PSA: men care a lot more about your body than your face

arabiandoll · 2021-01-20T19:11:26+00:00

I think if you’re overweight enough you become invisible to most men. The bare minimum is being a healthy weight. What makes a “hot” body for men is the amount of curves. A rectangle shaped body with wide shoulders and no boobs or butt is not the same as a girl the same exact weight but more curves and feminine bone structure. And I 100% think that a pretty face is more valuable to men than the curvy body, but it’s definitely a plus. Also, if you store most of your fat in your hips, butt, and boobs then you can get away with (and even benefit from) a heavier weight than someone who gains their fat mostly in their midsection. It’s really not just weight.

KombuchaEnema · 2021-01-20T13:26:10+00:00

I can’t say anything about what body parts men prioritize over others, but one thing I have noticed as an adult is that men are far more generous and forgiving regarding a woman’s appearance than I ever would’ve expected as a teenager.

A woman that I would expect to be rated as a 2/10 or a 3/10 by men is often rated much higher. Hell, even my fiancé thinks I’m far more attractive than I think I deserve credit for.

Mewster1818 · 2021-01-20T16:02:22+00:00

I also see a lot of these "woe is me" posts coming from our younger girls, and I have to wonder if they have a distorted sense of what they should look like since they've grown up with Instagram and social media icons who use a LOT of deceptive editing and a LOT of help from things like fillers. Simply put, even in their "natural, no make-up" photo there's a lot of extra help going on that doesn't reflect reality.

Statistically most of us are probably average, but that's fine because average is easy to work with. Finding a good skincare routine, a simple and natural makeup routine, nice haircut... all things that can be done with minimal effort and expense. Plus we have to remember that the way we see ourselves is always distorted from reality to some extent. When I look in the mirror I can easily fixate on what I consider my worst features, but that's simply just not the way that my husband or friends or family sees me.

IcarusKiki · 2021-01-20T17:23:57+00:00

I hate to disagree but I feel like being not fat is the bare minimum and then hot face, t and a. Most resign butterfaces to the hookup category. Of course fat distorts the face so that will always come first

BroChapeau · 2021-01-20T21:38:35+00:00

Health/fitness is critical, but there's very good news for ladies. Men are attracted to feminine energy, and you can cultivate that poise, self-respect, joy, and openness/vulnerability. The power is such that I've experienced attraction to energy I felt across a train car without knowing which woman I was feeling it from.

I once saw a 70 year old woman in Ukraine who took my breath away. It was a public bus and I saw her only from a distance, but she was radiant and the energy was pouring off of her. I'll probably never forget it, and it taught me a valuable lesson about what is actually attracting me.

The allure of the feminine is intoxicating. As long as you meet the minimum bar of health/fitness, nearly any woman can become a 9+ in most mens' eyes. Work on yourself, and you'll attract the people you deserve in to your life.

abacabbmk · 2021-01-20T12:57:19+00:00

I would say nice face is top, but a mans not going to care that your face is nice if youre overweight.

So, assuming you're not overweight to begin with, face is most important. But if your overweight, your face is irrelevant. If that makes sense.

Also note that losing lots of weight can change your face a lot too, so you can get body+face improvements while working towards a healthy weight.

rosesonthefloor · 2021-01-20T14:11:47+00:00

Yeah I think as long as you’re not obese, face (and attitude tbh) counts for more than you think it does. Weight can change. Your face is basically your face, even with weight loss.

If you’re a few pounds overweight, but got a super cute face and a good attitude, you’re probably not running into too much trouble unless you’re hoping for NSA sex with the top 1% of guys.

However yeah, if you’re 50+ pounds overweight, you gotta sort that first. Especially if you’re just looking for sex. If you’re just looking for sex, body is king.

Long-term relationships (which is the goal of most RPW) are about so much more, and bodies are just one facet (albeit a decently weighted - no pun intended - one).

