I'm in the military and I work on my command's computer networks.

In the past two years I've had difficulty getting funding and leadership backing behind many of our much needed upgrades to our IT infrastructure. Probably because I would whine about it and wasn't good at communicating my needs.

In one particular struggle, without getting too detailed, I've been asking for a better server that will help better and faster access to information. Every 3 months or so, there will be a huge surge in needed information, and the senior leadership can't access it in a timely manner. Each time this happens they come after me with pitchforks and torches demanding answers. In the past, I would feel angry and insulted because I took that shit personal. Being so angry wouldn't allow me to effectively communicate as to why they don't have the information they're looking for. I would even sink to blaming other's that fund us just to get them off my back. It was always a sad pathetic mess. Eventually they would grumble and forget about it but the problem would still not be solved. I would just wait until it came back again, trying in vain to get the funding I needed, but I did it in a way that was ineffective.

Today, the issue was raised again. I had an E-9, E-8, and a E-7 march into my office demanding what's wrong and why can't they get the information they needed.

Since swallowing the Red Pill, I've been practicing frame in all areas of life, especially work and women. I calmly told them that the reason they don't have the information is due to the technical limitations of our network, and this is how we can fix them with the right funding and a different change in command policy when accessing this information. Whenever the E-9 tried to again pin it on me, I again calmly redirected the issue to what is actually going on and not getting personal about it. This lasted about 10 minutes, and each time I explained in clear non-jargon way what I need to fix the problem, and how he can help me get it.

Slowly the senior leader came to my side, and walked out the door but not before saying he was going to talk to the Executive Officer about getting the funding I need and to sit down and have me hash out a change in policy when it comes to accessing our networks, that would be supported from the top-down. An hour later a co-worker commented on how I was always "cool, calm, and collected" and it's something she admires.

This wouldn't have happened without the Red Pill and all I've been practicing since taking that plunge. Thanks for anyone that contributes to better understanding these vital topics.