So I know TRP desires women with low N-counts, having supposedly high N-counts themselves, but do any of you also prefer men with low N-counts?

LadyHelvetica · 2020-02-28T14:23:54+00:00

When I was single and dating, I always let men tell me about their past relationships and sexual history before I got involved with them. Many times, men revealed behavior I found absolutely abhorrent, and that was the last date we had. I think a disdain for promiscuous behavior is perfectly reasonable as it can be an indicator that a man doesn’t see the value in monogamy, thinks intimate relationships with women are disposable, and may also be carrying some lovely infectious diseases down there.

If you want to find a man who has remained celibate before marriage, I would recommend a religious community. I live in the Midwest USA and know a number of men in their early 20’s who are chaste and proudly saving themselves for marriage. They do exist.

novacanelipstick · 2020-02-28T18:05:32+00:00

I so agree. I would prefer to marry a virgin, and it's a big draw in if I find someone who is. If I meet a man who has a higher n-count, I could proceed with caution but if it was extremely high I would be very on edge. I dated a man who was older and did not convert to Christianity until a year or so before we began dating, and he refused to let me know his n count. It worried me for sure. Like what else is he hiding?

Cherry-Garcia- · 2020-02-28T15:53:05+00:00

I’ve never understood how men can have high n counts but want women with low n counts..... who are they sleeping with if not women!?

However, I do agree. I want someone with a moderate to low number.

LuckyPeaceful · 2020-02-28T15:35:20+00:00

A man with an extremely high N count is a turn off to me personally - specifically because it suggests he has a lot of one night stands and probably sees women as fleshlights with the unfortunate addition of a brain. Someone who has a high N count through jumping from short-term monogamous relationship to short-term monogamous relationship is also likely to be incapable of committing to a serious relationship. Either way, it's not attractive to me.

macedude · 2020-02-28T15:53:50+00:00

I sincerely appreciate your post. I admit that I have a religious bias (Christianity) which has a strong influence on my perspective and morality... but that is one of the only areas that I hear the term "purity" come up. My (27) fiancee (24) is a virgin (we are waiting until marriage) and I have slept with only one other person.

After my last relationship ended, I made a promise to myself that I would be celibate until marriage again. I know some people disagree but in my opinion... I find it difficult to think that individuals with a high body count will do exactly what you stated... value and cherish my decisions. I know that might not be entirely true, but it's a risk I didn't want to take. Even if it is psychological, I just feel that if a woman has been with 75 men... she is going to categorize me as "just another man."

Another potentially long-winded opinion of mine is that I think a person's perception of love and intimacy can get warped by those pre-marital sexual experiences. I read an opinion article once (I can share if desired) written by a pickup artist that made a bold claim that if a woman has been with more than two men, she will no longer associate sex completely inside a "love" context (as opposed to lust or appealing to sexual natures).

Anyway, in conclusion, both I and my fiancee desired someone who had low body counts too.

continuummmm · 2020-02-28T23:18:53+00:00

can someone plz clarify to me what do you mean by low, medium and high n-count? i'm a virgin, so for me everything seems high

theawaregirl · 2020-02-28T16:21:17+00:00

I do and always have preferred men with low N-counts. The type also plays a big role in my preference (I'd rather a man who had an N-count of 10, all with LTR's, than a man with an N-count of 6, all ONS's).

Why? Because it means we view sex in a similar way.

I don't want someone who thinks promiscuity is acceptable. I don't want a man whose been with every chick on the block. I don't want a man who doesn't connect sex and love and commitment. I don't want a man who sees sex as purely physical.

Why? Because I don't see sex that way, and I want someone who shares my values and worldviews.

BePrivateGirl · 2020-02-28T14:48:19+00:00

His prior experience with long term relationships, the way he talks about his exes and treats people around him, and his red flags are far more important to me than his n-count. That being said, if it's extremely low, I consider that a yellow flag and proceed with caution.