FDSanon · 2021-01-20T22:43:45+00:00

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PrintingFeelings · 2021-01-20T13:15:34+00:00

I have to disagree here. A decent body is a minimum but face is the most important thing for a ltr.

aussiedollface2 · 2021-01-20T21:03:12+00:00

I think ranking highly in one of the departments, ie. face or body, gives you a bit of leeway in the other department. Increasing your body desirability is pretty easy so basically everyone should do that! xo

cast-away-ramadi06 · 2021-01-20T14:06:35+00:00

Ok, here's a guy's perspective.

The most important thing for most guys is a mostly in-shape body. There's the obvious sexual component but the health component is huge in the long term. Don't buy into the "big is beautiful/healthy".

From there, as long as a partner is "good enough" in terms of natural looks, things they do have control over are more important (hygiene, styling, etc). What's good enough varries from person to person. And then of course then you also have morals, values, and personality traits.

Tits and asses get guys attention and that's helpful from a SMV perspective but, definitionaly, no HVM is going to prioritize those things in a relationship at the expense of how good of a wife and mother he thinks you'll be. Let me say that again, if a guy is telling you that tits and ass matter in a relationship, and you think he's a high value man, then you've misjudged his character and he's not high value.

careeningtracktor · 2021-01-20T16:51:31+00:00

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UniformFox_trotOscar · 2021-01-20T14:59:12+00:00

Something about the use of the phrase “tight little body” is really off-putting to read.

Moral of the story is this- it is easier to get in shape than it is to get a hot face so if you’re going to put effort in somewhere, work out and eat well.

FDSanon · 2021-01-20T12:52:02+00:00

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failureoftheseas · 2021-01-20T20:12:03+00:00

Bodies change over time, a lot more than the face does.

When you're in a long term relationship, you see that person so often so the subtle changes in their face aren't as apparent as you age together. It's only when you look back at old photos, do you realize how much both of you have changed.

delidoll · 2021-01-20T15:28:35+00:00

I would disagree with this post entirely...I’m not going to lie I don’t have the most amazing body it’s pretty average but I know I have a really pretty face. I’ve dated guys most would consider out of my league if you were just comparing bodies that have told me that my main feature that they were most attracted to was my face. I think a hot body helps for sure but most guys I’ve talked to (including my guy friends) say that face tops everything.

EGOtyst · 2021-01-21T06:10:28+00:00

Eh..... I am a face guy.

Face trumps body everytime.

I mean... a 1/10 on body aint gonna fly. But that is normally because of a lot of fat, which would effect the face anyway.

hepazepie · 2021-01-20T12:33:09+00:00

No. Its face-ass-tits in that order. Most men agree with me on that. Sometimes you get the odd tits over ass, but face comes always first

FDSanon · 2021-01-20T13:52:45+00:00

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pickles-n-noodles · 2021-01-20T14:26:47+00:00

Tbh I’ve heard the opposite. Men don’t like “shrimps” (this terminology comes from the fact that the shrimp body is good for consumption whereas the head is thrown out without much regard). There’s even a term called butterface (nice body, but her face..)

blueberrypanda1 · 2021-01-20T17:43:54+00:00

I think men care more about the body for one night stands and more about the face for longterm relationships as a general rule.

Of course varies man by man and by what his type is but I think there is another important element that needs to be considered.

When a high quality man looks for a wife, the most important thing he looks at is the kind of feminine energy a woman has, her qualities of being nurturing and a good mother in the future. He has to be attracted to her (or she wouldn’t be someone he would even consider this for) but at that point a high quality man would rather marry a 7 with the qualities of a great woman than a 10 with lesser qualities.

Also, a fun fact from my personal experience: men who were not breast fed tend to care more about women’s breast size than men who were. That is an other thread though.

xleolio · 2021-01-20T12:24:53+00:00

Cope

Trippytrapp · 2021-01-20T14:36:51+00:00

Another tip, as you long fit a niche/ or a mans “type” the standards are pretty lax in terms of face.

