TL;DR --- I want marriage badly, but I feel it would divert me from things I need to do for God. Should I marry?

I (23, ~2yrs in Christ) plan to serve God as much as I can through my organized ministry. Partially from the advice, cheering, and encouragement of my friends, and partially out of my interest in these topics, I'm soon starting 1) a podcast on a non-Biblical, Christian movement, and 2) an apologetics ministry for a major non-Christian religion of my country. The first I'm planning to start in about two months, and the second probably up to four months after that.

Working as a freelancer. Making pretty nice money, even though I work part-time; I'm just starting out, so I except the income to increase and be as high as two average wages in two to three years. Love that job. I wouldn't say I can't imagine doing anything else (I have diverse interests and skills) but this is the career prospect that fits me most.

I've had some disagreements with the pastorate of the local church. The pastors and I are reconciled now, and I offered myself unto their assistance for anything the church would need. The church isn't perfect, but God calls me to serve therein.

All in all, I'm having a good life. Not everything is perfect, but I don't think I can complain. I will enjoy ministry, and even though I will have to overcome some issues that I have (e.g. I hate the sound of my voice, and how I look on videos - which is somewhat inconvenient when you have to edit those videos! I don't look bad [181cm high, 174 pounds, strength-training 5 days a week in average, looking better and lifting heavier with time passing]), I find peace in the fact that I will be both edifying the Church of Christ and bringing the unsaved to the Truth. In short, I'm almost certain that I won't look back on my life and regret that I haven't served Him.

However, there is one domain of life that's killing me. That's marriage.

Now, I'm not that much unexperienced with women, having had with them the sinful ways I did before conversion. Even so, I haven't had a relationship nor a date with a Christian lady ever since I became Christian. One Christian girl had come on to me, but I intentionally ignored her. I hadn't believed I should be dating, for various reasons.

Back then, however, I was utterly firm that I would get marry one day, that I would have a great marriage, and that this was the will of God. Now, I'm not so certain anymore. And here is why I'm confused about it: All those things I've mentioned take time; lot of it. If I am to work to feed the family, that's ~45 hours a week right there. A podcast and a apologetics ministry? ~15 hours a week, I would say. That's 60 hours a week. And even though I'd control how I spend my time, I do have to work on my job and on my ministry. For 60 hours a week. How can I do these things, and still spend time with my family?, and exhort them, and teach them the Holy Writ, and serve them?

In other words, how can I be on my purpose, and still lead a family?

Additionally - I don't see how my wife would help me on this mission. Yes, sure, she should be a "help meet" for me, but I still have to lead her and children in the faith. So, even though she would take care of groceries, homework etc., I reckon that I would still have less free time with my family than without it - or am I wrong?

Now, this wouldn't be a problem if I didn't want a wife and children - badly.

To the point when it's killing me that I don't have them. When I walk through the city and see little children, my heart breaks that I don't have them. And I don't think I am capable of explaining how much I want a wife. I know it's weak, and I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I do. And feeling that, I cannot but think of Paul's words to the Corinthians: "it is better to marry, than to burn." The burning is here usually interpreted sexually, but it's not sexual for me. It's romantic, it's intimate. I could live without sex. But I'm worried that I will spend the latter days of my life being utterly miserable because I haven't married. And even though this painful emotion isn't constant (most of the days I'm fine), sometimes it destroys me.

But I'm confused. How can it alway be better to marry, than to burn, if I have to reallocate my time from God's purpose in order to have a family? Everyone can have a family, but only I am going to be doing the ministry. I don't get it. And the closer I am to God, the stronger this desire becomes (even though I asked him countless times, to remove it from me). But I still cannot see how me having a marriage and family would glorify God. I am, to wit, utterly confused!

So I want your input and advice. On any part of my confusion.

EDIT: Just realized I forgot to mention this - I am quite firm in my decision not to monetarize either ministry. So that's not a solution.