So I have to do this because I work with feminazis who know my actual reddit account. So hush, but I do look forward to the day when this doesn't matter anymore. Anywho on with the tales of wonder.

I never took the red pill by choice, or maybe I did. To put it simply, I was the poster child of the blue pill. Raised by my mother alone, taught to respect women, to do anything for a woman, and to just be a "good" guy to women.

My friend is the complete opposite, and I hated him for it. I thought he was abusive and all around just a horrible man. Calling women sluts and whores, and just randomly grabbing women that walked by him. He got laid, a lot. He pulls me and a few of his buds aside and tell us about the Red Pill, and how it made him who he was. I wanted nothing to do with that kind of rude and disrespectful behavior. It wasn't right, right?

I don't know what made me come to red pill in the end. Maybe it was the gift of Pimp with Jullian my friend got me, or maybe it was this causing dread of being alone that got to me, but I finally came to the red pill. I was disgusted at what I saw.

The games women played on us all. How they acted, and so much more. An insight into a world I never knew was there, and me. Every subject regarding Beta males was there right in my face at ever turn. If beta was there, I had done it. So now we fast forward.

I can count on one hand the amount of women I have slept with (well I use to be able to :D). As such I had always been fascinated by the female form and how women felt. On hindsight this was because I was so sexually starved that even a hug was too physical for me. Oh yeah, I was that kind of beta who would go to a club and everyone would be dancing and I was a stiff pillar of excitement. I shied away from most to all physical contact. Now this manifests in just plain I like how women feel. So I try to be more physical more often.

I learned that my personality tends to be rather wacky. My friend who showed me red pill basically said I take people into a whole different universe of weird. So let me tell you about a particular event that made me realize how far the red pill had taken me.

The crew (all the men who study RSD Nation and Red Pill, basically 5 of us) do our pre-game. A shot of whatever and a trip to our "den." At the "Den" we talk about our strengths and our weaknesses. We go over our game for tonight and try to nail down logistics on the women. Are we going for Day2 phone game, or we aiming for tonight? Then we hit our inner game. For each of us, it's different. In my case I start amusing myself on everything. It was a game my mom used to play with me. It pretty much goes, "how do you describe such and such thing if you didn't come from Earth?" So I start studying my surroundings as if this was my first and last day here on Earth. I watch as the women start dancing, and I look at the beverages and just enjoy myself giving zero fucks about what anyone says or does.

Then comes the game. I have a bubble around me, anyone who comes into this bubble I talk to and open. On one particular night I had come across a women who was really cute. She was walking by and I grabbed her and began waltzing with her. By grab her I mean I raised my hand to high five her, she high fived me, but I kept her hand and then reached around to the mid of her back and began waltzing with her. She looked utterly confused. I told her that I believe it is traditional to dance and a club. She laughed. We got to talking, and she proceeded to shit test me, and this is where I lost it. I laughed a little and then pushed her away smiling. I said, "Ah yes, the shit test. I had heard females do this some times. Don't worry, I think you are a wonderful person and you don't need to validate yourself. Don't worry about, you're cool in my book." She became flustered.

I kept talking to her and listening to her. Eventually her friends came up to her asked who I was. I hushed them and picked up the girl I was talking to and rotated her 180 so her back was to her friends. I looked at her friends and said, "Mine. My studies aren't done yet." Then I dragged her to random places and did incredibly corny dance moves. The Lawnmower, the Shopping Cart, the Running Man, I had all the moves.

Suffice it to say when the club closed she didn't want to leave my side, but my logistics weren't there so I got her number.

I guess what I want to really say is that thank you Red Pill for giving me to myself. There's no more social anxiety when I go outside anymore. I don't think about people trying to hurt me, or that I might upset them. I can talk to women and not be stupid about it. This one is really important to me. So if it gets a bit deep, skip to the bold text.

I sometimes thought that I was utterly worthless and that people would probably be better off without me in their lives. I would cut my arms and legs with knives or other sharp stuff to punish myself for being such a horrible person. I thought I deserved the pain and scars. I thought about killing myself so many times. I wanted to die and make people's lives easier. Not any more. I wake up happy. I go outside happy. Every single day that goes by is a new adventure. I am doing to the world, not the world doing to me. I wish I could explain to you all the fog that was cleared from my head. I am truly happy God made me a man, and I thank every breath I take. I walk down the street with a smile on my face. Sometimes, I do that really embarrassing thing where you make yourself laugh but you don't want to show so you make weird faces. That's my life now. It's fun and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

TL;DR: Thanks, Red Pill, I have no doubt you saved my life. You gave me a chance to live again, and I can never repay what you gave me. Keep being awesome, and don't drink my koolaid. It's fruit punch flavored and the best. Hence mine.