Advanced_Bar_673 · 2021-01-20T18:39:23+00:00

My female perspective is I think for hook ups a hot body is male priority, but for LTR a man wants to be able to see a pretty face day in, day out, and a pretty face is key to a lasting sexual chemistry. Many men love eye contact during sexual acts, love to watch a woman's face when she orgasms, love to watch her face doing all the sexy acts they fantasize about. And they love things like glasses and wigs and different makeup etc to create novelty. A man will not typically LTR a "butter face".

glittergrunge99 · 2021-01-20T15:45:04+00:00

Nah, body weight can change but a face is either pretty or it isn’t. No amount of plastic surgery would help with that one.

liao24 · 2021-01-21T00:31:25+00:00

I am a man and I approve of this message. Also y'all have make up. What about the opposite, a man with a sexy body and an ugly face?

teaandtalk · 2021-01-21T06:34:04+00:00

It's also not that hard to go from ugly face to cute. Learning a half-decent basic makeup and hair routine will put you above lots of women.

neoj8888 · 2021-01-21T11:11:43+00:00

I guess, but the face is just one small part of your body and it probably takes about 1/3 of the interest. So it’s disproportionate in relation to any other part of your body.

LexiFromWestchester · 2021-01-21T12:51:13+00:00

I think both areas are relatively easy to get a handle once you commit yourself to some goals. Weight can always be lost, a body can always get toned and a face can always be improved via makeup, skincare routines, cosmetic touches, etc. It's just getting into the proper mindset and finding the motivation at a consistent level.

2021-02-01T04:27:16+00:00

This is 100% right. Stop giving away our secrets!

Lol but no in all seriousness , you are 100% correct here

JAMESFTHE2ND · 2021-02-04T17:04:49+00:00

Yea as long as you're not obese we don't care. Guys will go for a nice set of legs any day of the week over a pretty face that is overweight.

stayPositive890 · 2021-01-20T15:38:51+00:00

Women should just learn to accept themselves. Of course, it is important to have a healthy body, but when it comes to face, learn to love how you look.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. A woman can be beautiful to one man, but ugly to another.

The confidence that radiates from loving yourself is all that matters. Don't worry about the men who don't find you attractive -- only care about the ones who do.

Edit: Don't know why people are down voting this. Do you want someone who won't accept you for who you are? Yes, it's important to exercise and have a healthy body, but you can never change your face. I don't care about men who don't find my face beautiful -- the ones who do are the ones who matter.

DBZBROLLYMAN · 2021-01-20T14:25:49+00:00

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.lehmiller.com/blog/2012/6/18/what-do-men-and-women-focus-on-when-they-watch-porn-the-answ.html%3fformat=amp

saint-jezebel · 2021-01-20T17:59:47+00:00

I watched a video recently and when asked to men what they really want in a woman, pretty face does not come up. Fit body is the first thing they say. And many times, when women lose weight, they lose excess fat on the face which hides a beautiful face anyway.

MusingsOfASoul · 2021-01-20T23:34:43+00:00

Interesting, I totally get the ETA part the OP mentions.

I am basically romantically (LTR) attracted to women but basically sexually attracted to men. A beautiful face is what can stir up those romantic feelings, not so much a body. However, I would still take that into consideration because I would want a partner that is healthy, and being healthy is "sexy", and chances are if you are not fit you are not close to optimally healthy.

JulianUNE · 2021-01-21T12:11:33+00:00

Emphasise your best features. Cover up your less attractive ones. Makeup can make a lot of difference. I don't believe appearance is irrelevant but I have genuinely known women who are just sexy despite not being very attractive. There is just something warm and cute about them. Womanly.

moneygang4life · 2021-01-25T12:42:04+00:00

They care about both. Also men’s standards for looks are lower than most women think.

2021-01-26T06:39:46+00:00

It makes me curious if it's any different for women? Do we prefer hot body's over face?

