Been trying to improve myself and become a better girlfriend, RPW style, to improve my life in general and be the best I can. Its my main "2020 resolution"
Now that ive been actually trying to remain polite and non-naggy, I am realizing what an awful habit of nagging and 'suggesting', and overall being controlling I have. I can't believe my boyfriend has put up with it for so long, but im determined he won't have to for much longer!
Just some examples from only the first WEEK of 2020 that ive noticed myself doing...
-When I drive us somewhere and have the keys, I hit the lock button twice so it makes the beep sound. When my boyfriend locks the car, he does it once so it doesn't make the beep sound. In the past, practically EVERY TIME we are walking away from the car I ask "did you lock the car?" "is the car locked?", and he always says "yes." (becuase he is a grown man who can lock a car!) Its not that I don't trust him to lock the car, I just get the impulse to 'make sure' he did it. Not only do I do this with the car, I do it with letting the dogs out, giving the dogs food/water, turning the lights off when we leave the house, etc. How absolutely annoying must that be !! And if he did forget one of these small things once, who cares! Is our car really going to be hot wired in daylight in a safeway parking lot?
-I had made some money selling at a craft faire and had him put the money in his account from an ATM that was nearby, and had him paypal it to me. I was going to use it for various home projects when I had the time (and was rambling about it to him) Well when I got the paypal notification, it wasn't the same amount I had given him, it was short a lot of money! Instead of nagging him like I wanted to do ("where is the rest of the money??") I held my tounge. Thank god I did because he promptly used the money to get everything I had mentioned for me, the next time he was out.
-Nagging him to do daily outdoor chores. This I have the hardest time with!! we live out in the boonies of alaska, in quite a difficult (but hopefully temporary) situation off grid, and we have to do things like collect and boil our water, and carry heavy things in the snow. Which I would like to be his domain while I do cleaning and things in the house, and he is happy to do all those things himself. BUT, I am so impatient I will "remind" him 3 times, get a bad attitude, gear up and take it upon myself to do all the outdoor chores so they are "done in a timely manner" (whenever arbitrary time I decide they should be done by) then be cold and mad that he didnt do them already, when the poor man is just reading the morning news and has no idea why im grumpy. Ive found if I hold my tounge, and occupy myself with anything else, he will go do them with out me "reminding" him to do so once.
These are just from the first week so im sure there are more annoying things im doing that are making my relationship worse, I can already see improvements in the general house mood when I am not doing these things! I will update more as time goes on :)