How do conservative women convince men that they are not gold diggers?

SunshineSundress · 2021-11-09T09:44:07+00:00

“As a traditional masculine man, I want a woman who has big boobs and an even more voluptuous behind who can bear me beautiful healthy sons. However, when I bring this up with conservative women I date, they do not react well to the idea. Many of them seem to be active in RPW social media, which tends to demonize “thirsty” men.

“How do I marry a woman who has a large rack and childbearing hips without getting backlash that I am a creep?”

Wouldn’t you feel grossed out if a guy said this to you on a date? This is what you sound like to the men you’re dating. It isn’t wrong for you to want a man who can provide (just like it isn’t wrong for men to want sexy women), but your approach to achieving this goal is tactless and cringeworthy. Telling men that you want them to be wealthy and able to provide for you will only turn off the men who fit your criteria, and will let the scammers know what appearances to put on to get what they want from you.

pieorstrudel5 · 2021-11-09T14:37:06+00:00

Bless your heart (I am southern).

You need to STFU. Only tacky classless women say out loud they want a wealthy man. And what wealthy man wants a tacky wife?

Also... You need to focus on what you bring to the table! A wife of a wealthy man is a reflection of their husband. So you need to be able to run an efficient home, stick to the budget he gives you and not squander his money on bullshit like golden goose sneakers, you need to be active in the community (service work or volunteer at your church), you need to be able to decorate a home tastefully or know that you need to hire someone to help you, and you need to be his soft place to land and all the other RPW tenants.

Girls need to stop focusing on how to get a rich man, but focus on what they can do to get a rich man. Being tacky and telling a man you want his money.... I can't even believe that you thought that was a good idea.

It's your responsibility to vet these men. There are ways to figure out what you are looking for without being so crass about it.

virphirod · 2021-11-09T09:35:35+00:00

change your mentality from "I want a man who has high income and wealth who can provide" to "I want a man who can provide"

If "HIGH income and wealth" is your priority, then you are in fact a gold digger.

KombuchaEnema · 2021-11-09T11:09:25+00:00

A man stays with his wife because she was there for him when he was still building his wealth. If you weren’t there for him from the beginning, don’t expect to jump in at the end and then still be treated like anything more than eye candy and a fun time.

If he’s not worthy of you when he’s just starting out, you aren’t worthy of him once he’s successful.

grahamcookiefart · 2021-11-09T11:25:10+00:00

How do I avoid coming off like a gold digger while being a gold digger?

SecretFeminine · 2021-11-09T08:55:11+00:00

I don't know why you would bring this up at all.

crater01 · 2021-11-09T15:35:59+00:00

Okay, you also posted this, about how women “could get nothing in a divorce if a man holds crypto”. This honestly sounds like gold-digging behavior, which is why someone else made a post about this very thing last week.

There’s a difference between wanting a man who can take care of you and the kids versus what you’re doing. You are straight up telling men you want them to be rich and then also asking the internet about how to secure the bag in the event a man has crypto. This is disturbing tbh.

Whisper · 2021-11-09T19:05:35+00:00

You are one.

Do you know why so many billionaires have reasonably hot wives their own age, as opposed to smoking hot professional models twenty years younger than they are?

Because when you are very wealthy, one of the hardest things to get your hands on is someone you know is committed to you, not your wealth. So they tend to marry girls who were with them out of the starting gate.

Not ones who did what you are doing, which is wait at the finish line in a short skirt.

red_Mercedez · 2021-11-09T15:35:16+00:00

I think it's in the way you behave. Act in a way that makes it seem you are not impressed by status, wealth, success. You can be impressed by someone's ambition dedication and work ethic. You are impressed by the kindness and sincerity of a man. Never make it known that you value his money above his character. Cater to his ego.

It's all in the way you act, the way you talk, the way you respond to things. It is very subtle cues that men pick up on.

I think the key thing is make it seem like they are very important to you, but money has nothing to do with it (haha)

Also, have hobbies/family/friends/social time outside the relationship and make sure you have a passion and love for life in general, not solely money and being taken care of !:)

Be an asset to him, not a liability.

FoxWyrd · 2021-11-09T08:07:54+00:00

Do you bring a high income to the relationship yourself?