Men seem to care less about a perfect appearance than we expect. I think they're pretty much ok with everything average. That doesn't mean a perfect body isn't a much bigger turn on and beats the crap out of being 'ok'.

crampsalot · 2021-01-27T20:05:21+00:00

A person’s behavior/ personality are the deal-breakers (unless it’s understood to be short-term). Face and body are extras. Attractive body is of higher value to me than attractive face, however compatibilty/ kindness/ loyalty trump all. I am a successful physician happily married for over 30 yrs, so take it for what you think it’s worth. Again, kindness, loyalty, compatibility trump everything.

silentghost1846 · 2021-01-29T01:38:12+00:00

As a 20 year old male, I'd say most men my age check out a womens breast, butt, and stomach the most. The rest doesn't really matter much. But one thing that really turns us off is infidelity.

emmalai85 · 2021-01-20T16:27:05+00:00

My partner prefers me curvier in the butt than I like myself, and our girlfriend is very heavy. He prefers healthy over perfect. Submissive in personality makes a woman beautiful to him. Controlling, bitchy women turn him off. Doesnt matter how beautiful they are.

He wants nice, calm, Submissive and fun to be around who make his life more interesting. Easier isn't always the key part, but obedience is. He wants to be in charge.

Men want different things. Pick one that likes you, your wiring, put effort into the relationship and yourself and they likely will appreciate you.

Looks don't last forever, the intimacy and emotional bond is what makes it last a lifetime

MTB13579 · 2021-01-20T17:55:23+00:00

Can 100% agree with this. I was very used to constant attention from guys and then during a dark phase in my life I gained a lot of weight and was instantly invisible to men. I noticed how different I got treated. As I lost the weight the attention gradually came back. I don’t really understand it and I think it’s sad but men seem to be so grossed out by bigger women.

BrownGummyBear · 2021-01-21T00:19:44+00:00

The only guys who go for bigger girls are the ones who are fat themselves and can’t get better (with the rare chaser here and there).

Fit Body > Face. Unless the guy is also unfit that is

F33dR · 2021-01-26T02:18:45+00:00

This advice is trash. Most intelligent men prefer in this order: 1. Good character. 2. Pretty face. 3. A hot body. With dumb men the order may be different but you have to ask yourself; who is it you want to market yourself to? *I am a man. * The OP sounds like a woman. DO NOT take advice about what men want from women. I don't take advice about what women want from men, because i'm not stupid.

dasanman69 · 2021-02-16T17:36:45+00:00

I'll share a little secret with you ladies. The great equalizer is femininity. Right before the pandemic I went out with a group of friends that I regularly hang out with, mostly women, all quite attractive but this time there was a new girl.

She wasn't as pretty as the other girls and pretty much slim, small breasts and small butt but she was very feminine and I just couldn't help but give her all of my attention. I normally divide my attention in between all of the girls and they noticed that I wasn't doing that and afterwards joked about me liking the new girl. So work on your feminine energy, trust me it works.

DeepDaddyDeep · 2021-01-20T21:48:58+00:00

Confirmed.

Source: hetero male.

Muchadoaboutcass · 2021-01-20T21:58:48+00:00

This needs 1000x more upvotes.

This has an evolutionary biological explanation and is deeper than purely cultural.

This is about HEALTH and not necessarily obesity. Starving women do not look like child bearing candidates!

Also, the fitter you are the better you look at making good choices and being able to say no to self indulgence. This is sexy because you look like you’ve got self control and will essentially make a good mother.

Face is meh because anyone can have a pretty face with a good body. It’s about a whole package here ladies. Guys aren’t dumb.

FDSanon · 2021-01-20T19:00:38+00:00

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Hot_Connection_189 · 2021-03-20T16:02:40+00:00

No...it's the overall package...changing one thing changes it completely.

rerechan12 · 2021-12-10T04:46:58+00:00

Not that I disagree but I wish society standard for women also does the same for men cos I'd love for my husband to care about his body as much as I care about my own.

Title	PSA: men care a lot more about your body than your face
Author	FDSanon
Upvotes	246
Comments	151
Date	January 20, 2021 12:24 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	/r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/psa-men-care-a-lot-more-about-your-body-than-your.727846 https://theredarchive.com/post/727846
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/l185yb/psa_men_care_a_lot_more_about_your_body_than_your/