~ archived since 2018 ~

Some great things my father taught me.

July 19, 2020

I saw a post on PurplePillDebate by a self-described Redpilled father wanting to give his 11-year old daughter advice for the future. He had some very good propositions, but a lot of others seemed fraught and fear-driven, and seemed to almost push for making one’s entire life revolve around the search for a man. I think it’s too late to comment on the post as it’s been a few months, so I wanted to give my 2 cents. That post got me thinking quite a bit.

I come from what I guess you’d call a “RedPilled” practicing Catholic household with happily married parents. The advice my dad gave me, he gave me as a teenager and it was very different. I realize what a remarkable place it’s led me to. A few tidbits stand out to me:

  • “Find things that you love to do, and that give you meaning. Invest in pursuits that will carry you through the long-term.”
  • ”Befriend quality people, and associate with people who challenge you to be better. There’s no such thing as rescuing people or bringing them up to your wavelength. Unfortunately, you only get dragged down in the process.”
  • ”When you meet a special man one day, make sure he’s someone you can respect deeply and who respects you too.”
  • ”Do not rush into something with the first person who gives you butterflies. People take time to unfold. Watch carefully and stand your ground.”
  • ”Find a marketable skillset to fall back on for security. Hone and develop it.” This one, I think I should expand upon. My dad is a financier with a knack for discerning pretty far into the the future on matters of economics, global politics, market events etc. and I don’t regret following his advice one bit.
  • ”Try to develop daily competence and excellence in every area of life. The small things matter, and it’s important to be functioning responsibly and effectively as an adult. This will give you time to focus on what’s important.”
  • ”Stay off your phone.”... that one is easier said than done lol
  • ”Always do unto others what you would have them do unto you, always hold yourself to the same standard of behaviour you expect out of those who are important to you in your life.”

Just a few of them, but they’ve stayed with me. Thought I’d share. My parents’ theory on relational success was simple— it’s that like attracts like. Fullness of character attracts fullness of character, competence attracts competence, etc. You can’t stagnate, wallow or be lazy and then expect magic to happen, and that’s the entire problem of the general culture coddling people and telling them that they’re just fine as they are.

Did always listen? No. But now I do, and it’s led me to a much better place over the past four-five years.

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[–]barooka19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great tips in general! Please post a full-version. You were raised right

[–]MotznRoth7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

All of this is wonderful advice! Your father was a wise man. My parents divorced when I was very young, and I was raised by a NASA rocket scientist mum who, genius that she is, was not always the best at common sense.

You are so lucky to have this man in your life, and grown up with such advice. I'll bet this helped you become a fantastic and well - rounded person. :)

[–]TheMaddOne155 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

These are all so wonderful! I was wondering if you might be able to expand on developing daily competence and what that looks like for you? It’s something I’ve been trying to work on lately but I feel very far away from being competent at a lot of “adult” things!

[–]Attempt_Historical4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My Dad said similar things to me. He's a great Dad. Even if our political views do not match , he still loved me. He taught me about all the great people in history and when I was lost in life , he taught me the value of writing and creating. I just fear if he finds out I want to be a housewife , he'll be sad.

[–]stevierose7892 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think it’s too late to comment on the post as it’s been a few months, so I wanted to give my 2 cents. That post got me thinking quite a bit.

I wish you could post it on TRP. I think alot of men would benefit from reading this.

[–]DelicateDevelopment1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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