~ archived since 2018 ~

Most guys have no idea what they are doing.

February 18, 2021

If you haven't heard about them, we are currently having a lost boy epidemic. Lost boys is a term coined by illimitable Man to describe a lost generation (more like 3) of men who have been without strong male guidance or societal need dealing with the aimlessness in different ways. To illustrate:

Your grandfather likely worked on a farm, as did his dad, almost everyone did. They were conscripted to war and those who returned had women who needed them to provide food water and shelter. They were too busy not starving to death to ponder their 'masculinity' but they had purpose. Your father likely had a manufacturing job. He may or may not have gone to war, but he worked his whole life, and so long as he cashed out before the 1980s he had a pension. He enjoyed a post war prosperity that was unheard of. He saw the merging of the sexual, industrial, and information revolutions.
You didn't sign up for a war as there wasn't one. You didn't have a rite of passage because you're not a fucking paleolithic hunter who the tribe needed to keep from starving to death. You are raised in a world of abundance and no one needs you for anything. You mistakenly think that sucks, when in reality every man who came before you worked his ass off so you wouldn't have to. you spend all day trying to find purpose, meaning, or something to look up to like a dad 2.0.

The point is things are moving fast now. Your dad or grandfather have no idea what life is like for a man now, so they are no help. They have no idea what you're doing. None of your friends know, none of your brothers or sisters know, it's entirely new ground here. Roissy himself said that Voltaire would be sad to see seduction reduced to a list of clinical ideas and concepts, removing all the magic out of fucking, but hey, it works. This is uncharted territory, and the one thing you need to remember

No one has a fucking clue what to do, and anyone who says otherwise is selling you something or demanding you reassure them they are doing it right

The best advice in here for guys who don't know whats good or bad advice is to 'try it yourself' and thats a generally good idea. It's one thing to try acting aloof or not returning a girls calls who keeps wasting your time without fucking you. It's a whole other thing to completely reimagine your life based on some asshole online shouting "Be like me, it's working for me! So Far!" It's everywhere:


I want to quote Whisper on this, but can't be sure. This place was never meant to tell you 'what to think' it was meant to show you 'how to think' and one of the first things worth thinking is:

Is this guy full of shit, clueless, naive or what?

And the answer, 90% of the time is, yes. Yes he is. In the same way a brand new wife could never imagine not loving her new husband to death, a jaded ten year wife leaves her husband because 'he's boring, I'm not haaapy anymore and he was emotionally abusive.' The point the people who are old enough to have experience lived in a different time, and the people who aren't don't have any idea if they just made a life changing fuckup, and they won't for years.

Now, it's possible that whoever is telling you what you NEED to do with your life is the best thing ever, but it's likely it isn't. If it was as good as they say they wouldn't be pushing so hard for you to join them like an Amway salesman having tupperwear parties. I've not been around that long and I think about everyone calling me a fucking moron because I balked at the idea of buying a house in 2006 e.g. It's not that they wanted everyone around them to lose money, they just didn't know any better, but they felt reassured they did when everyone else was doing it too.

So, like just about anyone alive, you have no idea what the 'right choice' is, and thats OK. Trust in your abilities. Game is one part of that. The ability to walk up to a girl, look good, be charming, and fuck her well enough that she texts you 'you awake?' at 11PM a few times a week is something that will help you. Not just in scratching that itch, but that same charm will really help if you're interviewing for a job, giving a pitch to a potential client, telling that officer who pulled you over that you don't know how fast you were going etc.

Whatever happens, the more tools you have the sharper your skills, and the better you are able to separate shit from Shinola, the better you'll be able to adapt to whatever 2021, 2022 or whatever brings. And no one knows, seriously. Do you think anyone knew in 2019 that you'd have to deal with this shit? Don't sweat the details, make yourself into the man you would entrust with your life, and he will make the decisions that have to be made in your own self interests. After all, that guy wipes your ass everyday for free when no one else would dream of doing it.

And if you have a specific problem that a tnageable goal you are having trouble with, one of the best solutions is to bring it up in front of a few thousand dudes, because at least one guy has done it before and can probably show you what worked for him, or at least what didn't.

To summarize, for those who lack purpose, meaning, a roadmap, direction, leadership, or a mission, the answer is easy: The mission is you, the goals are the ones you make for yourself, and if they are wrong, you'll have learned from them and picked better ones the next time. Don't let anyone take those decisions from you, since they are the ones that will make or break you in life.

If you don't believe me, go find an old dude who let his wife call the shots, or the cop who relied on his union and government to protect his pension. or the realtionship coach who livestreamed his felony ask how they are holding up.

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the subreddit /r/TheRedPill.

