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Mothering styles

May 3, 2017

When your boyfriend/husband was a child.

Do you see a difference in personality and his choice of partner depending on how he was mothered as a child/teenager?

For instance, if he had an overbearing mother, do you find he needs a more dominant girlfriend/wife?

If your boyfriend was naturally independent and needed limited mothering (eg. didn't need his mom to tell him to stop playing video games and do his homework), does he prefer a more submissive girlfriend?

Other examples welcome (siblings, father, colleagues, friends, etc)

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Post Information
Title Mothering styles
Author vanBeethovenLudwig
Upvotes 14
Comments 4
Date May 3, 2017 7:09 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit /r/RedPillWomen
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[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I see this pattern in a lot of men I know.

My father was very independent growing up, knew what to do and how to handle everything himself, my grandmother always left him alone. He despises when my mother tells him what to do. He originally chose her because she was sweet and submissive but she turned into a nagging shrew later on.

My boyfriend is the same as my father, handles everything himself. I'm quite submissive and I don't really like telling people what to do (unless I'm at my job).

My brother grew up with my mother being overbearing because he was a really active boy and my mom tried to squash it out of him. He strove to please her throughout his childhood. He chose a wife that wears the pants in the relationship. He is a Greater Beta and she makes most of the decisions.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

He's very independent and has an overbearing mother. I think he just naturally digs in his heels. It's both a family trait and a family survival mechanism. I have to remind him to choose his battles and that "all of them" isn't an option.

As for me, I'm very independent and have a very supportive father. I often joke that he's wasted on ME and my apple pie goals. He should be the father of a lesbian traveling author.

[–]scallopkidEndorsed Contributor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have to remind him to choose his battles and that "all of them" isn't an option.

Hahaha :)

In response to his overbearing mother, I have a theory that they tend to cause both extremes depending on if the guy has more of a tendency to learn to crave it or to rebel against it.

[–]kekerae1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My husband had a working mom and two younger siblings and was mostly a latch key kid. His mother has admitted on several occasions that she probably wasn't as involved in her sons lives as she should have been. For example, just taking her teens words for it when they said they didn't have homework and then finding out come report card time that they were extremely behind and their grades suffering, etc.

My DH is pretty independent in that he is fully capable in a kitchen or doing housework. I am surprised, but maybe not that surprised because of his mother's statements about how she wishes she was around more, that he is so supportive of me being a SAHM. I stay at home with our 2 year old and have another child on the way due this fall and I know he's very supportive of me continuing to do so until I want to do otherwise.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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