incels.wiki/images/thumb/8/81/Desirability_of_men_vs_women_by_age.PNG/400px-Desirability_of_men_vs_women_by_age.PNG

oldcamembert · 2021-12-06T16:34:18+00:00

Hey, stop exaggerating, I have only 2 cats!

Seriously now, it is certainly more difficult now for me in mid-late 30s compared to 20s. Surprisingly, also more rewarding - yes, you need to put some efforts in, but there's also that sweet feeling of accomplishment when it pays back.

Contrary to the OP, I think less attractive women are actually doing (comparably) better post wall compared to their "hot" peers - assuming we are discussing relationships, and not hookups. Looks fade equally for both categories, but the former is also used to bringing more to the table than just looks.

mbrseb · 2021-12-06T17:17:26+00:00

I know that this opinion is super unpopular and nobody wants to be mean to older women who are definitely as capable as man at age 30+, but there is a biological hard boundary that cannot be ignored. Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Kaspersky and Einstein were all born by mothers under 27. Jeff Bezos mom was 17 when she gave birth to him.

Advanced maternal age leads to shorter offspring life expectancy (Lansing effect in biology) and also lower IQ (if you do not adjust for the wealth of the mother(which you do not need if you are a rich guy))

So rich guys (given they have a bit of empathy for their future children) will always pick a young, (below 30) mother since they want the healthiest children possible

TheSnowyPlover · 2021-12-06T18:00:05+00:00

THE WALL

What it is: A woman’s internal realization that she can no longer compete for men in the sexual marketplace like she could when she was younger, hotter, tighter.

What it is not: Women automatically become less attractive/desirable when they hit some arbitrary age

manfrom-nantucket · 2021-12-06T16:03:13+00:00

Most women ultimately want relationships, commitment and marriage. It's easy for her to find dates, harder to get the guy to commit, once there it's harder to get to marriage. Older she is the harder this gets. Add a few kids to the equation it becomes impossible.

TryLambda · 2021-12-06T15:47:57+00:00

Have you looked at some post wall women, you'd swear they age 20yrs overnight!

tropicsGold · 2021-12-06T17:16:14+00:00

It isn’t like a switch gets thrown and a 30 year old woman is no longer desired, but there is definitely a huge swing at this point. A woman at 25 is at her peak and has the most options, but suddenly around 30 she finds the top guys she once ignored suddenly no longer want her, and she starts considering guys who she previously thought were beneath her.

This is not any form of revenge fantasy, it is a genuine warning to women for planning their lives. Lock down your top option around 25 because if you wait you may miss out.

A good example is a friend of mine who dated a HVM in her 20’s but never closed the deal. When he broke up with her as she approached 30, she is now being forced to consider guys WAY beneath the previous guy. She should have demanded a ring at 25 and left him if he would not commit, now she is in a tough spot, and having children at 35 is a lot tougher than 25.

NewWayNow · 2021-12-06T16:48:28+00:00

I agree with this for the most part.

There is one factor that does make dating harder for women as the years go on, and that is death rates. Males have a higher death rate at all ages than females, and that difference adds up over time. In the latter years, we men are thin on the ground.

FlicksterTrickster · 2021-12-06T17:14:55+00:00

Then why have “spinsters” been a meme for hundreds of years?

Reddit has its own hive of inspins: https://subredditstats.com/subreddit-user-overlaps/femaledatingstrategy

And this sub is very popular with them.

Teflon08191 · 2021-12-06T15:54:52+00:00

Their options don't diminish, but the quality of their options absolutely does.

Meaning the men that they want start wanting them less and less, leaving them in a position where they have to make more and more compromises.

Men have the option, albeit with a lot of work, to improve their options over time in a way that is not as true for women.

SonicBackScratcher · 2021-12-06T16:00:09+00:00

I'm 50, in good shape, and make very good money. I would have an insanely easy time single right now, being my target age woman would be mid-late 30's.

Proof? Well no one trusts me as a swinger in this, but I know guys less good looking, less money, who got divorced in their 40's and 50's and none of them downgraded, and none of them had a hard time. If anything these guys (most had been married since their 20's) had a revelation that there was a LOT more out there for them. A friend of mine who sucked with women, got married to a broken harpie, she left him in his late 40's and he literally had to turn off notifications on his dating profile to not be woken up by them, married a fantastic woman a few years later (who he didn't meet on line). And to show you how clueless he was he had no idea most women shaved (his didn't) these days. He was smart, he was successful, he was ugly.

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TodTheRod01 · 2021-12-06T17:09:08+00:00

You're definitely acknowledging some of the right things.

But forget that most women arent going for average men. Most women arent only going for chads, they also go for hvm that are often out of their league.

You're getting somethings right and then mixing or distorting other things.

