Hey ladies, I know this is a sub for ladies but as a man who is surrounded literally up and down by men making 6 and 7 figures that actually have their shit together physically, emotionally, financially, and family wise , I feel like giving you my insight based on conversations with many of these dudes for dating would be valuable.
The first thing to outline is that seeing a man with money as a "HVM" (I hate the term, but let's go with it) will lead to loads of pain. I know a few footballers and crypto dudes that with all due respect are lames dating wise. They had talent/luck in one department and money came as a byproduct of it. That is not who you probably want as they aren't as strong mentally and give in to temptations with ease. The type of guys I am talking about are 25-40, business oriented, high standards, and do not date based on potential. They assess what they have in front of them right there and then. More importantly, my actual friends are traditional to a T and do not cheat.
So, the topic of body counts is often discussed here, and I have seen a few ladies saying that it doesn't matter. It does x1000. Once you are in a certain socioeconomic space, appearances and reputation is what rule you, no man who is worth his dent would ever put himself in the position of dating somebody who has been "out there".
The sooner one comes to terms with the quote:
"women want men with a future; men want women with no past",
the more fulfilling our lives will be relationship wise.
I understand that the likelihood of dating someone with a promiscuous past, going to a restaurant with her, and seeing two men that she slept with coming to say hi to her is low, but that is how we think about it, and it is a MASSIVE FEAR we have.
Yes, some dudes do not care about your body count but I know that you'd like to date the best man possible. So, in order to get the best man, you should come to terms with the fact that the best man has his own standards and thankfully for you, they aren't even that difficult to meet, it is just that unfortunately you ladies receive lots of mixed information all around.
1- Protect your body count at all costs. This one is not even a debate. I am not gonna tell you not to be promiscuous but to accept the fact that YOUR PAST MATTERS AND IT ALWAYS WILL for men with options. ALWAYS.
There was a thread on Twitter about it. Some 18 year old was talking about her body count being 1 and feeling like she's missing out, and another woman told her to go have fun and sex with many men. Men adviced her to not listen to her. Another woman chipped in and said that she slept with over 100 men and that her partner does not care. Somebody shared the thread with the partner and he broke up with her, right there and then. She made a post saying that he broke up with her.
We are giving you the answers to the test. Don't take bad advice.
2- Work on yourself. Be well read, physically fit and have hobbies.
These dudes do not want a woman to make him the center of her life. This is not to mistake with not giving him attention but to have things you like. A personality, a passion. Drawing,writing... these are things that are lost nowadays but most dudes agree that it makes you super appealing.
I met my ex when she was writing in a very sunny day under a tree alone in a park wearing a very simple dress, a summer hat and no shoes. She radiated femininity and I was mesmerised. (We broke up because she was a little older than me and wanted to get married soon. I did not feel ready but I kind of regret it. She is all I want in a woman.
3- Limit the advice you take from your single friends. It will lead you to make bad choices that will be expensive for you from a romantic standpoint. Trust me!
4- Take accountability. We all make mistakes, dudes that have done the work will own their mistakes and won't entertain somebody who is never wrong.
5- Come to terms with the fact that double standards do exist in society both for men and women. Most men that are wealthy will unlikely be judged by most women if they are competent in every department but have been promiscuous. Women do get judged. Many women get for free or cheaper in clubs, we pay. Double standards have been there since day one.
The reason why other men look up to men with many options is because they know that consistently dating super attractive women is faaaaar from easy as they themselves have tried and failed miserably. that is why it is not frowned upon for men (generally speaking). Furthermore, the prettier the ladies I personally dated, the more pretty ladies took initiative and approached me in other occasions, despite having seen me with other women. That is just how it has been.
As a lady, you can be literally dirt broke or even homeless, that if you are decent looking, you can get laid with 5 dudes a day just saying "let's have sex". Since it is so easy for you, most dudes believe that you should make yourself exclusive. With great power comes great responsibility. The choice is yours nevertheless.
I know for a fact that if I hadn't done what I did for a living, made good money, drive what I drive... I would not get 1/10 of the options I do. I had to become. When I am in the VIP of clubs, the men there tend to have money, the ladies there, do not. Literally 90% don't, yet we are in the same place. I had to delete my IG for years, work like a donkey, learn, reinvest on my company, suffer, and finally see the light. they just had to be hot, and I am totally fine with it. That is just how society has always been. I understand that those women do not represent the general but you get the analogy, it still applies in different levels and situations.
Protect what God gave you. Your cards are there in a way with men, protect them and improve them. You'll find yourself with a good man sooner rather than later. Be a forward thinker. Ignore fuckboys and learn about yourself. If you have a history of beinng attracted to bad men, address it and correct it, you will thank yourself in the future.
PS: I am not saying I agree or disagree with the double standards but they are a fact. I am personally not promiscuous but I dated a bit, and no woman I have dated has ever cared about my body count despite them having a below 4 body count (they said that. I believed them as they were pretty religious like me).
80% of of this post is me repeating literally what most of them said and the other 20% my experiences.
So yeah, good luck!