Actions and Reactions

Back in the early 2000s, while I was still in middle school, I was at a neighbor’s house with some of his friends playing Super Smash Bros. My neighbor was without a doubt the most popular male in our school (super athletic and cool), and his friends were comprised of others from the upper echelon of the social hierarchy. I was decidedly not in the same hierarchy as them, but we hung out from time to time due only to the close proximity in which we lived.

As is to be expected when a bunch of dudes are playing competitive video games, there was a lot of part friendly, part hostile trash talking going on. At one point in the game, I made a joke about one of the more socially dominant guys relying on an overpowered move in the game. I was immediately shunned and embarrassed to the soundtrack of other’s laughter. Not ten minutes later, my ultracool neighbor made the exact same joke. Like clockwork, everyone around him burst out laughing and applauded him for his extremely clever and poignant joke. Same joke, same crowd, different comedians, different response.

I mention all of this because it taught me a valuable lesson early on. Namely, that your choice of words words and actions have almost no impact on the way said words and actions are perceived. It is not what you do, but rather who you are.

I mention this, because I think this is where almost all pickup artist trickery goes wrong. You can say the exact same words, use the exact same kino, and wear the exact same outfit as, say, Mystery, and it will almost always yield a different result.

Those of you who have been around a while should know exactly why this is. It breaks down to social status (which I use to mean the combination of leadership achieved, abilities and skill levels, physical attractiveness, and wealth). Barring extreme behavior, actions and words spoken/performed by socially dominant people will always be better received than those same words and actions when spoken performed by a less socially dominant person.

Still not convinced? Let’s flip the table here. A woman sits down next to you at a bar, flashes a friendly smile, and then asks you a clever question. How do you react? How do you react if she’s a 9/10? How do you react if she’s overweight, unkempt, and wearing a baggy ‘World’s Best Mom’ t-shirt?

So, what’s the moral of the story here? Fuck pick up lines, fuck gimmicks, fuck routines, and fuck looking for shortcuts and easy ways out. The only way to consistently be more attractive to women, impressive to men, and to command more respect from everyone is to improve yourself. Hit the gym, learn and perfect useful skills, succeed/win at things, and make as much wealth as possible. Everything else socially will fall right in line.