Frequently on RPW, there are a lot of posts about how to keep a man's interest in the long term, particularly how to maintain one's attractiveness after the Wall hits. Throughout these discussions, there's the persistent fear of losing a partner to a younger model. For this reason, I would like to share a personal anecdote and the lesson I derived from it.
My husband and I were discussing the dating lives of his single male friends and the type of women to whom they're attracted. Curiosity got to me and I asked: "If you had to describe me as a 'type,' what would that be?"
He paused for a moment and replied: "Jessica Rabbit."
"What?!" If he weren't such a literalist, I would've chided him for mocking me or for this absurd attempt at flattery.
"You're just so sensual and womanly," he explained. "You could definitely cosplay as her if you wanted to."
Um... no. On my best days, I can probably pull off Betty Boop... but if I'm being honest, those best days are fewer and far between as of late. I'm frequently exhausted caring for our baby twins. I'm still squishy in the middle after having them. I marvel that I even manage to dress in proper clothes rather than succumb to the desire to wear my fluffy Hello Kitty pajama pants all day long.
So why, of all people, did Jessica friggin' Rabbit come to his mind? Love Goggles!
Just as beer goggles can make a drunk guy go home with a girl he wouldn't even look twice at if he were sober, the love goggles can make a husband look at his dear wife as if she is the femme fatale of his adolescent fantasies. If your partner loves and cherishes you, and you regularly shower him with affection, tenderness, and desire, you don't have to spend your days constantly worried that he's going to bang his secretary because you found a gray in your hair that morning; his love goggles won't notice.
Now, this isn't the blue-pilled bullshit that if a man really loves you, it's OK for you to gain 600 lbs and be a slob. No... if anything, you should feel inspired to be more like the woman he sees through his love goggles. The day after this conversation, I brought my red lipstick out of the bowels of my purse and bought a new push-up bra. :-)
I suppose it's worth saying, too, that the reverse of the love goggles is possible. You could be the hottest piece of ass in your zip code, but if you're a miserable shrew, you probably look like Freddie Krueger to him for making his life such waking nightmare.
Hope you find this helpful!