Hard Road Ahead: The Burden of Performance

Hard Road Ahead: The Burden of Performance

“Women are Human Beings; Men are Human Doings.”

-Dr. Warren Farrell

“Men are here to DO shit. Women are here to make more men.” – Based Napoleon, only he said it in French. (Quote approximate.)

“I’ll figure something out.”

-Men, Everywhere.

Men Have Plans; Women Plan on Men Having a Plan.

So I know a woman socially, who remarked to me (and others present) once at a cocktail party, that she enjoyed asking men what their plan was for a “Zombie Apocalypse”. “They all have one,” she said, “And they love telling you about it.”

Everyone had a good chuckle, and then I said, “You live in a state with natural disasters, right? Earthquakes, wildfires, mudslides, that sort of thing?”

Her: “Yes.”

Me: “And I bet you expect your husband to ‘have a plan’, for you and the kids, if something like that happens where you live, right?”

Her: “Yes, of course.”

Me: “That plan is going to be a lot like his ‘Zombie Apocalypse’ Plan only with less shooting the shuffling dead in the head.”

She became a bit more thoughtful after that.

Women’s Value Is Intrinsic; Men’s Value Is Extrinsic

Men DO; Women ARE. What is a woman expected to do? Be a CEO? BAHAHAHAHAHA! Maybe she CAN be, but what if she fails? Well, just don’t do stupid, illegal shit and go to jail, like Elizabeth Holmes is going to. Lizzie just preemptively had a kid because she’s going to be spending the majority of the rest of her kid-having years in prison. She also dropped the Steve Jobs impersonation and the frog-like voice and talks more like a breathless young girl now.

Ah, that’s it. Women have kids. Or don’t. They are hot, or they are not. And if they are hot enough they can simply bail on their own life and set up shop in someone else’s. It’s no mistake that attractive women often marry rich men. And then what? Squeeze out a couple of kids, maybe do some light housekeeping and cooking? Good for her.

I listened to an interview with one of the authors of a book titled ‘Smart Girls Marry Money’ or similar. She is, IIRC, some sort of high-achieving double-ivy league grad. She told of visiting her hometown and meeting up with their girlfriends, who are basically the “Real Housewives of Podunk”. She expected them to be all impressed with her, and maybe they were, but they had all married men who could provide and so she related how they had lunch, with wine, and got hot stone massages and such, and she wound up thinking, “Wait, I’m supposed to be the ‘smart one’. These women have fun lives!”

And if you are a man? You had better have an education or a trade or learn how to be an entrepreneur or something, because your good looks aren’t going to bring the cashola in. Men need to show up, get on their grind, say on their grind and make themselves INTO something. That’s why we teach you about self-improvement.

Think about the last time you were on a team of guys. Maybe a work team, maybe you were in the military, maybe you were on a sport team. What matters? Everything – race, age, whatever - drops out pretty quickly and it becomes about who brings what talent that they can contribute to the team. Men, with regard to other men, don’t care about who they are, they care about skill and character. They care if the other guys on the team can do their job, and if they can be counted, even under pressure. This is why men razz each other, particularly younger guys. To see how they handle adversity.

Years ago, I would play basketball on a city court. There was a thing where black guys (and it was mostly black guys) wouldn’t bother to guard the white guys until you showed you could play. I saw this and positioned myself near the hoop, on the baseline, calling for the ball with my right hand, away from the traffic in the key. Our point guard lobbed me the ball but it sailed waaaay over my head, and out of bounds. As I turned to jog up court he hit his chest and said, “Yo’, my bad.” I replied, “What are you doing? Shaving points?” He laughed as did some other guys. He had accepted responsibility, and I had let him off the hook. I had never met the guy before that day, but that’s the moment we became teammates.

“I’ll figure something out.”

“I’ll figure something out.” You’ve heard men say this – you may even have said it yourself – after a setback. You may not have any idea what you are going to do, just that you will “figure something out.” This statement is the first step in fighting back against adversity – and other men will recognize this and respect it. It is the first step of every comeback story.

You need to learn to face adversity, and be resilient. If you get knocked down 7 times, you’d better get back up 8 times. If you fail, nobody is going to feel sorry for you. Society does not have empathy for men. Succeed, and you can be a hero. Fail, and you didn’t have the “Right Stuff.” Fire is the test of steel, and adversity is the test of strong men. The man on top of the mountain didn’t FALL there. Yours is the Hard Road, the Difficult Road. It will seem that all the world is against you. But hard roads often lead to beautiful places. (Hat Tip: Zig Ziglar).

Don’t worry, younglings, you will get used to it. And you will come to savor it. I would much rather rely on myself than someone else. I know me; they could be a fucking loser. I’d rather bet on me.

The Future Is(n’t) Female.

No disrespect to the ladies here, but when Hillary Clinton announced, through that grinning rictus of a mouth, that “The Future is Female” I laughed out loud. So long as the Burden of Performance is male, the future is male also. Wherever there is a dirty, dangerous job to be done, there is a man doing it.

The ¡Feministas!, in using that language, have said the quiet part out loud. To the ¡Feministas!, Feminism isn’t F=M, it’s meant to be F>M. They don’t understand power, other than in male terms. (Hat Tip: /u/Whisper) They don’t know how to create it. Thus they tell us that “Men! You have to give up some of your power, so we can be equal!” If we were really “equal” shouldn’t they know how to make their own power? Of course, but they don’t. So instead, they tell us “We are Strong and Independent! Now, men! Solve all of our problems!”

The Patriarchy exists and will continue to exist, and its biggest allies will be feminine women. Why? Nobody loves themselves some Patriarchy as much as attractive feminine women. Because women benefit from the Patriarchy more than anyone. Why? Because the Sun of the Patriarchy shines on all. In male hierarchies, everyone, high and low, has a place. In female hierarchies, not so: the weapon of choice in female hierarchies is exclusion and ostracism. In terms borrowed from H.G. Wells, they are the Eloi, and we are the Morlocks.

Takeaways:

-Take responsibility for yourself.

-Adversity will shape you and make you stronger, or it will break you.

-Building your own strength is the path to self-reliance.

-That man on top of the mountain? He didn’t fucking FALL there.

Further Reading:

Life After 30: How to Be an Old Guy

-You have one life. Here's how to enjoy it.

She Wants You To be Better Than She Is

-Women want Winners.

Become the Prize

-Master your life. Become the Prize.

You Never Stop Competing

-Life is About the Struggle. Here's What You Need to Know to Win.

Uncle Vasya’s Guide to Outcome Independence or Welcome to Level 99 DGAF

-How to Rock Out With Your Cock Out.

You Are Going to Fail. Learn From It And Become Who You Want To Be

-You can fail just as easily at something you hate as at something you love.

You Need To Harden The Fuck Up

-Hard Men Have Good Times.