I'm in a LTR of one year, and six months. But half of the beginning of the LTR, I was a pussy and it was pretty shit. I was indenial, depressed, highly stressed, paranoid, and had extreme anxiety. I tried to put forth boundaries, but she'd go behind my back and break my rules, by texting other guys. I tried breaking up and getting back together, seeing if she fixed her act, she did not.
Id spy, and think about what's she's doing constantly, also I'd constantly text. Sad And funny, I know Lmao.
To actually shift the power role, you must detach yourself, from her, and your feelings. You must build self respect for yourself, that's a must.
Must be comfortable being alone, and adopt the mindstate of, Nothing last forever, things end.
Practice being alone and bettering yourself and you'll learn to slowly move on, stop doing little pussy habits, like texting fast and texting alot.
She'll notice eventually, it might take awhile, it might not, have some rough angry sex, then show attention for only a short amount of time, maybe an hour. Then go about your night or day, focus on yourself. Don't talk much, don't express anger or anything.
After awhile of this, talk to her, say what you want.
Example From me: I'm tired of this *Name, I'm done with these boundaries being broken, you're not the type of women I want to settle with, I want a women that respects my boundaries, I will not accept this behavior.
Say it ONCE, if you said it before, make it clear this is the last time your talking about this.
She tried interrupting me, I simply said, I'm not done, and continued talking.
After I was done, I did not let her speak, I didn't want to hear it, I went about my day and remained "happy."
Nothing last forever, things end. Remember that and it'll help with your frame.
I texted others openly and talked to others a bit more often (Not alot), she blew up and was pissed off. I told her, "talk to who u want", I don't care anymore. I really didn't care anymore, and I think she knew that.
She even tried saying, "but I want u to care" I simply said I don't.
I was getting to know another female who I have on the back burner, my LTR said why am I like this, I simply said, u don't respect my boundaries. She was angry and all.
She said stop and please, all that. I said aggressively, you're going to respect my boundaries or not? Because I'm done, I'm not going to be with a women that don't respect, when I can get another real quick.
She was sad and said yes.
I still kept some distance. Checked her phone at random times eventually, maybe a month after that; I was going to drop her if she texted one more person, she did not. I did this randomly and I was surprised of her behavior and actions. Shit got better, good for her.
At that point, I meant everything I said. So you must reach that point, you cannot fake it.
Haven't had another issue since then, this worked in my LTR. U must detach yourself from your LTR, gain confidence, don't give a fuck, by knowing things don't last forever.
U must also know what ticks off your women, and what turns her on, (talking aggressive, out of nowhere,turns mines on) calmly talk and hold frame, but by no means, talk like a pussy or stumble over your words.
U cannot save your LTR all by yourself, she must contribute as well, it's hard emotionally for the weak, but really easy for those who can control their emotion and are emotionally strong in this aspect of life.
Don't put much work in a LTR, unless she's putting in work as well. She'll know when your distancing away and/or on the search for someone better.
Don't get upset if it doesn't work, once you man up, you'll be happy you didn't settle with a person that disrespected you.
Focus on money, hobbies, and things that make you happy. You must learn to get strong for this to work, it was very hard for my former weak self.
Trust me, she'll get 100x better once you become a man and have self respect. If not, man up and leave her. Don't forgive cheating by the way, that's a no no LMAO. Obviously.
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