Summary: lesson 4

The ignoring of agency and self awareness is a trend getting worse in trp. Instead of experimenting and getting out there, testing on new people, taking risks, learning personally, people are using this sub as just another crutch. They're missing the point, you have to get out there and be uncomfortable.


1) "how do I meet people", translation (do the thinking for me)

You meet people by doing just that, going to fucking meet people. It is the modern digital age, Google local free events and get moving. Use meet up. You are responsible for not meeting people. Don't come here begging for false confirmation by planning, mining, complaining, just fucking go out. Every day. Get turned down a hundred, a thousand, ten thousand times. Build up thick skin. If you've done that and are still having issues, post an fr and ask for help. Don't show up with nothing in hand. Have you been doing what you're afraid of for at least 3 months? No? Then we can't help you because you're too afraid to take control.

2) " should I next her for x", translation, (I don't know my boundaries)

be it a text message, missing a date for any (incorporeal) reason, demanding a relationship, or excessive lmr. Stop over thinking this. You should already know your goals, your boundaries. It's a simple answer every time, am I expending and not getting something in return? Yes? Cut it out. Follow the rule, if you've expended and haven't gained, you ignore or walk until you do. No substitutions extensions or refunds. You are responsible for your hard line and boundaries of what is acceptable, and what is not. No amount of trp advice over a text, random comment, or perceived slight is going to help you because we don't have all the details. If you don't know yourself well enough to define what is and isn't acceptable to you, go read the sidebar or check my other lessons, know yourself and be willing to say no.

3) "that's so beta" comments, translation (I have nothing to add, but I'm better than you, insert self masturbatory aid here )

Don't care. If that's beta, you can call them out, but only with a suggestion, contribution, or evidence. Chances are they're acutely aware that they're beta, that's why they're here. Simply negging a post doesn't contribute anything to anyone. If you really think you're so much better show them why or how. Otherwise you're just as much of a bitch, possibly more, waving your metaphysical masturbatory internet penis on an online forum for the joy of seeing yourself speak. Fuck you. This sub used to be about hard theory and applying the praxeology. Thanks to the new post rules, it's moving in a great direction. You're encouraging and participating in shit posts that alienate instead of educate. Go away or get better. Bottom line, you are the agent of change. At least the submission is attempting to change, you're staying exactly the same.

4) AWALT. This is a long one, translation (I'm shocked things are imperfect)

Of course I need to mention this, though hopefully this post will help change that. This number one rule is an excellent one, because it embodies a truth you must accept beyond simply women. All THINGS are like this. People, items, women, men, yourself, they break, they are imperfect, they do fail without exception. It is inevitable. You must accept that eventually everything ends.

Once you've accepted this it's much easier to maintain contentment, and even easier to recognize actual success and enjoyment. I like to refer to a quote, "the glass is always broken", because it signifies that even in something as simple as a glass you use, that glass will break. If you haven't accepted this, you become annoyed, frustrated, distracted, when it does. If you haven't accepted it you rarely enjoy it to it's full extent while you have it. If you haven't accepted this you don't even have a backup plan. Guess you're drinking that protein shake from a bowl today, too bad so sad.

It's the flip side of not realizing what you've got until it's gone. Presume it's gone in the first place and save yourself a lot of pain.

Women breaking, men breaking, sickness, your death, your injury, your loss of career, they are all inevitable. You will fail. Every single thing you do or interact with will break. I'm not being theoretical here, it's simply the case.

And that's great.

You do not have to live in fear of it, just recognize that interacting with the real world necessitates damage. Loss is guaranteed. Now you can fully appreciate the possibilities that can be exercised while the world's available in its facets. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ACCEPTING REALITY. What you do with that information is your business, but simply ignoring it is silly, destructive, and actively gives up your agency.

5) Impotent rage, translation (I'm angry at something, but don't realize that something is me.)

You are always angry at yourself. Maybe your lack of power, your lack of status, your lack of motivation, your lack of perseverance, your bad decision making, your lack of experience, your incorrect expectations, your inability to see signs, but it is always a measurement on YOU. You have the ability to redirect your energy. If you are ever angry, it is simply proof of your failure in some way. That's why anger hurts, and is also cathartic. Any externally focused anger is an illusion, you're letting yourself be controlled by an external world, take back your agency!

Simply put, you can't stop anger, but you can take responsibility and focus that anger towards addressing the root of the cause. Yourself, your preparations, your failure, your effort.

6) Height. Nationality. Etc. Things you "can't control". Translation (it's not my fault and the world is hard)

Cut that shit out. I guarentee there's someone with your own shortcoming, who isn't a star but a guy in the club a few blocks down, who is absolutely SLAYING in comparison to you. You know what the difference is? The thirty minutes (I'm being generous here) that you're spending doing this whimpering on reddit could be  practice instead. I'm not talking out of my ass here. As a Dominican, in America, short (5'9 until halfway through college, late growth spurt to 5'11) I had absolutely zero issues. You fail a thousand times first, then you're entitled to bitch, hint, you won't, because you'll have learned so much in those failures you'll already have everything you need. Remember, every moment you're complaining and theorizing about your unfair circumstance, someone out there like you is training to overcome them. And beating you.

lessons learned:

1) Take responsibility for everything you do.

2) Excel in your agency.

3) Don't neg, it confirms your own weakness.

4) Every day you waste complaining, someone just like you is out there practicing to overcome it, and will win when you meet them.

That's lesson 4, as always I'll be around for commentary.

Why you need a yearly monk-done

Vetting different levels of women.-done

Value, you have it, you likely don't understand it, let's discuss it, (updated)-done

Agency, you have it, stop ignoring it! - done

Silent or vibrate only, making it easy to be busy- upcoming

Goal building and follow through (updated)+upcoming

New addition: frame, from a philosophy major and practicing stoic-done