Question about dating as a single Christian man who's looking for a Christian Woman in 2022

Deep_Strength · 2022-10-03T20:00:11+00:00

Not gonna lie here, both posts, especially the 2nd one was extremely black pilling.. enough to demoralize me from dating to begin with because it makes me think I'll have to settle, which I REALLY don't want to do. Part of the reason why I went over to Eastern Europe was to avoid that fate via Geomaxxing and because I thought that dating in America and Western Europe overall was a lost cause. Then again, I haven't been in the actual dating scene for a good 4-5 years due to focusing on my studies and self-improvement.

The problem with Geomaxxing is that if you're planning to eventually come back to the US or wherever you live then there is still going to be the temptation of the culture that you live in. There's plenty of stories of men hating western women and they find one in another culture and bring her back and then she frivorces them.

This is why it's important to be a leader, be highly involved in Church, be discipling your wife, get her involved with godly friends, and such. Maybe the pickings are better elsewhere, but you still face the same problems. At least here if you find a woman who wants to follow you then you know she is already potentially well established with good support network of the family and Church hopefully. Might be harder at first but easier in the long run.

If you try to import a woman then it may be easier at first but harder in the long run.

With that being said, responding the first two posts and asking the general question: Are there still attractive Christian women out there who aren't egotistical via being corrupted by their beauty and secular world, but instead remain faithful/devout and true to Christ? If so, where would a man like me be able to find them?

Yes, but usually most men are not doing a lot of what they can help them a lot.

What I've suggested if you're Prot/Catholic/Orthodox or whatever is that you have your main Church where you're serving in ministry and hopefully leading. But you also make time to go to other inter-denominational events and young adult groups so you meet a ton of people.

The bigger your network of Church, family, and friends and the more easily you meet a lot of different people and talk to them as long as you're putting in the work behind the scenes to get yourself in the 6-7+ range you'll likely find a woman you're attracted to.

WhereProgressIsMade · 2022-10-04T20:09:48+00:00

One thing to keep in mind is that the whole scale thing is a generalization. If the type of person you are most attracted to is a bit different than the norm, you can often get a "discount". Maybe you're a 6, but exactly what she likes the most so to her you're an 8. And she's exactly what you like the most, so an 8 to you but a 6 if you asked 100 people and averaged the scores together.

Are there still attractive Christian women out there who aren't egotistical via being corrupted by their beauty and secular world, but instead remain faithful/devout and true to Christ? If so, where would a man like me be able to find them?

There are, but they usually get snatched up young. The only female I personally know who was a 9-10 in her prime and didn't let it go to her head was my cousin, who ended up marrying a seminary student brave enough to ask her out in college. Other than her, every other one I met had little humility and too much entitlement.

Like you, I waited until after I had my career started before I started really looking. I'm advising my son to not wait that long.

Find christian singles groups. A big one I went to also did some volunteer service projects and I paid attention to which women signed up for those - I figured it was a good sign for someone of good character and not just there only trying to shop for a husband. That group was post college (so abou 22) through mid 30s. 2/3rds women, with a big clump in the 30-35 range. The few attractive women <27 got a lot of attention and usually didn't stay single long.

Red-Curious · 2022-10-06T04:10:23+00:00

Are there still attractive Christian women out there who aren't egotistical via being corrupted by their beauty and secular world, but instead remain faithful/devout and true to Christ? If so, where would a man like me be able to find them?

Sure, these women are all around. You just have to remember that the more attractive a woman is, the higher degree of temptation there will be for her to abandon her faith for worldly passions. Unattractive women don't get many men pining over them with love and attraction, so there will be a lot of women who "aren't egotistical via being corrupted by their beauty and secular world" and who "remain faithful/devout and true to Christ" because the temptation is low. The more attractive a woman gets, the greater that temptation gets, which increases the number of people who will fall away. Not everyone, but this is just basic common-sense. Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine you were a total stud and had super-model caliber women trying to sleep with you all the time, constantly pressuring you to have sex outside of marriage, compromising your faith. I don't know how high your self-control is, but most guys would admit that they'd cave. Now knock yourself down several pegs and imagine you're a pimple-faced video game geek and women show no interest in you. Pretty easy to stay "faithful/devout and true to Christ" in the face of this non-temptation, right?

Again, there are plenty of attractive women out there who "aren't egotistical" or "corrupted" and who "remain faithful/devout and true to Christ." They exist. But in many cases, they are still very young and new to the faith. Another point of common-sense is that the most attractive women will find relationships the fastest, so they're harder to find single. This goes double in the church for attractive women who are also godly. Because of how quickly and easily such women can find men who are interested in them, you're either going to have to be in the right relational network and right place at the right time to meet someone and "hit it off" who hits your ideal (i.e. the "unicorn"), which is rare ... or you find someone who is willing to learn and grow alongside you into the level of "non-egotism" "non-corruption" "faithfulness/devoutness" and "trueness to Christ" that you're looking for. In short, I always tell men not to look for unicorns, but to make them. Nobody is perfect. Unicorns don't actually exist. But by discipling a woman who is passionately drawn to serving Christ alongside you, it's very possible that God can help her grow into becoming a unicorn, using you as the vehicle to do it. Just practice prudence and caution along the way and remember that she has the charge: "Daughters of Jerusalem, do not awaken love before it so desires" - meaning you may have to be patient.

Title	Question about dating as a single Christian man who's looking for a Christian Woman in 2022
Author	Proper-Office-3573
Upvotes	7
Comments	26
Date	October 1, 2022 10:38 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RPChristians
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RPChristians/comments/xt8b74/question_about_dating_as_a_single_christian_man/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RPChristians/question-about-dating-as-a-single-christian-man.1135326 https://theredarchive.com/post/1135326