Can you be too emotionally distant and closed off?

BellatorCordis · 2013-06-14T21:06:03+00:00

Are you happy? If yes, why change?

thebears1986 · 2013-06-14T21:07:45+00:00

Push/pull is the key here. Sometimes you are aloof, sometimes you are open. How you are aloof and open matters. Difficult to master, and I will say that every girl you are dealing with has different things she wants push/pull on, how much, how often, etc. Red pill and PUA blogs have described this pretty well and much better than I could. A search on some of them should turn up something.

VZPurp · 2013-06-15T01:52:38+00:00

No girl has actually ever held it against me for being too emotionally distant and closed off. The worst response I've gotten was:

"You're a tough nut to crack."

That's it. Then I just laugh and meet up with them and have a good time. Stop caring so much, and if the girl is difficult, move to the next one; or, as I prefer, interact with multiple girls regularly and let them join/drop as time goes on.

Life is pretty wonderful, but it's also short.

TDCRedPill · 2013-06-14T21:11:30+00:00

My viewpoint has recently been that guys start out trying to be fully open and 'in touch with our feelings' and show both vulnerability and (negative) emotions. Show of weakness plus vulnerability and sexual interest drops to 0.

When they learn to curb that, they then get closed off near what I picture you are doing. Facts are free flowing, but without showing or generating any emotion so they aren't showing vulnerability. No vulnerability to expose, but they don't generate the good feelings of positive emotions. Better than before but not great.

I think the goal is to be able to give out the nuggets of facts with stories to go with them that show my positive emotions. No negative emotions, and not showing vulnerability.

Showing emotions and putting them out there is needed to connect with folks, of both sexes. They key is to not show or describe negative emotions (makes you much easier to want to be around) in your many positive stories (makes you interesting), and not show vulnerability (for sexual attraction).

evatt49 · 2013-06-15T04:13:04+00:00

I think that maybe you're thinking about your game a little too constantly. The reason you say you aren't super conversational is because you're afraid it will kill attraction. This is going a little too far. You don't have to constantly be weighing every move; if you want to talk about random shit and offer up personal opinions then do so. But again if you're just naturally quiet, don't change, you sound like you're doing fine.

pialox · 2013-06-15T12:50:57+00:00

I get this comment about myself a lot. I am the opposite in regards to voicing my opinion but still don't get into intricacies. I think sometimes you need to remember that women are much more influenced by their environment and other people. To me you are doing it right as long as you are in control of your own emotions & don't show that you are easily influenced or manipulated by others emotional state. Just don't forget to have fun. If you do display a distant like nature ensure that when you do display emotion it isn't always negative.

Perhaps what your friends of the opposite sex are saying is that you aren't passionate about anything? Showing a passion for something will automatically bring people in and not revel any chinks in your emotional armour so to speak.

[deleted] · 2013-06-15T14:47:47+00:00

https://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2012/08/01/being-an-emotional-man-does-not-equal-talking-about-your-feelings/

VeryWideDoucheNozzle · 2013-06-14T23:23:01+00:00

Title	Can you be too emotionally distant and closed off?
Author	BellatorCordis
Upvotes	8
Comments	14
Date	June 14, 2013 8:58 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	/r/TheRedPill
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/can-you-be-too-emotionally-distant-and-closed-off.4879 https://theredarchive.com/post/4879
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1gd2by/can_you_be_too_emotionally_distant_and_closed_off/