Pattymelt07 · 2021-11-11T00:11:57+00:00

Saying it that way makes it sound as if that's all you want. I am going to assume there is more you want out of a man. It would probably be best to not even bring it up unless asked. If asked, bring up other traits you deserve along with it, just in a better way.

Also, you must be valuable enough for him to be willing to take care of you in that manor. Anyone that just sits at home and does nothing will not be valuable enough for it. So be introspective and evaluate yourself. Fix anything that needs fixing and be the type of person that another would want to take care of.

aussiedollface2 · 2021-11-11T07:20:18+00:00

If you’re a high quality woman I find only high quality men assume that you’re in their league. The others get scared and leave you alone lol. xo

anothergoodbook · 2021-11-09T12:00:38+00:00

The question would really become - what are YOU bringing to the relationship that would make a high income man even want you. And yes it does sound like gold digging when you put it that way.

I would argue that most conservative men would be more than happy to provide for their wife and family. It’s a point of pride. But they don’t want to be used. They want a wife who is going to give just as much as they will - not financially, but in taking care of the home and family.

Do you cook? How do you dress and present yourself? Do you keep a tidy and neat home? Are you super argumentative? What would you bring to a relationship that isn’t money?

And yes - if you walk into a date saying, “I’m looking for a wealthy guy to support me” you sound like a gold digger. Is it wrong to look for someone knowing they’d be able to provide? No. But it’s going to be a quick turn off to a guy to feel like you don’t want them - but that you want their money.

FlyingSpaceBanana · 2021-11-09T15:29:38+00:00

May I suggest that if you want money you earn it yourself before expecting it from someone else?

Noressa · 2021-11-09T18:36:20+00:00

My (now) husband was concerned about that when he was dating. He was in early at Google and had quite a bit of savings already set away. When I started dating him, he listed no income. I asked him if he could pay his bills comfortably and wasn't in danger of being in debt. He said he could do that. So we started dating. It wasn't until many years down the line that he told me how much he had and how he had it. And that was fine by me. We're not extravagant, we aren't huge spenders. But we have a lovely house, 2 adorable girls and they get to grow up being pretty dang comfortable. He will still occasionally tell me about money and if he changes things with stocks and the like, but I trust him. He tells me mostly out of me being his partner, not because he needs me to weigh in on it.

It takes time, trust, and showing that you are someone they want as a partner, even if money was out of the equation.

blink183hashtag · 2021-11-09T09:45:49+00:00

How convince men you’re not gold digger:

Demonstrate an interest unrelated to money.

I’m not sure being a conservative relates to wanting a wealthy man. Food, water, shelter, love, and purpose could be obtained without the use of money. He could hunt/grow food. Dig a well for water. Build a house. Show you love. Derive purpose from supporting his family. How did we manage before the invention of money?

A high value man already provides for himself and he’ll provide for his future woman. Imagine your dream husband. Why does he want a relationship? What is your role in it?

Bringing up money on a date is taboo and ill received. Money is just a result of his effort or luck. I think he’d appreciate acknowledgment of his sacrifices and work ethic more than a point at his job title or inheritance. Akin to a woman’s beauty via her diligent exercise and apparel vs her big-boob genes and symmetrical face.

Gold diggers are self-aware and smart. They actively appeal to whatever is necessary to attract specific, vulnerable men. Their priority is pocketing everything necessary to sustain their own independent lifestyle. If you feel you relate to this mentality, I’m not sure this subreddit will be of much guidance.

LateralThinker13 · 2021-11-09T17:48:16+00:00

I want a man who has high income and wealth who can provide. However, when I bring this up with conservative men I date, they do not react well to the idea.

Because what they hear is a list of demands. Ya know, like an entitled gold digger would present them.

I don't hear ANYTHING about what you offer, other than that you are conservative. What do YOU bring to the table that makes you worthy of a HVM?

Put THAT on the table FIRST, and you'll get a warmer reception.

Lando_620 · 2021-11-09T12:33:31+00:00

Simply put, don't say things. Words mean nothing in comparison to actions, actions are the truth of things. You can typically get some idea of a man's success through careful observation and without directly asking or talking about it. Beyond that things like baking small treats/snacks, or offering to help clean up after a get together/party are the sort of little actions that show you offer more to a partnership.

