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I [28F] grew out my hair and am literally beating men off with sticks

December 5, 2021

I was a bit of an ugly duckling in high school, and my hair was long and frizzy. I assumed I’d never be able to have long hair. When I got to college (where I blossomed physically), I cut it to shoulder-length, and it was cute and manageable.

Guys liked me, but the only ones who actually asked me out were over 40. I always had to approach them (cute men my age.)

During quarantine, I let my hair grow out past my shoulders. I have a much better diet, so it’s beautiful and healthy. Sometimes it gets frizzy, but nothing like what it was.

Oh my God. For the first time in my life, men off of dating apps are asking me out. I work remote at a coffee shop and I get approached 3 to 4 times a week by attractive men in their early 20s to late thirties, and the older creepy men mostly leave me alone. I have to block guy’s numbers to get them to stop calling me. Insane.

I have always been feminine, with make-up and dresses, but my hair was just on the shorter side (chin-length to two inches above shoulder.)

Just wanted to a subreddit that would say “duh.” Dating advice: Get long hair.

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Post Information
Title I [28F] grew out my hair and am literally beating men off with sticks
Author balletaurelie
Upvotes 100
Comments 40
Date December 5, 2021 12:09 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link
Original Link

[–]cats5483 29 points30 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

not only does having long hair attract men easier, but it also makes it so you can style your hair in many ways to complement your features. i had a pixie cut during high school as i didnt want to manage my messy hair. ive been growing it out for about 2.5 years and its chest-length. i learned how to care for my hair and invested in products that were beneficial to my hair type. i do not regret it all. i love my hair!

[–]SunshineSundressEndorsed Contributor 22 points23 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

My hair is butt-length when it’s straight and it’s so much lower maintenance than when I had a bob. I HAD to blow out the bob every day or else it would stick out in all directions and just look crazy. It would end up sticking out by the end of the day regardless of what I did. With the long hair and my layers, I can let it air-dry for a boho look or wrap it in one of these bad boys, which takes about 2 minutes to do, and wake up with perfect curls.

[–]CountTheBeesEndorsed Contributor 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That looks really easy to DIY. Thanks for the project idea.

[–]SunshineSundressEndorsed Contributor 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s the best hair tool I’ve ever used, hands down! If your hair struggles to hold a curl like mine, I found it helpful to do it on damp-ish hair, when it’s around 80% dry. It makes the curls a lot more bouncy and they last ALL day, sometimes a little TOO well on the days I want more of a wave 😂

[–]cats5483 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

what an awesome tool for heatless curls! i wont need it since my hair is naturally wavy. if i want some extra bounce, however, ill do a french braid before bed. plus the braid protects my hair while im sleeping

[–]SunshineSundressEndorsed Contributor 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oooh, I looove how sleeping in a braid looks! It turns out very mermaidy on me hehe

[–]balletaurelie 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Even on days when I’m working out and my hair looks terrible, it still makes a difference!

[–]All_Lurk_No_Post365 16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nice 👍 ya in general men love long hair, it's mesmerizing.

[–]MrsChiliad 18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s true. Most men prefer long(er) hair. That depends a bit on the rest of your appearance too. I’m 5’1, so very long hair looks goofy and disproportional on me, but when I started dating my husband my hair was medium length, a bit below the shoulders.

[–]sorcieres 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I can't wait to have long hair again. I've been cutting it short for so long and it's taking forever to grow :(

[–]LastAmericanLion 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

exactly, long hair on a woman is extremely attractive. I don't think women understand the power that hair has over men.

[–]dadudenines 12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup. Hair and fitness will completely transform a woman into man bait. Here is someone age 42, she could compete with college students for attention:

[–]scamall15 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Good for you 😃 Unfortunately, not every women can have long hair. Mine are very thin and flat, shoulder-lenght is the absolute maximum I can afford. My mom had to keep her hair pixie style, since her hair were (and are) even worse. So yeah...

