~ archived since 2018 ~

Thoughts for the week

March 26, 2017

Just mulling over some RPW thoughts from the week and wanted to share.

1. I saw a middle aged couple eating together at a restaurant. The woman was still attractive for her age. However, she talked the entire time and treated her husband like a girlfriend, and she did all the ordering of food/drink. I observed how the husband just sat there and nodded to her, agreeing with her. He didn't look unhappy or angry, but he looked pretty bored and just going through the motions of listening to her. Then a young attractive waitress came over while the wife was in the bathroom, and she complimented the man on his watch - and then he started telling the story of his watch. You could tell he was excited to talk about something of his life rather than just monotonously nodding to his wife.

2. I live in a country where there's an apparent difference between housewives and working women. The housewives are actually proud that they don't have to work - because they were able to get married to a man who was willing to take care of them. There's no shaming of the SAHM/SAHW lifestyle here, whereas if you're a working woman, depending on your situation, people pity you for needing to work because you're a single woman. Anyways, last night our school had an event, and I was actually slightly jealous of the women who were with the families while I was running around trying to manage the event...funny how different cultures can have different takes on housewife lifestyle.

3. I'm friends with a woman at work who is 36 and single, and most likely she will never get married because she's obese and a shrew. I chat with her sometimes and I noticed she reacts very intensely to the news - such as the electronics ban on certain airlines from the Middle East to the US, and how our government sponsor is laying off a lot of people lately. But her reaction is very different - she's angry to the point of being wrathful. Not sure if it's because she's single so she has to take care of everything herself, but I know that I personally don't react as strongly to most news - worried, yes, but not anger. I also know another 34yo single and obese woman who is like this.

4. My infamous investment banker friend with the cheating husband (I'm not criticizing her because she's wonderful to me, but as my boyfriend says..."listen and learn"), she's starting a real estate company. She's super intelligent, successful and business like, to the point of criticizing everyone because she's had so much success and experience. But I feel I can't enjoy my time with her, she's always talking about business and she doesn't ask questions about you. And I noticed in general, I feel unsettled and not nurtured by women who just tell you what to do.

Any thoughts? Reactions? Personal stories you can relate to?

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Post Information
Title Thoughts for the week
Author vanBeethovenLudwig
Upvotes 8
Comments 24
Date March 26, 2017 4:54 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit /r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link
Original Link
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[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Hello :)

I wanted to comment on your fourth point. This is something I've been thinking about a lot actually. I'm in a point in life where I really want to cultivate more friendships with other women but I'm finding it so difficult because I'm surrounded by feminist-minded women who only want to dominate conversations and have the power in a relationship. I started wondering, is it even possible for women to have genuine friendships where competition and one-upping isn't a problem and we can all simply support and encourage one another? Because I agree with you, I feel very unsettled by women who do this in an aggressive way. It seems to hinder any true connection. Also, I feel it is so difficult to be around people who don't ask questions about you because, again, there's no true connection and they're kind of using you to make them feel better about themselves. It feels wrong.

Also for your second point, I really wish where I lived respected SAHW/SAHMs! I got married and wanted to live this lifestyle and everyone in my family thinks I'm being held against my will. Gr! I wish it was different.

Just wanted to add my simple comments!

[–]crimsonrpw points points [recovered] | Copy Link

I started wondering, is it even possible for women to have genuine friendships where competition and one-upping isn't a problem and we can all simply support and encourage one another?

I worry about this too! It's a problem because I have a real desire for female companionship and connection in my life - but sometimes it seems like a friend who genuinely wants the best for you is hard to find. Sure, they're happy if you do well, but only as long as you're doing less well than they are. Funnily enough, I have found this to be an equal issue with gentle, traditional-minded women. The competition is more subtle and passive-aggressive, but it's still there. I've certainly met a lot of soft-spoken feminine women who will quietly undermine female friends they see as rivals for male approval. It's really sad.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I found I get along most with older, married women with children because there's really no competition there.

[–]tempintheeastbayEndorsed Contributor2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I agree, I find this problem exists with women across the spectrum of life choices. Older married women with children (in my part of the world) are often wildly passive aggressive and competitive. "MY child is a whole grade level ahead in reading!" "Well MY child is an artistic genius!" "Oh it's SO hard having such a GIFTED little child"

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I laughed because just two minutes before your comment, I said the exact opposite - that I get along with married women with children, haha!

