We go on and on about how crippling and expensive divorce [rape] can be, and use that as one (of many) bases to encourage men to never get married. So focused are we on divorce and infidelity and the general culture of entitlement among today’s generation of special snowflake women that we often don’t discuss the most obvious disadvantage of marriage:
Marriage is expensive.
Even if you never, ever get divorced, and hell, even if you don’t have kids, unless your wife is a big earner, marriage is expensive. If you do have kids, it’s even moreso, not just because you’re feeding and clothing children, but because somebody, whether it’s you or your wife, needs to take a step back from work to be there to get the kids to and from school, and to take a day off every time a kid is sick. Good luck being a high powered executive when you come late, leave early, and are out 4-6 days a month doing kid shit. So kids don’t just cost you money on the back end. They hurt your income, too. But even without kids in the picture (I can't imagine why anyone would get married without intending to have children), marriage is expensive.
When you make 100,000$, and your wife doesn’t work, or if she does, makes less than half of what you do (which is most cases, so for this post, we can disregard the rare cases of very highly paid women and talk about them some other time), picture the scenario: You have a combined income of 100-150k. Your wife wants to buy a house in a nice neighborhood, furnish that house, have cable TV, nice cell phones, go out to eat once a week, go out for drinks with the girls once a month, and when you finally come up for air to do the math, you realize that you’re supporting your wife. Even if she works. She’s living in a house she couldn’t afford on her salary, eating well, and enjoying a high quality of life. If you were to take half the mortgage, half the utilities, and so on for all of your expenses each month, to figure out “her share” of your costs, that’s all of her paycheck, AND some of yours. Not to mention that she goes out and buys clothes once a month with your money, pays a personal trainer yet never seems to get in shape, joins a bunch of clubs she never attends, and other stupid shit many wives do with money. You’re supporting her. And if she doesn’t work at all, that’s even more the case.
Just being married is expensive. When you really think about how much money you spend keeping a wife around, you could buy yourself a new car every year. You don’t need a new car every year, so you could probably buy one every other year, and in the off-years, take a vacation to Japan or Italy or something. Or if you like nice cars, you could buy a nice one. How many BMWs do you think an average husband spends on his wife over the course of their marriage?
Which leads us to the question of the day: How many BMWs is a wife worth? Does she bring something to the table that is more valuable than all of the new cars, vacations, and other things you could have done with your money? (Or heck, you could just save/invest all of that money over the course of the time you would have been married, and retire early. You could become financially independent. You’re giving this up if you get married. If you get married, you’ll work like a dog until the day you die to support someone else.)
What does a wife do or provide that makes the extreme cost of marriage worthwhile? Sex? Many wives don’t or barely sex their husbands. And laugh/brag about it to their friends. And even if you consider the few wives that are crazy in bed and fuck their men silly – what’s a good whore cost? Is sex, alone, worth that expenditure? Maybe a wife cleans the house and takes care of the kids. Do maids and nannies make BMW money? No. They’re shit jobs with shit pay. But you’re “paying” your wife BMW money to do that cheap labor. And that’s assuming your wife actually does that stuff and doesn’t make you spend yet more of your money hiring an actual maid because her life’s too hard to clean the house.
Is access to her womb and bearing your children worth that kind of money? What’s an egg donor/surrogate cost? They’re not cheap, but that’s a one-time payment, not a lifelong financial commitment.
And beyond the straight-up financial cost, when you get married, you’re at a constant risk of divorce. And you lose a huge degree of freedom. You’re accountable to your family. You can’t just come and go as you please, do whatever you feel like, spend money on whatever you feel like. While the degree to which you have to restrict your behaviors can vary significantly, and some guys manage to pull off a marriage with relatively few limitations on their lives, you still have to make some changes. You have to do some work to maintain the marriage, or you end up divorce-raped.
Is there anything a woman could bring to the table that makes the cost of marriage worthwhile? Is there anything a wife does or provides to you that you couldn’t obtain, on your own, at less of a cost?
Only one thing. The “status” of being married. You’re supposed to consider yourself lucky if you’ve found a woman willing to let you be her husband. How much would you pay for that?