/r/TheRedPill archive

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

Post Information
Title Most guys have no idea what they are doing.
Author RStonePT
Upvotes 259
Comments 63
Date February 18, 2021 9:07 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/TheRedPill
Archive Link
Original Link

[–]enkae7317 79 points80 points  (19 children) | Copy Link

I know of at LEAST 8 single mothers on my social media friends list raising SONs. That is an insane number. I thought it was just me but no, the number of single mothers raising sons has been going up in the past decade.

I personally know 4 single mothers raising sons. Their kids are undisciplined, and do whatever they want. They know ZERO consequences for their actions. You can tell they've never had anyone tell them to stop. They run around, tearing EVERYTHING up, leaving a horrendous mess, and the mother doesn't do jack squat. Some are being taught to "respect" women and by that, they are essentially bowing down to women in every way.

[–]Kodiak01 28 points29 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

On the other side of the coin, a good male friend of mine has been raising his daughter for over a decade. He raised her to be a sassy, take-no-bullshit, motorcycle-loving, respectful, highly intelligent, polite, hard working badass of a young woman. In 2017, she was actually the only minor at my wedding (her father was Best Man), and she acted like a complete grown-up.

Meanwhile his ex-wife dumped her 3 kids from her prior marriage on HER parents and bolted off to the Carolinas, giving up an RN job to become a Denny's waitress with her literally fall-over-drunk alcoholic new fling. Her kids included a girl that got an abortion in her mid teens after getting knocked up and that she would let have co-ed parties with no supervision and lots of vodka IN THEIR HOUSE, an autistic boy and another girl that faked hearing problems for attention.

That sums up the difference about as well as any situation.

One more thing about this male friend: Over the decades he taught me more about life, relationships, perseverance and how to be a MAN than my toxic family ever did. He was the Alpha Mentor I very badly needed at that point in my life.

[–]Zdeneksfilter 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd love to hear more about your buddy.

[–]enkae7317 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Notice I said, single moms with bad kids. In most of these situations, the father is not around.

Adding to your stance--I know single dads that raise their kids well. They raise them with strength and discipline. If they have daughters, they raise them to NOT be like the mom that abandoned them. If they have a son, they raise the son to be strong internally and out.

[–]JpowYellen3some 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What are some of the things he taught you?

[–]RedEyeBlackEye1 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Add to that the propensity of children to mimic adult behavior. So when mommy(and her hoe platoon) constantly fired off on whims with emotional outbursts, it makes junior think it's okay for HIM to emulate. Men are supposed to control emotions and use them to our advantage, not act like brats on a temper tantrum (aka female).

[–]Zdeneksfilter 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh wow. One of my good friends in a single mother raising a boy. She's actually pretty chill and good fun to be around but man oh man... I feel bad for that poor boy. He has no spine whatsoever. He's at that age where boys pick fights every other day (some times every day) and perhaps have to wear a black eye for awhile; but he's so soft that he'll break down and cry over his toy scraping against the floor and chipping off a little paint. His mother even got him a doll. I doubt he's ever been in a fight in his life, and I fear he won't be able to build those lasting boyhood friendships that almost always spawn from a bit of scuffling and roughhousing, before genuine respect and fondness is created. If I lived closer to them, I'd perhaps offer to take him to a ball game or stuff and maybe try and make an impression.

[–]digitallovexx 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

There are men that also do that to their children, I know women that are tough and men that are weak so....

[–]drbrockstar69 64 points65 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not only do guys not have a clue, but the number of guys you look at and assume they are destroying it are either suffering from social anxiety, suffering from oneitis, or just clueless. The real eye opener is seeing “high value” men have 0 common sense when it comes with women. The jacked doctor doesn’t know how to approach girls at a club, the D1 football player has been locked in a relationship for 3 years, the local DJ is a creep and scares girls away before he hooks up.

Never compare yourself to other guys. See what works with the interactions you have and replicate the positive ones.

[–]offtheshitproductive 13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

One of the things that give my life purpose, that isn't talked about much on TRP, helping out younger boys and teaching them. I'm 18, but my 12 year old cousin looks up to me like a brother, and I've taught him so much from going to the gym, to how to get girls. He's one happy and enjoyable little shit and I think part of that is because of me and it's very fulfilling.

[–]Zech4riah 27 points28 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Extremely current topic. There seems to be a fake guru selling snake oil in every corner of manosphere these days.

Whatever happens, the more tools you have the sharper your skills, and the better you are able to separate shit from Shinola

This is a sad truth. Actually it's sort of a irony of the universe. When you are able properly to separate shit from Shinola, you barely need help or guidance anymore because you are already living the life you always wanted and all that is left is the polishing of the diamond.

[–]RedKingRising 12 points13 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

They saw that roissy/roosh book money and was like oh snap. I can grift these losers. If you're buying shit from redpill gurus you're a cuck. Pirate their shit since they aren't making posts. fuck em.