A women wanting a man that is successful is not automatically a gold digger. A gold digger in my opinion is just a different word for sugar baby...someone who wants expensive gifts/lifestyle but only offers sexual access to the partnership. A gold digger is fundamentally just someone with an unbalanced entitlement mentality. The male side of the redpill is not perfect and you have some bad apples poisoning the wellspring of ideas.

Pycnostyle · 2021-11-09T19:21:29+00:00

I have some bad news for you: high net worth men are actively screening against partners who are primarily interested in their money. That predates any "manosphere", pills of any colors, etc. Hopefully, the reason is obvious. We want a partner who actually likes us and will enhance our lives.

I'd recommend that you not think about a partner in terms of net worth. Rather, you should be thinking about the life and lifestyle that you want. If you meet some dude who's already living that way, you'll have a much easier time convincing him that you actually like him and want to partner up with him. You know, that whole living authentically thing.

Important note: A high net worth partner doesn't automatically grant you a better life. What if he works 80 hours a week to get all that wealth and you hardly ever see him? What if he's frequently on-call and needs to interrupt time you were hoping to spend together?

If you've read this far and you still really just want a lot of money, I recommend that you hop into the driver's seat and earn it yourself.

RadiantLuminals · 2021-11-09T08:23:23+00:00

How are you approaching it? You can have the same conversation a million different ways.

statuseffect_ · 2021-11-09T20:24:36+00:00

OP I’m curious why you only want a wealthy man who can provide. What - out if curiosity - do you want him to provide? Is it something you can’t provide yourself? Why is wealth so important to you? Why are you not doing anything to be wealthy yourself, if it’s so important to you? Wouldn’t it be better if you were both wealthy and combined your efforts? Then you would really get what you want. Or are you just lazy and don’t want - or can’t - hold onto a job?

TheBunk_TB · 2021-11-10T00:35:59+00:00

What ever happened to building a life with someone who has vision and passion?

mei_pendleton · 2021-11-09T20:18:26+00:00

If you only care about a man’s income and bring it up to their faces, you might as well become a sugar baby. You sound immature and don’t deserve a high quality man who wants to build a life together with his partner. Work on yourself before you go back into dating.

ProxPxD · 2021-11-09T13:34:08+00:00

Beinging it up quickly may be the exact sign for the men of gold digging. Focusing on other important aspects of a relationship may be much better.

Nevertheless, you may get to know more or less the salary of a man by knowing what is his job. You can listen to what he is doing snd in this way you can deduce it more or less. You'd know where are you heading to.

But how others have already said it's not so important at the beginning. It may be inadequate to ask it too fast

Jumpy_Alfalfa_5112 · 2021-11-10T03:12:03+00:00

Do you have high income and wealth? Because if you don’t and that’s what you’re looking for then that’s what you are doing. But let me explain myself…I’ve been divorced for 9 yrs and what I learned from it is that my next wife would have to be comparable financially with me or no cigar. And that is part of the reason I’m still single but that doesn’t make me a gold digger just someone who wants to protect my wealth.

pearlsandstilettos · 2021-11-12T12:08:14+00:00

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Diamond-Breath · 2021-11-18T18:36:47+00:00

First step is realizing that people will always talk no matter what you do, so grow a tougher shell. Second of all, don't speak about money, observe him and how he treats you. Is he generous? Are you gracious in receiving? He'll feel like the manliest man alive if he notices that he's providing for an ultra feminine woman. Research and adopt feminine behaviors, and next time you talk with a man like this, act shy and bashful. You'll seem lovely and genuine. The rest is up to you and how well you adopt femininity.

theggyolk · 2021-11-27T08:02:07+00:00

If you want kids. Communicate that possibly.

Title	How do conservative women convince men that they are not gold diggers?
Author	purplegirl2034
Upvotes	37
Comments	60
Date	November 9, 2021 8:07 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/qpyzi9/how_do_conservative_women_convince_men_that_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-conservative-women-convince-men-that-they.1085093 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085093