2020-02-29T01:55:15+00:00

I personally want someone with a moderate number (ideally 2-5). Having more partners is an indication of:

Considering intimacy disposable
The inability/lack of desire for monogamy
A need for multiple women over time
Impulsive behavior

Anthony1881 · 2020-02-28T22:51:19+00:00

I agree, why would I just want to be women who think all they have to do is shake their tail feathers and I'd let them into my inner sanctium, they get mad after awhile and think I'm not a real man like the dogs they're use to dealing with who are easily manipulated

2020-02-28T14:36:17+00:00

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thesillymachine · 2020-02-28T16:47:09+00:00

I am very glad I settled at a young age (20).

Yes, it was important to me because I wanted a religious man. Having that kind of patience and self control really says something about a man's integrity and values, self-worth. Societal norms can be really pressuring, especially for men. It's very easy to think it's weird to have men be 30 year old virgins, yet, there is something really special about him holding out and waiting for that special one who he marries. Talk about romance! It's probably unheard of outside of religion or someone with serious issues in today's age and I think that's really sad. We also have porn working against us. With technology it's super easy to access.

However, something to keep in mind is that men have it differently than we do as far as how our bodies work in regards to sex. They are visual and we are emotional. It's more challenging when you consider hormones and being caught in the heat of the moment.

2020-02-28T21:36:15+00:00

I wanted a man who had enough experience that he was ready to leave that part of life behind. It's also nice to have a guy who is confident leading in the bedroom.

I believe that low n men have a harder time resisting temptation (at least when we were dating age).

JimiJons · 2020-02-28T16:21:17+00:00

TRP only preaches a high male N-count because men have fewer pressures, both internal and external, to detach themselves from first loves and the "one-itis" that makes it difficult for them to leave unhealthy relationships or recover from break ups.

You're right that a high N-count, male or female, desensitizes someone to individual connection, but most men need this in order to be able to properly identify red flags and negative traits in partners and walk away.

Dancersep38 · 2020-02-29T01:48:21+00:00

I guess this is where everyone's opinion on what exactly constitutes high or low makes a huge difference in the answer.

Personally I never found any appeal in men who were virgins or had n-counts lower than mine. That said, I would also find a very high n-count unappealing, particularly if there was a lot of flagrant promiscuity. I went on a date with a guy once. I never got his n-count, but I'll never forget him telling me how he fingered some random MILF on the commuter rail and never even knew her name. The fact he did it is questionable enough but he was so goddamn proud of that fact; it was revolting.

Short answer: strongly prefer his count be higher than mine (single digit), but a count that starts hitting the 20s and 30s is pretty questionable and would need A LOT of compensating factors, to include self reflection on why he was so promiscuous, ESPECIALLY if most of those were ONS/ flings.

hintersly · 2020-02-29T02:55:56+00:00

I’m fairly new to TRP but I’ll give my two cents. Personally I would want a guy with a little experience if I were to date someone new. My boyfriend and I are each other’s first (both 18) but if something happened I’d want someone with at least one sexual partner.

Personally for me sex isn’t a big part of a relationship so I don’t really have a max limit to how many partners they’ve had as long as there was protection and a STI test

souadezz · 2020-02-29T19:06:58+00:00

I agree with op

Acrobatic-Stuff · 2020-03-01T08:24:18+00:00

I feel the same way, all my friends have had tons of sex of relationships and I haven't because I am waiting for the right woman and the rest does not interest me, it makes me feel lonely sometimes. My dream would be to met a girl who was really pretty, but decided to remain pure, an impossible dream right now since the most atractive females I've found are with guys with expensive cars

jfiscal · 2020-02-28T18:04:52+00:00

I'm pretty sure everyone prefers low n counts and uh... Normal n encounters

A dude with 100 notches on his bed post probably beats out the guy with 50 notches that were all hardcore BDSM painplay notches. But I'm pretty sure both lose to the guy who's only had an HS gf and a college gf.

