I guess this is a field report. I just wanted to share.
My husband and I have been together for 5.5 years, married for 2.5.
We recently moved to a new city because he got a new job. I was able to leave my former career and start freelancing in a new field.
With freelancing comes a lot of downtime, because I'm not yet too established. But at this point, we aren't sure if I should be. It's all because of a cleaning app called Tody (not affiliated, just a huge fan). I just set up how frequently a chore should be done, and it gives me a personalized to-do list every day. Just do the chores it tells you to. If you don't finish, they'll still be there tomorrow with an angry red "x days overdue" sign. Nothing like "Clean the toilets" with "4 days overdue" to make you feel gross but also motivated!!
After using this app for some time, I also started getting interested in homemaking -- something I was never quite able to do properly working 70 hours a week in my old career.
I started watching Mrs. Midwest and The Daily Connoisseur. I really started trying at being a homemaker.
And my husband's reaction was flooring. He walks home after work and raves about how clean our home is. My MIL is coming over this evening to stay for Thanksgiving; he kissed me this morning and said,
"You've been doing such a good job with chores, there's nothing for me to clean before my mom gets here. I love you."
In the past, he would be running around the house, completely anxious, cleaning up after *me* to prepare for his mom's arrival while I caught up on work so that I could socialize with her later. That's so backwards looking at it now.
Instead, today, he is in a state of calm. We are both able to relax on the sofa with a cup of coffee and enjoy our Saturday morning. (We're both playing some video games. You can live an idyllic, feminine lifestyle and still be yourself!)
Be the steward of your home, and he will be the steward of your life together.