SaBahRub · 2021-12-06T17:38:24+00:00

“The odds are good but the goods are odd”’ lol

Throwaway18077 · 2021-12-06T17:53:58+00:00

The only people who believe women have a hard time after 30 are men who have had a hard time all their lives and continue having a hard time.

The idea of women over 30 having it harder than men in the dating scene is a myth made up by men who are angry that women have the advantage.

Perseus_the_Bold · 2021-12-06T19:09:15+00:00

The explanation is very simple: Some women stay looking good well into their 30's and there is no shortage of simps and thirsty idiots willing to take sloppy seconds.

Also, 30 is a median number, a lot of women hit the wall as early as 20! Other women are vampires and just never age like Kate Beckinsale, Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Connelly, Cindy Crawford, Halle Berry, Jennifer Aniston, and Courney Cox.

A woman in her 30s-40s who maintains her body, style, and employment with a kind personality on top of that will have no shortage of suitors for dates or relationships.

She will most definitely have a shortage when those same suitors have armies of younger and more available and willing women that they can invest in.

This idea that most single women are crying every night with their 7 cats about how they can't find a man at 30 is, again, an RP revenge fantasy.

Hmm I agree. Women are not interested in men to begin with so this idea that they eat a tub of ice cream alone with their cats is very asinine. It will do men better to understand that women do not want them! Women are only ever interested in what men provide and not the man himself. Today women can get anything a man has without the man so all this poking and mocking at The Wall is just incel-cope. It is better for men to forget women and move on.

dysonRing · 2021-12-06T16:43:36+00:00

Lets just use fucking numbers

Alice is a 10 in her 20's she can get any man, she also takes care of herself so in her 30's she can get 9s, in her forties she can get 7-8s

That is the wall we are talking about, it is a huge huge psychological barrier to know you get less attention (see that Guardian feminist whining that she no longer gets male attention)

Wheras Bob in his 20's is a 6/10 man that CAN (but probably won't) go up with age, he could even reach the 10 spot and date new Alice in her 20's, that is a huge psychological relief.

Women here say that they don't find how older men age like fine wine, but to be fair they essentially argue that all men are unattractive, so the argument is poisoned. In short attraction when viewed holistically (ie wealth, experience, respect) goes up for men but down for women (ie looks), and even if Bob never matches Alice in her 30's but the time they are both 50 it is entirely possible that he does.

Post wall I rather be Bob, and I am lucky I am in the very high 9999 percentile which makes me feel better when dating 10s, If I had an ounce of insecurity I would probably be just a jealous mess.

Aldabruzzo · 2021-12-06T15:52:03+00:00

Lacks nuance.

Women's options lessen and decrease in quality after the wall.

A woman in her 30s and 40s can still get sex from Chad, and some suitors for relationships. But those men will be of lower quality.

A woman in her 30s and 40s who maintains her body, style, and employment with a kind personality on top of that will be able to have a lot of sex. But again - she can't get Chad. She will still end up settling for a beta bux. And she cries every night to her 7 cats about that - because she STILL has to settle for a beta bux if she wants a long term relationship.

thetruthishere_ · 2021-12-06T17:41:01+00:00

I had more men after me for just sex in my 20's. At 30+ more looking to actually date. The its so easy to find a good man in your 20's is baloney. LOL

There are good men at any age but dont think our 20's is just filled with men wanting to wife you up.

Now 50 I have no shortage of men chasing for just sex and dating. I have more wanting to date over sex. Its the 35 and under chasing that just want sex. I get it as we are not compatible for long term and it would be casual. I just dont go there as its not what I want.

DiabloTheDreamer · 2021-12-06T18:03:16+00:00

It does make me happy that 70% of these women will die alone with cats and dogs and friends and family and all that COPIUM. But lately i don't what to hate anymore.. :( i just want to be happy myself ....

Grappleheart · 2021-12-06T16:37:37+00:00

As men get older they make more money. They may also take better care of themselves physically. They also begin to learn about the tricks women play.

As women get older they become less attractive but also make more money. Men usually do not care about income.

So eventually women who are older will desire men who actually have money and the ability to take care of them. These men will have become more able to see the tricks women play and will have less time to play them. So women may have to chase after these better men.

On average men do not get better as they age physically. But women's physical standards drop as they get older. So it become more about money and personality. Older men have more personality because they have more experiences.

So in a way it is true. But also in a way it is false. I believe you are using the male gaze to judge female attraction.

PronKing10 · 2021-12-06T16:41:53+00:00

It should be less of a comparison thing by gender. The real focus from reading your post is that people who apply and invest in themselves have an easier time in the dating market as they get older, not just women.

Urbantexasguy · 2021-12-06T16:58:54+00:00

Things start to even up in online dating during the 30's, but it doesn't really become an even playing field, until late 40's or so.

