Thinking back.
I think back on countless times where I have tried to help people and for the life of me I cannot think of a time where the outcome was what I wanted. Every time I have helped people and tried to share my prosperity it has always been rewarded with jealousy , backstabbing and at a minimum just being taken advantage of, without the initial goal of actually trying to teach someone, or help them out of a bad situation being accomplished. The worst part is all that diverted energy could have been spent on my own endeavors. I have employed people at my construction company, found people high paying easy jobs, helped men get custody of their children and helped people struggling with addiction and worst of all lent my brother tens of thousands of dollars that I will never see again.
The reason that these endeavors are a waste of time and resources.
They didn’t ask for help. I saw that they were struggling and I knew I had the solution to help them, with their relationship, get a better job, get educated, pay their rent, or a plethora of other situations that helpless people find themselves in. The problem lies in the attitude towards the solution. The person has no skin in the game, if you offer to help them out of nowhere they often think you have some ulterior motive or that you are using them in some way. The path to success becomes muddied and harder to trek for both parties, especially when the giver feels taken advantage of because the person being helped is not thankful, or even resentful of the help because of false pride or other reasons.
The solution.
The solution is to focus solely on yourself and what helps you; at most reach out to your extended nuclear family. I consider this to be my nuclear family and close friends. The catch is to only offer help when it is asked for. There are some men that will never ask for help, if they are your close friend I would personally help them, a lot is learnt through struggle though, so you might be stripping them of the opportunity to learn from the hardship. People know that you know the answer to their problem, or that you can pick up really heavy shit that they can’t, or that you have money to lend because your not credit rich and can read a fucking book on how to invest money. The key is make them ask you and that there be an understanding that just because they ask, doesn’t mean you do it, just like children, people need to be told no or they will think that you are at their service. After all you have your own path to trek and any help diverted to their needs takes away from your own journey, it's hard enough to carry our own water.
Why to help those around you.
The reason we help people is because we have the plan, we know how to make money, create and increase our resource pool and generally build the people around us just by setting the correct example, but under no circumstances do I think that people who are undeserving should be rewarded with that knowledge or our time to help them out of self imposed situations that they are in. I mean if I found myself trudging through a shit life, I would do whatever it took to find prosperity and everything that comes with it, source: I have.
Those closest to us deserve our attention if we want to have a thriving community and actually enjoy the network of people around us. But they need to ask for help, because they understand that you know the way, and when they become successful because of your help they need to bring more to the communal table then they did before so that the time and money that you have invested in them can be returned with the multiplier effect so that you can enjoy the resources that you originally invested in them and ultimately share in their successes.
These are some of my thoughts on building the network around us and weeding the mooches and losers out of it, it's been on my mind a lot as I have been working from home a lot and am really looking forward to building up my community and the new adventures I have planned for 2021. I really do not see exceptions to this, i would expect children, spouses and family members to all contribute as much as they can to the collective and any freeloaders or mooches should be kicked to the curb as fast as possible, or in the case of nuclear family, taught how to act correctly, which is your job as a leader anyway.
I don't mean, do not be a good person, that means something different to everyone, just know that every minute spent on someone else is a minute you will never get back. The vast majority of your time should be invested in you and what you find to be important.
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