But what do I know

2020-02-29T02:39:09+00:00

I'm in a weird situation where my SO has a high body count, just not as high as mine. We both don't care. I know this is RPW and that's not the norm but I just wanna say, no one should feel ashamed of their past to the point it affects their present when theyre trying to be a better more healthy person. I've never cared what the body count of my SO was, but that might be because my own was so high. As long as he's committed, stable, respectful, and strong, I've never cared. People can change. It took finding the right man for me to realize the life I was living before was less than good, and sometimes it's the same for men. 2 years and pseudo-engaged, it's worked out well.

CochinoChingon · 2020-03-01T07:34:19+00:00

I come from a Latinx background, Machismo which most misinterpret as alpha, but it's more like "family alpha with perks". As in take care of you family, put their needs first, once their taken care of your reward is to fool around as you please, just don't get attached. This is both spoken "a real man has been with a ton of women!" and unspoken wives look the other way so long as the other woman remains a fling and the kids don't know about it.

So with that, and a few other things that happened in my life my n-count would be appalling to women and unbelievable to men. But I realized in my 30s that I am a sex addict, got help for it and ended up with a wonderful woman who didn't care about my n-count, what was important was how I got along with her and how I carried myself. Sadly she passed away nearly 4 years ago.

As to what I desire in a woman, her n-count is not important to me in the least. I'm more concerned with if her kid(s) all have the same father, though my preference is no kids (I don't know a 40+ woman that would meet this desire) I fall back to kid(s) being out of the house. Then again, I don't see myself commiting long term again, and I am upfront about that.

Throwaway230306 · 2020-02-28T19:51:13+00:00

When I was single, I would have felt less attracted to a man who admitted to being a virgin or had a very low n count.

I once briefly dated a guy who was raised in a religious family and, in his mid 20s, had been with just one woman. When we talked about having sex, I found myself feeling like I would be corrupting him! It made me feel like I was being placed in the man's role in the relationship.

As a kind of shy and sexually unsure person when I was dating, I preferred to be led by a more experienced partner.

,(Now, there's a limit to how much "experience" is good in my view--dozens and dozens of past lovers is also a yellow or red flag, points to getting bored quickly, habit of plating women, more chance of disease, etc).

I don't know how many women my husband has been with--I think it's a fairly reasonable number that's higher than my own modest one, which is perfect.

I admit I kind of find it sexy when my husband shares bits from his "past"--like, when he was in college, he had sex with a girlfriend at a playground that's in our part of town. When we drive past that playground I'll punch his arm and tease him about knowing that playground intimately, and then we'll laugh and I'll get a pleasant rush of attraction tinged by a little jealousy.

There's a reason that pretty much every romantic novel written for women, bodice ripper or classic, has a virginal heroine and a hero with a past. It's somehow more appealing than a virginal hero, or even two experienced lovers.

pearlsandstilettos · 2020-02-28T14:19:42+00:00

TRP teaches that whereas a woman need a reason to have sex with you, a man just need a place.

I tend to think that a woman must have an emotional attachment to have sex with a man and the society and years of evolution ingrained this as a slutty behaviour whenever a woman would sleep with a couple of guys.

On a male perspective, most have sex as a sign of validation, being desired and masculinity. Again it is a mammalian male biological instinct to spread his seeds all over thus the numbers.

For me I prefer female with a relative average n count to a virgin.

Bobolink911 · 2020-02-28T16:08:45+00:00

No woman wants a virgin man. If that were the case there wouldnt be as man 20 and 30 year old virgins. A virgin man is valueless, a woman can sell her virginity for 800k.. which a few have..

Title	So I know TRP desires women with low N-counts, having supposedly high N-counts themselves, but do any of you also prefer men with low N-counts?
Author	sabsz16
Upvotes	108
Comments	86
Date	February 28, 2020 1:36 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	/r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/so-i-know-trp-desires-women-with-low-n-counts.341168 https://theredarchive.com/post/341168
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/faut7x/so_i_know_trp_desires_women_with_low_ncounts/