Intro: Started from absolutely ground zero in terms of status, appearance, and social skills. A few notes on what I found most effective in early development and ultimate mastery.

Body:

There are enough posts about how a red piller woke up one day and decided a change was needed. I'm not posting to self inflate my worth - but do know that like some of you, I began entry into this arena at a major disadvantage to virtually everyone around me. Overweight, socially inept, no social circles outside of video games, etc. It wasn't pretty. I'm posting this to give insight into a few ways you can accelerate your self development and achieve results.

Early Stages of Development

No Shame: One thing that helped me immensely was having no shame. I don't mean that I deliberately did heinous things for their own sake of being outrageous, but I treated everything like an experiment. I completely turned off my internal sensor of caring what other people thought of what I said or did. I talked to girls I had no business talking to (this was high school mostly, so the pecking order did matter in terms of status). I didn't hesitate to jokingly insult people. Inserted myself places I wasn't supposed to be - new lunch tables, different seating arrangements in classrooms without assigned seating, started going to places like the smoking corner after school even though I didn't smoke. And found ways to be invited to large social functions (parties, bonfires, etc.) that could lead to more interactions.

Personality Tinkering: I gave my brain an overload of information on all aspects of the social spectrum. I also embarrassed myself more than most people could probably tolerate. My awareness of how I was being received helped to really see what worked and what didn't. My dry sense of humor was something my friends appreciated about me, but tailoring to a larger audience of diverse people was something that took time. Being an intellectual and finding outlets for that was difficult but I managed.

New Social Circle: Finding new friends who had success in areas I desired success in was monumental in my development. This was years before I knew about TRP and so I sought out guys with success in the dating arena. Just as I overloaded my mind with personal experiences and no shame, I peppered them with questions and sought their advice on a wide range of subjects. People like to feel wanted or needed, and so, even if I may have been a social liability at the time, we developed tight knit friendships. Those friendships last to this day almost 10 years later.

Overall Health: I used to watch the clock tick down the minutes before lunch. I would get the most unhealthy food available every single day. As soon as I had a purpose to my day, this behavior disappeared immediately. When you stop eating for enjoyment and start eating for results, it not longer feels like a burden or a chore. You end up excited to weigh yourself the next day and see if you can get to the next size down with your clothing. I didn't do much research on how to eat properly, but I cut out ice cream, sugary drinks, greasy food, and replaced with less damaging items. I also started to lift and run - no excuses, 5 days minimum per week. Results didn't come overnight but after 12-15 months I had a six pack, was able to run 7+ miles, and could lift roughly double what I had started at.

Later Stages of Development

This is where TRP does best in educating its reader base and I don't have a lot to add to the pile. But there is one area I think that should be addressed: Your Persona.

Who do you think has a better chance of getting the attention of a girl in the bar? The guy dancing like an idiot in the middle of the floor, clearly enjoying himself and not caring about everyone around him, or the one standing by the wall watching him? Whether or not the dancer is successful is irrelevant - he will get the girl's attention every time. His technique and game will determine his success rate, but in terms of standing out, he's going to be the one that does.

I got access to some powerful advice early. The louder your external personality (the more you're dancing like an idiot at the bar), the better chance you have of getting the attention you want. This isn't a pass to be a douche bag or audibly louder than other people when you talk - just having a serious presence whenever you're interacting with people. If anything, girls are more forgiving of loud external personalities than they are of quiet ones. It at least puts you at play for her attention. Less effort is needed to indicate your interest in her. As I've seen at many music festivals, if you lose yourself in the music and are going hard, women will even approach you to try to participate in you having a good time. It is a rarity that being 'loud' has led me to results worse than if I acted what made me most comfortable.

Just as important as a loud external personality is the need for a reflective, intellectual, alternate personality for when you are alone with her. It will throw her off guard, but more importantly, make you seem like the most interesting person she's ever met. She will think that only she is getting to see this side of you and that will mean a lot to her. I'm not saying to fundamentally change who you are - if anything, your personal time with her is when you should be most like yourself and comfortable in your skin. But if it deviates from your external personality it will make you that much more interesting.

When combining a loud external personality and a deeply interesting personal one, you will find really excellent results in all areas.

An Example: Perhaps on the extreme end of the application of this principle is with a girl I met at the beginning of college. I was walking through the halls and introducing myself to every attractive coed in my building. She was in a corner lounge when I walked through. She made some small joke about the shirt I was wearing and I escalated fiercely, insulting something about her. I didn't pause in my walking - just walked right through the lounge. It was insulting enough that she was very taken aback and looked at her friend in shock. I definitely made more of an impression on her than some wimpy guy who would apologize for their attire.

Roll forward to later that day, I had my door open and was playing loud music. I wanted anyone in the vicinity to come join me in my dorm room. We had 6-8 people hanging out and getting to know each other. She came in and saw me in the corner. Very clearly intrigued at this point. Avoids me for 10 minutes before coming over. I immediately show my real personality to her and it was like a switch went off. Nobody else existed in the room at that point. While it took years of preparation of exercise, diet, no shame, new social circles, and experimenting, it took less than 5 minutes and she was hooked.

Lessons Learned:

  • Try experimenting with 'no shame' if you are in early stages of development and are seeking success

  • Always be on high alert with your awareness to continually hone your personality

  • Reach out to new social circles to seek out successful people in areas you desire results in

  • Try out my recommendation of being different between public and private persona - I'm not sure how this will be received but it has worked incredibly well for my friend and I

  • Take care of your health, not just your appearance - educate yourself on eating, lift, run, and go through your day with a purpose