I moved here to be with my SO in January 2014. I did not know anyone; I took the first job I could find once I got here, then found a job in my career field a year after that. It's now been 5 months since I started a job in my career field (where I intend to stay - it's a very family friendly place, and I love it) and I want to start making friends, finally. I couldn't really do it while I worked my previous job because I worked weird hours and couldn't do any of the things I wanted to do, like attend ballet classes or go to any of the library events.

The trouble is, the culture here is primarily built around going to bars. I don't mind going to bars, but I am VERY irritated by the necessity of shutting down men who have a tendency to be persistent. I understand they're just trying to pick up women, but I am in no way interested in cheating on my awesome SO, so I'm really just incredibly annoyed by their efforts. The first time I went out by myself here, I had to sneak out of the bar I was in because some guy got very aggressive in his attempts to get me to go home with him and smashed a glass in his anger at my rejection - it was not pretty. The bartender understood my alarm and nodded me out when I handed him money; it's a bar my SO and I go to fairly regularly, so I think he recognized me.

I have never had to make friends - up until when I moved here, I'd been friends with the same people since I was a kid. I grew up in a small town and I unfortunately never developed good social skills. I've made friends with my SO's family (I really thought his sister-in-law and I could be good friends, but she has a tendency to demean her husband (my SO's brother) a lot and it makes me uncomfortable because I don't have a desire to badmouth my SO) but other than having lunch with his mom here and there during the week, that's the best I've been able to do.

I'm hoping someone here has more advice for me - I really want to make female friends with the same RPW ideals, but I have NO CLUE where to begin. Most of my interests are not traditionally feminine - I'm a hunter, fisherwoman, and a markswoman - my SO is supportive of these hobbies, but I have no friends to share them with. I'm also a musician and ballet dancer, but those are very cliquey niches to break into - I feel like an outsider and I don't know how to break in. I don't want to try to make friends in bars - no one makes long-lasting friends there, and that's what I'm hoping for. Help?