Vulnerability

[deleted] · 2018-02-10T17:04:20+00:00

For me, vulnerability was opening up and allowing myself the potential to be hurt. As Brene Brown said, "I define vulnerability as uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure."

WonderfulandValuable · 2018-02-10T17:13:32+00:00

I think to be truly able to allow oneself to open up one needs resilience to bounce back from hurt and negativity and Intuition. Cause being vulnerable is like a blood trace in the water. Those that mean harm know. I have seen it too many times. I am Abe to let my walls down but I also let my intuition tell me if something is off. Intuition is a wonderful thing, one of the female strengths. It takes nurturing and self control but it is a great aid and guide. Maybe if more women took the time and effort to hone their Intuition They would feel more comfortable to approach the world with openness.

vanBeethovenLudwig · 2018-02-10T19:51:00+00:00

Vulnerability is showing my flaws and weaknesses, my "craziness" and being open to either being accepted for them or rejected for them.

Another user once said, vulnerability is the possibility of rejection. Unfortunately you can't develop deep love without being vulnerable and letting someone see deep down who you are.

[deleted] · 2018-02-10T22:44:56+00:00

Vulnerability to me is exposure of my innermost thoughts, my body, my needs and desires, and anything else I hold intimate.

Many people go to their graves never feeling vulnerable. Being vulnerable to another in my opinion is the greatest gift you can offer someone. But also letting someone be vulnerable with you is a priceless gift.

The good news about vulnerability is you can go slow and use your intuition as a compass for navigating that space

Rivkariver · 2018-02-10T20:52:29+00:00

Having “soft” emotions and not trying to cover them up and act tough.

carefreevermillion · 2018-02-11T19:41:47+00:00

I think it's being afraid of the possibility of rejection and opening up anyways. I'm a prideful control freak and hate being vulnerable, but I've learned to let my boyfriend see my soft side and take care of me because even when I'm at my most anxious or depressed, he is steady and guides me through whatever I'm dealing with.

Edit: if I was telling a girlfriend who struggled with it what to do, I would tell her to say "I'm having a tough time with my feelings" then to take a minute to write them down or just breathe, and then open up.

[deleted] · 2018-02-11T23:19:08+00:00

I have fought being vulnerable (which to me means being helpless) for most of my life and three decades of my marriage. I hate showing tears to anyone and have done a pretty good job of keeping them under wraps until I could have a melt down and a crying jag in private. In spite of my efforts, I still was vulnerable and my husband was fully aware of it. I may have had a smile on my face and sailed through the motions of getting shit done, but he always knew. It wasn't until years into our marriage that he could take one look at me and know immediately that I was upset about something. Now he will coax it out of me and in doing so take the weight off of my shoulders. As for instinct, to me it is the nagging instistence to act in spite of everything telling you not to.

[deleted] · 2018-02-12T09:14:32+00:00

That's something you get into after you've made sure you're not dealing with a guy with narcissistic tendencies or otherwise pathological issues. Some guys like this start by trying to drill into it right away, investigating for your imperfections, flaws and insecurities to create to themselves a solid reason not to commit.

This doesn't smell like a potentially good dynamic.

Vulnerability, to me, is a part of true intimacy - you can trust your partner will hold trough and not against you, if you announce to him the darkest sides of you. You'll not be pressurized to talk about it, and the guy is well-rounded enough to understand that there's an amount of flaws and darkness in each person - including himself.

I'm thinking if it looks like a guy is unable or unwilling to feel shame and cleverly keeps pushing your buttons to reveal the nasty - there's a good chance this guy won't be likely to admit to being vulnerable himself - and he just might stretch into the crazymaking territory in the longer term. A bidirectional connection will be impossible.

It's fine if you want to be open to any next guy, but remember, there's always risk involved and you're the only one who is going to suffer as a consequence if things turn out crazy. But suppose, it's a part of life and not really a sin to trust. After a few times of failures, it might be concerning and foolish, though :)

[deleted] · 2018-02-11T04:48:07+00:00

To me it's utter honesty directed at myself and being able to accept that I am imperfect and strive for more.

Title	Vulnerability
Author	vanBeethovenLudwig
Upvotes	18
Comments	11
Date	February 10, 2018 2:06 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	/r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/vulnerability.74233 https://theredarchive.com/post/74233
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/7wllqq/vulnerability/