The Good It was a Valentine's Day and being late eaters we timed ourselves to be one of the last tables seated, therefore we missed the earlier rush so the servers were harried but getting things under control. We were perfectly happy in our booth, oblivious to the world in our little heart bubble. When the bill came, it had a problem; it seemed too low almost half because she left the drink tab off. The waitress was so relieved: "OMG, I'm new, they would have fired me!" and still got a good tip. My date was over the moon proud of me, and it was like our heart bubble expanded to that whole section of the restaurant.

The Bad We met online and talked online and by phone quite a bit before our first date, so we felt pretty comfortable together when we finally met. The date was going well, finally our first kiss, how sweet, right? Nope! My date jammed their tongue into my mouth and swished it back and forth rhythmically like a windshield wiper: Swish-swosh-Swish-swosh!

That was strange, I thought; maybe they were nervous on the first kiss or something. Nope! We kiss again. Swish-swosh-Swish-swosh! Not long after that I was shaking their hand goodnight!

The Strange An acquaintance had long expressed an interest in dating me, so eventually the stars aligned and we finally planned a first date at an Indian restaurant because they'd never tried it.

My date was a little nervous but looking forward to experiencing new tastes. The first dish arrived, they took a bite, then did this weird cartoonishly exaggerated chipmunk-nibble while looking back and forth at other nearby diners. They ate the rest of the plate normally, but repeated the chipmunk act on the first bite of every new dish, which made it 6 or 7 times. I don't embarrass easily, but that was too much; I don't know a word of Hindi but could totally tell we were being talked about at nearby tables. We went on another sputtering date or two but never connected.

The Scary My friend described her first meeting with a guy she met online. He pulled into the parking space next to her, rolled down his window, and said in his best Hannibal Lecter voice, "Hello, Clarise!"

I'm not sure what kind of guy thinks this is a good way to impress a girl, but the only thing she beat that night was a very hasty retreat!


Let's have some fun! Share your interesting dating tales.