According to this article, the crossover point for responses between men and women is around age 48.

https://www.eharmony.com/online-dating-statistics/

Still, dating has ALWAYS been more difficult and labor intensive for men than for women, that sort of goes without saying, but average men today, have it easier than men have EVER had it in the past, when it comes to sex and romance. Don't compare men to women, compare today's men with historical norms.

Average men today quite literally can get away with putting in maybe 20% of the effort required 30, 50 and certainly 100 years ago.

nick1812216 · 2021-12-06T17:10:35+00:00

I agree. People make it up, probably as a way to cope with rejection/dating failure.

“A 2010 OkCupid study on 200,000 of its male and female dating site users found that women are, except those during their early to mid-twenties, open to relationships with both somewhat older and somewhat younger men; they have a larger potential dating pool than men until age 26. At age 20, women, in a "dramatic change", begin sending private messages to significantly older men. At age 29, they become "even more open to older men". Male desirability to women peaks in the late 20s and does not fall below the average for all men until 36.[56]”

wikipedia source

I don’t think this validates the claim that 30 is some sort of ‘wall’ for women. I think it means that for men dating can get better. I agree with you women have an easier time finding dates/relationships throughout life. I think guys misinterpret their late in life increased dating success to validate the “women lose their dating market value at 30” claim, which is total bs!

mbrseb · 2021-12-06T17:25:43+00:00

For a guy having sex and for a woman finding a partner who stays with them is the hard thing. So finding a high value guy to date is not an accomplishment as a woman. Making a high value guy commit to provide resources to only her is the accomplishment.

Given that you are a high value guy, a woman with money is probably worthless if you are wealthy yourself while a mother that is able to raise the children (children who have caring mothers have in average 10 more IQ points) is really valuable since that is probably the only thing competitive people are bad at

xFallacyx69 · 2021-12-06T18:35:13+00:00

The wall isn’t about men vs women… it’s about women vs their younger selves. Women have an easier time finding mates than men… big deal it’s tough as fuck for most average men to get dates, so the bar is low. You’re just going from first place to a distant 2nd place, and average men are going from a distant third place to a close 3rd place, so they are finding dates easier than their former selves. That’s “the wall”

Im_The_Daiquiri_Man · 2021-12-06T18:43:11+00:00

Agree. This is the fact that is always left out of RP’s concept of “the wall” (one of the more cringey and copey RP terms)

A remotely attractive “post wall” woman still has far more options for sex and relationships than anything but a top 20% man.

Virtual-Jackfruit243 · 2021-12-06T19:03:48+00:00

Bingo. I said it in another comment, this is what misogynist men say to make themselves feel better.

For men, they need to have money to have options.

For women, they need to be pretty to have options.

You mean to tell me there's more 30 year old men with money then there is pretty 30 year old women? Cap.

Only about 9% or so make like 6 figures.

Willow-girl · 2021-12-06T19:47:22+00:00

A woman in her 30s-40s who maintains her body, style, and employment with a kind personality on top of that will have no shortage of suitors for dates or relationships.

It helps to be childfree. I have heard men say they would date particular women if it wasn't for their children (usually teenaged boys).

LotBuilder · 2021-12-06T19:48:23+00:00

Women will never run out of men willing to sleep with them, They just struggle to get attention or commitment from the men that they actually want after a certain age. That age is different for everyone because some women age very well

Whitewasabi69 · 2021-12-06T20:47:51+00:00

They have an easier time finding dates and hook ups always. Finding a quality guy to enter an actual relationship different story

Slyfer_Seven · 2021-12-06T21:00:12+00:00

Dating, yes. Finding a relationship (presumably you mean a good one), no.

If you're a guy in your 30's, that has his shit together, you can all but guarantee any chick who finds you attractive enough to date, will want to have a relationship with you and it will probably be a good one, if you put a little effort in. This is because, on average, women are built for relationships, so if you do your part, they'll do theirs...

Can 30+ yro women make a claim anywhere close to that?

yo_dwayne · 2021-12-06T22:37:54+00:00

Both women and men start to go downhill in their mid thirties, it’s not exclusive to women. Only difference is most of these red pill men have been sloppy since college so it’s already been bad for them 😂😂

ToughAnswers · 2021-12-06T16:04:32+00:00

revenge fantasy.

It happens, sure.

🤔

Username checks out

AbbreviationsHot1200 · 2021-12-06T18:24:07+00:00

Women have it easier in all aspects of life, at all stages of life.

DzejSiDi · 2021-12-06T18:37:59+00:00

You and many black/purple pilled people have serious reading comprehension problem.

