Mainly lurking for over a year now. My journey to TRP was like many others; a couple serious relationships turned to bad breakups, leading to bitterness and resentment. Then began the search for answers re: where I fucked up and voila, I found this majestic fucking place. Since I've found this place, I've been doing everything to increase my SMV, from reading for knowledge, dressing better, getting a trainer, always hitting up the barber, paying attention to finances and starting a business etc. Better yet, I'm doing it for me. So first and foremost, thank you to the whole RP community. I'm glad I swallowed the pill and have this wealth of knowledge at my fingertips. Thank you for providing the online ass kicking necessary in order to get us to unplug. TRP doesnt lead to a particular destination. It's a journey.
Today: I am currently in an LTR; dating 10 months, exclusive for 6. Good vetting process. She isn't the reason for my happiness, but she doesn't take away from it and only adds to it. Balls empty every time, stomach full. She's interesting and I enjoy her company. This past weekend was the first major event in my life since being with her.
My pops had a major heart attack. Doc said if I didn't make the call, he'd be dead. Luckily I caught it in time. Kept it together for the fam, and didnt tell the LTR until later in the day after she finished work (dont live together). Simply told her what happened and that everything is undet control now. As a background, she's only met him once and hung out with my sister and her husband twice.
She called me and seemed sympathetic, but didn't know what exactly to say. A lot of "what happened...ahhh...ughhh...thats shitty...how do you feel". I said good, glad I made the right decision and everything is stable. But, I guess I expected more from the interaction. My best friend went balistic when he heard and rushed over to the hospotal from across town. She sent a couple nice texts about "I'm here if you need to talk. I love you. Your parents are in my thoughts" etc. I expected her to either ask if she can come by (she was at home) or simply say "where are you? I'll be there". Not because I need her there. Not because I want her there. But because I want HER TO WANT TO BE THERE.
My question for the community is: how has your SO been there for you during rough times? Is this something you teach (within reason), or something you simply expect? Is “expecting” things and withdrawing when you don’t get it a form of covert contract? Does it conflict with OI? And if it is something to teach or make them aware of, how do you approach it without coming off needy or seeming BP? What do you do if your SO doesn’t meet these expectations? I want to hear about your experiences and how your SO supported you (because sometimes we want more than a cook and cock vacuum) and how you handled it when they failed to do so.