[–]Conical90 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My girlfriend is 5”2 and her hair is long and straight down her butt, that’s legit what attracted me towards her. I’ve told her that if she cuts it short, she probably wouldn’t be as attractive to me. Luckily she never had intention of cutting it short at all, so we’re good.

[–]VulcanSummers602 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I try to tell women to do more of that. I'm happy for you.

[–]stunningmother 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Let me grow my hair then

[–]sweetvioletfluff 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I have healthy hair and in general look worse with long hair, because my face is small and my hair is pretty thick ( though currently, I’m sick of my pixie and am growing out my hair for fun). I get told even by men, that I look better with a short pixie 🤨 I am in totally agreement that long hair is something that elevates most peoples look, and I really wish it could look good on me too 😄 I find it super feminine

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]sweetvioletfluff 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Also a possibility but I do have good haircuts etc. It’s just that my face and frame is small. I don’t really stand out with long hair, short hair really brings my features into sharp focus. Also my hair is just thick, not frizzy but a lot of volume at the roots. It would look good on a person with a broader frame I imagine.

[–]prince0verit 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Try some argan oil to tame the frizzy hair. Works like a charm.

Congrats on the recent success with men.

[–]lastviking909 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Wait, literally?

[–]balletaurelie 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link


Edit: no I am not literally beating them off

[–]singeblanc 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What sort of stick are you using?

[–]balletaurelie 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m not, I’m sorry, obviously it’s an expression

[–]ParamedicCapable6484 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

My hair went mid back when me n hubby got married but w my pregnancy my long hair was driving me crazy and the health of it too after over a yr of growing it out I could see my healthy curly hair and my ends were dead from frying over the years so I cut it in March of this year and I miss it so much. It's growing way healthier and faster now though, i have 3c/4a hair. Anyone else have this hair type that got it long let me know!!

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]LivelyLychee[M] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Rule 3: Do not insult members of the community. If you cannot communicate politely and appropriately, do not bother to at all. The comment was off-base and has been removed, but she was not unnecessarily rude like you are here.

[–]balletaurelie 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

That’s fair!

[–]LivelyLychee[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m not sure if this is sarcastic or not. Either way, it is irrelevant and OP was using the phrase as a figure of speech. Removed.

[–]show_me_the_dopamine -3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hi Rapunzel

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Wow that's amazing and I'm really jealous ! I'm 9 years younger than you but I don't get any attention and never have :( ( but obviously I want to). It sucks because I know these are the years Im supposed to look the best but I still look a mess. I've always had short hair but recently I've been trying to grow it out so it can be at least mid back length. I hope I reach my goal in a couple of years to feel better about myself and hopefully that will help with attraction to.

[–]balletaurelie 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Are you conventionally pretty? Beauty does not always have to do with age

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

No and that's why I want to improve my looks now because at least I'm still young and look youthful. I doubt I would look conventionally attractive without the help of plastic surgery which I've seriously been considering.

[–]balletaurelie 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would focus more on developing other features of your personality, like being nurturing and feminine. Age in my experience doesn’t really affect the number of men who stare at you.

[–]ihopemewingworks 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

With the frizz, I'd recommend to using hair products that can help with that. Some people even with a great diet just naturally have tendencies to frizz. But you can defiently "fix" it with hair products

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh, just like me except I'm a man

[–]aussiedollface2 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This. I grew out my hair really long before my wedding when I was 29 and men couldn’t stop staring at it. I even had a few interstate colleagues I hadn’t seen in about a year say oh you’ve grown your hair! and gaze at it admiringly.

Good luck with your newfound dating success! xo

[–]WeeklyAtmosphere 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It sucks for us alopecians out there man

[–]purplepansy88 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would like to know how you made your hair less frizzy.

I'm married so I'm not exactly looking to 'beat men off with a stick' but I deal with terrible frizz and I would like to get rid of it.

I have naturally wavy hair. I keep it just past my shoulders.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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