The RP space seems to constantly spread the notion that women "hit the wall" around their 30s, where their options begin to run dry and they can no longer compete in the dating market for the "Chads" they attracted in their 20s.

That's a proper definition of the wall.

This idea that most single women are crying every night with their 7 cats about how they can't find a man at 30 is, again, an RP revenge fantasy.

And that's just your weak interpretation. This is a fantasy for many beta/nice/unsuccessful/whatever guys, but this is not what TRP states.

One more time: as you stated, when a woman "hit the wall" 1) her options begin to run dry 2) can no longer compete in the dating market for the "Chads" she managed to attract in her 20s.

That's it. After hitting a wall - she could turn into a cat lady or not - she could find love of her live or not - she could be even more successful than in her 20s, if she had some serious problems during that time, but resolved them and she takes care about herself - she could be happy or not - she could be still more attractive than average male her age

A 52 years old woman can easly posses higher SMV than a 22 yo blackpiller LDARing in parents' basement but this disproves wall in 0% because the wall was never a magic switch that turns hotties into femcels or something like that.

Banned_BY_SOYMEN · 2021-12-06T20:45:33+00:00

I've been making the first move as a woman, and I 100% recommend it to other women struggling with dating! Here's why:

So you're a woman at 26 who's not even 30, but you're seemingly struggling.

I'm not a fan of Rian Stone, but he made a great point in a tweet about a month ago, read something along the lines of:

Some women are hot because they're young, and some women are hot simply because they're hot

Most single women are extremely overweight and have many lifestyle issues. By the time women get through college, many have added a solid 30-40 pounds of fat and have been trained in misandrist education rituals.

So yes, if you're one of the few women who takes care of themselves in their 20s and doesn't get fat — yes, you will have plenty of options still.

As many have pointed out, comparing things to men's situations is a bit foolish. It's about how your (or women's in general) relative situation changes with age.

dres_sler · 2021-12-06T20:49:45+00:00

So nothing for pionk and spezz will get 3+ is my guess.

Meanwhile sandin will be out 1-2 months

Dcave65 · 2021-12-06T21:20:34+00:00

It's just not that simple tho, men seek out younger women even more so as they get older. So you have less of the dating pool available to you b/c most guys at that age bracket don't want to marry someone who's their age. Therefore, man single at 35, woman single at 35, larger population available to the man b/c it's naturally a bigger age bracket. Also, men just peak later in life and the older women settle down on average they are going to be a lower value man then if they locked down closer to the peak of their attractiveness

mbrseb · 2021-12-06T21:49:53+00:00

Finding a date as a woman is like biting a bait for a fish. It is always easy to let somebody slip through the gate if you are the gate keeper of sex. But when you are the one fishing for a relationship, it gets much harder

"A woman that is able to make money" is to a rich man like "a man who is able to give milk" to a fertile woman. (and yes, you can learn how to give milk as a man, don't be sexist. If you don't believe me just Google it)

Even if a rich woman picks a poor man, if the man is not the bread winner he is statistically more likely to cheat.

What big cooperation want is that women do just work and never have any children at all so they sell independence. Some cooperations who brainwash people by programming them via social media even offer their female employees money to freeze their eggs and delay childbirth. This is not a secret.

A good movie example is the Indian movie thappad where women's rights to work and be independent are advertised together with cars.

Why should a smart woman wait until 30 (when her market value is lower because of her oocytes being less healthy) to have a partner?

I think this is the shit test of evolution for women

-Dumb women just have sex with any guy and have children young (have children with a lower quality than themselves)

-Normal women just study and become independent from men and avoid being dumb and then become whine aunts with cats because they cannot find the right man (die out)

-Smart women know that they are a rockstar at age 17 and they can make any 35 year old rich Chad settle if they just try hard enough and only have children after marriage and getting her husband's credit cards (win the game)

Just got left (for arguing about the right age on when to have children) by 2 girls at age 29. They refused to have children before 30 (while I was in a 4.5 year long relationship with one of them. The first one was a smart programmer in a big company while she made more money than me and she already proposed to have children during uni which I declined. The second one an IQ 140 manager and naval architect. Both had 2 masters degrees. Both were extremely competitive and unable to raise children)

Now together with a 29 year old nurse who works in a gynecology department and thankfully knowns that advanced maternal age means less healthy children in a average and I am so happy to have found the right one and that she is much smarter since she gets 2 years of maternity leave at her job while the working and childless 30+ yo women pay taxes for her

Title	Women still have an easier time finding dates/relationships (on average) in their 30s+ vs their male counterparts.
Author	throwawaylessons103
Upvotes	111
Comments	379
Date	December 6, 2021 3:34 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ra9yfh/women_still_have_an_easier_time_finding/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-still-have-an-easier-time-finding.1088352 https://theredarchive.com/post/1088352