We often refer to the relationship as the "Captain and First Mate Dynamic". The Captain is in charge of the ship, and the First Mate follows his lead. The term "First Mate" is used to mean that the women is not a passive bystander on the ship, or in the relationship. A competent First Mate can be relied on to take on duties that the Captain is not in the best position to do. These are the tasks that women are best suited for, or duties that the Captain is unable or unwilling to do. If the First Mate performs her essential duties, then the ship will run smoothly and the relationship will be a peaceful and happy one.

I have categorized the essential duties of the First Mate into 5 categories. They are:

  • Morale Officer
  • Reporting Ship Status
  • Carrying-out Assigned Duties
  • Supporting Your Captain
  • Ship Maintenance

Morale Officer

The First Mate's main duty is to keep spirits on the ship high. This becomes especially important to keep in mind when there are sources of tension. Being the Morale Officer means you are the soft place to land. You are not only a huge source of joy in his life, you are more often the solution to his problems, rather than the creator of them. You are not the cause of his headaches, you are the person he turns to that can relieve them. You are there to cure tension. The following techniques are a grab-bag of possibilities, use the ones the best suit your lifestyle. The more the better!

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