I feel like I am failing as a girlfriend. I don't know how to control my emotions sometimes and let them get the better of me. The problem is my desire to talk.

In past relationships, I would have no problem with having deep conversations with boyfriends about life, direction, the future, kids, marriage, philosophies, troubles etc. However in my relationship right now these kinds of talks and d&ms are rare. I feel like we still haven't even touched these topics even after 10 months of being together.

I am beginning to feel a little disconnected. I am starting to feel like I don't know where I stand with him or where I fit in. I would like to know the answers to all of my ponderings but is 10 months too soon to talk about these things? Or does it scream that I'm a clinger and thinking too far ahead?

We have plenty of sex and I am always enthusiastic, never a starfish. Immediately after sex I feel euphoric and everything is great and I don't have a care in the world for discussing personal topics but about 20 minutes later the feeling starts to creep back in.

I feel like I am failing because I have expressed my desire to talk more too many times and I hate myself after every time I bring it up. I feel like I am nagging and making him feel like a failed boyfriend too because he's not meeting my needs. He says he is content with our amount of talking. I have asked him what his needs are, thinking that he would say sex and then I could relate my desire for personal talk to how he desires sex to feel connected. But he said doesn't have any needs because he has me and we are together.

It is my fault because I am too scared to initiate these conversations in case I mess every thing up and he's not ready to talk about these things.

I am also scared to initiate these talks because I have no idea how to introduce these kinds of topics and let them seem natural and not like a job interview or something.

I am also hesitant to start these conversations because I am scared to take the lead where he hasn't. If he was concerned about any of these topics wouldn't he have brought it up by now? Does that mean he doesn't think of me in the same way as I do of him?

Another thing that is prolonging this is that because he has room mates we have to have sex with the tv on to blur the noise and afterwards in the critical pillow talk time he gets distracted watching the tv and is content with this. I don't want to annoy him by turning it off but I would like his full attention if I'm going to man up and talk about these topics with him.

He is older than me by 3 years and we are both in our early twenties. But I would like to get married while I am young and have children young too and there is no point dating someone who does not share the same goals as me.

Sorry for the long post I am just a mixed ball of emotions. Please help me to clear my head in regards to the situation. Any advice you give me would be much appreciated. I am always grateful for the advice you give in this community.