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"Whatever it is, we're in it together" - My husband is a rock and I need to tell someone.

_Pumpkin_Muffin
August 9, 2022
151 upvotes
/r/RedPillWomen

Just found out I don't have cancer.

It's been an agonizing 40 days of waiting and tests and waiting and visits and more waiting. F'ing cancer? NOW? I just turned 26. I just got married. I want to have kids like yesterday!

I just walked out of the doctor office and a huge weight shifted off my chest.

I can't wait to get home to my husband and dissolve into a puddle of tears in his arms.

I DON'T HAVE CANCER.

He's been such a rock through it all. I briefly considered not telling him anything until I got the answer, but a) it would have been so wrong b) I can't keep secrets, let alone THIS secret c) he would have chewed my head off.

He was THERE. He looked straight at me and told me that whatever it was, we'd be in it together. I'm so relieved it wasn't it.

"Are you worried?" "No, no. It just sucks that I have to wait for the tests." He held me tight anyway. This man. I didn't fool anyone.

These are the only negative tests I'm happy about these days. I don't have cancer. Just an infertility problem - well, we already suspected there'd be one. So more waiting and tests and visits and waiting. That's another can of worms I'm so scared to deal with. But - it was nice to rule out cancer... :)

He's taking me out to eat tonight.

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Post Information
Title "Whatever it is, we're in it together" - My husband is a rock and I need to tell someone.
Author _Pumpkin_Muffin
Upvotes 151
Comments 21
Date August 9, 2022 9:16 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit /r/RedPillWomen
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/whatever-it-is-were-in-it-together-my-husband-is-a.1127059
https://theredarchive.com/post/1127059
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/wjyn4l/whatever_it_is_were_in_it_together_my_husband_is/
Red Pill terms in post
long term relationship
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Comments

[–]Environmental_Ad58673 Stars 24 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Your husband sounds like an absolute gem. Treasure him and remember these moments.

I had a cancer scare too earlier this year and the whole ordeal terrified me. My partner took time off his work to attend the appointments with me and sat through the whole procedure while I held his hand shaking like a leaf (I had a reaction to the anaesthetic). It’s just one of the many times he’s ‘showed up’ in my life to help support me through difficult times. I’m truly lucky to have him and I love him to the moon and back.

Best of luck for the rest of your journey OP. One step at a time but it sounds like you’ve got a great partner to weather this through together. hug

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you. Yeah the whole ordeal sucks. Glad to hear it was just a scare for you too.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think it's beautiful how the news is that you don't have cancer, and you come here to gush about your husband. :)

My boyfriend is like that too: I can't fool him. He always knows when I'm upset, even when I clam up and try to pretend nothing's wrong. And he always makes things better.

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He was THE thing that made it bearable. He deserves the recognition :)

[–]VasiliyZaitzevTRP Senior Endorsed 15 points16 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

First, congrats on not having cancer.

Second, your husband sounds like a great guy.

Third, I hope it goes without saying that you should tell him this, and how much you appreciate him, etc. Men can survive on a compliment from 4 years ago, but it's always nice to hear.

Finally, good luck with the fertility issues.

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Thank you! I do tell him, very often. We are both very open about it. He keeps a photo diary for me and I keep a journal/write letters for him. He deserved to hear about my gratitude - this whole ordeal made me so anxious, irritable, a complete mess. I really had to make a conscious effort to be softer, and it wasn't easy. I don't know if he noticed the effort it took me, but he really stepped up after that.

And since I told him (showed him) that I appreciate him for stepping up and leading, he does so even more...

Am I conditioning him with positive reinforcement? :)

[–]VasiliyZaitzevTRP Senior Endorsed 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

{Wholesome.}

[–]HumanSockPuppetTRP Founder 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I don't know if he noticed the effort it took me, but he really stepped up after that.

He noticed.

And since I told him (showed him) that I appreciate him for stepping up and leading, he does so even more...

Proof right here.

Am I conditioning him with positive reinforcement? :)

You are. And he is conditioning you with his care, leadership, and protection. You are both mutually-reinforcing, and you are both stronger and happier because of it.

Funny, it's almost like we evolved to do this.

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, it's a dynamic that definitely works when it plays into both partners' inclinations. I'm not a big fan of evolutionary psychology but I'll happily take what works for me :)

[–]rprollerEndorsed Contributor 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

So happy for you that you don't have cancer!! Eff cancer

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks :)

[–]Hot-Economy5639 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

So happy for you guys. Glad to hear he was WITH you all the way.

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He definitely was. Thank you.

[–]Adorable_Air_3294 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

One of the most heartwarming posts I've read in a long time. SO happy for you both!! Much love and good luck 💞🍀

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

:)

[–]VictoriaSobocki 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Awww that sounds amazing

[–]warm20 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Congratulations not only you don't have cancer but you have one of the best men on earth! Happy for you :)

[–]_Pumpkin_Muffin5 Stars[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Thanks. He might be good but he's obviously dumb, he says HE's the lucky one.

[–]warm20 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

he is lucky because you recognize that in him many would underappretiate him

you both are great bless you both

[–]Both_Republic9915 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

i’m happy your healthy and i hope with all my heart you beat your other issue. I personally don’t have any children of my own but i do hope to one day have 1 or 2 and i wish you the same good luck

[–]king_maphuti 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Awesome stuff.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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