[–]tempintheeastbayEndorsed Contributor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

haha that is a funny coincidence... I think being obnoxious in that way is a universal issue across marital statuses and ages :p

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Observation #3 tends to agree with other posts I have read about voter breakdown by gender/marital status in the recent USA election. Married female voters favored the conservative candidate as did most men, while single females were more inclined to the female liberal candidate. I never saw a martial status breakdown of the feminist marches on Washington but I just can't imagine to many happily married women wearing gynecologicaly correct pussy hats

[–]Starletblonde5 points6 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

Does anyone ever wonder if women are drawn to asking questions about someone else as a way to gather information about a person to built a mental file on them so they can later us that information for manipulation purposes (consciously or subconsciously). Looking at things from a primal aspect, men use brute force to survive, women need manipulation, cunningness, and whit. Like the old adage men have brawn women have brain (or something like that). Just a thought.

[–]Gardrothard4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

if women are drawn to asking questions about someone else as a way to gather information about a person to built a mental file on them

That's exactly why I do it. Don't know about the others.

Information is the only power women have.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Hmm, I will have a mental file on them, but as to using it for evil manipulation??? I don't really know how to do that...

[–]Gardrothard2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't use it for that either. Mostly when someone's down, I use it to cheer them up by complimenting on the nice things that most people wouldn't notice about them, but they would appreciate.

[–]Willow-girl2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Skills and abilities count for nothing?

[–]Gardrothard2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Well, most of women's skills and abilities require knowledge and information. What I meant is that it's very hard to rely on physical power if you're a woman.

[–] points points | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]Gardrothard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

They don't fight each other, but many do physically abuse women.

Also, it's not just fighting, it's also a whole set of jobs that they are able to do because of their strength.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Can you give an example of how a woman would use her mental file of another person for manipulation purposes?

[–]Starletblonde2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Manipulation doesn't have to equate to evil. It can be simple or complex. Used for good or bad.

I'll give a very very elementary example. Man likes a women in pigtails. Women ascertains this information through conversation (most likely perpetuated by women's questions (doesn't need to be direct question of "do you like pigtail)). Women wears pigtails knowing man likes this. Man see pigtails and his pleasure receptor spikes up. Manipulation has been performed because the women artificially increased the males please receptor based on altering her look using information she obtained from him.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I would agree to this. I mean, that's why women wear low cut tops right? To show off cleavage because they know men like it? But in your comment it seemed like you were insinuating women keep mental file on other women, not men, for manipulation purposes.

[–]Starletblonde1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Really? Ok a very very simplistic woman to woman example.

Woman knows her woman friend loves wine. Women needs help picking out an outfit to go to a wedding in. Women friend says ugh, I don't feel like going shopping today, I have my period. Woman says I'll buy you a bottle of your favorite wine if you come. Women friend says ok. Women used knowledge of woman's friends love for wine to manipulate her into going shopping with her to help pick out a wedding dress.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ok, yes I see what you're saying. Putting bribery aside, I'll do things like not talk about a certain subject or only talk about a certain subject around a girlfriend if I know she's interested about those things. I do know many of the men I know don't really know when something is offensive to say around other people, whereas I think women are more cunning in this sense.

Or with the example of my wrathful colleague, although she's quite humorous most of the time, I stay away from her because I know she can get wrathful and I prefer not to be in the vicinity of women like that (characteristics often rub off).

[–]Starletblonde2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I manipulated a boss once for two years straight into think I liked her and was her friend. Did and said all the things she wanted out of a subordinate (based on a 2+ hour speech she gave me when I was hired on what she wanted and what others gave hold her are her poor qualities). I told her I didn't see any of the said poor qualities and mimicked everything she wanted (beyond work duties type stuff). She would call me at night to chat, invite me and hubby to dinner and outings. She really thought I liked her and was her perfect subordinate/friend.

My mistake was even attempting this since after 2 years I wanted to blow my brains out because all the poor qualities were true and I hated every ounce of her. By the 2.5 year mark a VP told her what I really thought bc I was an idiot and told the President my thoughts. She acted like her soul was literally being crushed. Crying and all - more than once. By the 3 year mark I quit bc the environment was beyond damage control. That boss was beyond the scope of a well functioning human - major personality issue. But I used what she told me to put her in my pocket for 2 years.

[–]Landry860 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I don't understand why people get so worked up about the news. I'm so self-absorbed that I don't pay attention to the news because it doesn't affect my life. but I hear there is a virtue in selfishness. Thank you Ayn Rand

[–]skipperupper1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well I'm sorry but a lot of stuff do affect our lives. There's nothing wrong by being well read and educated and have a general understanding of the current politics. I would even argue that makes for deeper conversations with your man and both he and I appreciate being intellectually stimulated by discussing world events or politics. What I do agree with however is to keep emotions out of it and try to always take an objective stand to the topic at hand.

[–]vajeni0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

People who don't want to face the realities in their small circle or feel lack of control in their own lives often obsess over things they have no control over, like the news.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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