[–]1BlondeHornyElf 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

only one i'd give money to is Roosh becuz he stuck his neck out much farther than a lot of the other guys.. Roosh might be nuts but i don't think he ever held back on any issue.

[–]1_do_not_read_this_ 54 points55 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I didn't have the kind of guidance you talk about, when I was growing up. My dad was a classic beta who very literally gave me -zero- advice on women and relationships.

It's taken me years and literal internet searches for "how to be a better man" before I found some answers that resonated with me and tuned me into my already existing internal skill set that I was unwilling to use in a BP world.

But to the point, yes, try what sounds reasonable and is within your own skill set or ability to pull off successfully. I'll ask a woman out three times before bailing. I know that "two" is the rule. Whatever, it's no loss to send one more text.

I read something the other day about being grim-faced and how that's mysterious. Whatever, I'm a fun guy, smiling is my default, and if you're wearing hockey gear we're going to talk about hockey. Point being, read the materials and internalize what resonates with who you are. Try the tips that are new to you.

Don't think there are hard and fast rules (some are, some aren't). I dropped a few tears when my main girl's 35 year old sister was sitting in an urn at the front of the church after overdosing. The rule is never cry in front of your woman. Whatever, a misty eye is nothing to be ashamed of. Just dont' blubber like a fucking girl. She teased me about it but it was appreciative teasing. We're still banging almost a year later.

I think things are only going to be tougher on the kids coming up. Women are men these days, men are turning into women, cancel culture for saying anything perceived as "toxic masculinity". Women have turned western society into one giant shit test, and it's failing miserably.

The only bright light on the horizon is the last few months I'm hearing more women say things like "men just aren't manly enough anymore" or "where are all the real men" or one who told me "sometimes women just want to be taken" (unfortunately it turned out she had double v.d. so that was a no-go, LOL).

Women have shit-tested manly men into oblivion but now they're starting to cycle back to wanting them again.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They always have you're just in the position to see it now.

It's a good place to be

[–]BigBoiBahmani 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Being aware of your emotions, especially heightened emotions like anger or sadness will allow you to hold frame even when you are emoting.

Literally if you feel like crying just try to be aware that "This thing is making me sad. Okay."

Think of emotions/internal monologue/hamstering like trains on the railway station of your mind. You can step on the train mindlessly and it can take you to a loop of negative re-enforcement. Just being aware that this train can take me somewhere allows you to emote and not step on your own dick while doing so, and not get manipulated. And helps in stopping when need be.

And anger is a tool. Not a response or a reaction. It is a tool that can provide you strength, fortitude, the ability to assert yourself and not get pushed around. Anger management requires just the acknowledgement of this fact that this is a tool not a reaction. Immediately for some, slowly for some, but the acknowledgement of this fact shifts your mind's mental models to stop using anger as a reaction but a tool. The line between reaction and tool is thin, and only is defined by whether you can start and stop when you should.

[–]Proto_Sigma 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I dropped a few tears when my main girl's 35 year old sister was sitting in an urn at the front of the church after overdosing. The rule is never cry in front of your woman. Whatever, a misty eye is nothing to be ashamed of.

You get a pass for a tear or two at family funerals if your girl isn't totally insane.

Even then shake it off once the proceedings are over.

[–]Jeffspark 8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The point is that we subconsciously build these walls around our minds and box ourselves into a limited life. Those invisible walls could be a conditioned social rule, or a “principle” that you tell yourself that you live by.

The key is to realize that those walls are invisible and they actually don’t have to exist, and that they’re limiting you in what you could do.

[–]MakeSail 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The power of the mind, it can be a prison or a paradise. You decide.

[–]offtheshitproductive 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Just adding a note, the guy who livestreamed his felony is the same guy you linked to under newly weds telling you to do more chores to get sex. Just thought it was interesting

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh he's got a history of being a retard. I even did a video on him as a cautionary example.

I've got a ton of examples like him I just find him the funniest

[–]AllocNeighley 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

How to read a book

If you want to tackle the world, improve your reading and thinking.

Are you uninformed, misinformed, incomplete analysis or irrational.

The opposite to this is complete reasoning. Don't assume someone knows 100% what they are talking about. Think critically about what you take in and how it fits in your view

[–]BigBoiBahmani 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

True. View things as resources and act accordingly.

Putting anything on a pedestal is a weak man's mindset.

"You can't chase pussy when you are busy sucking dick."

[–]AllocNeighley 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You can't chase pussy when you are busy sucking dick"

Solid reply

Don't be a pussy. You can't put pussy inside pussy

[–]hopealllost 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Most people have no idea what they're doing

[–]daproest1 9 points10 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

Man it’s horrible. I’m 33 and I feel like I’m 23. I did ok. Started a business. Which I still have. But I dropped out of school, and didn’t marry the girl. Cuz I thought I was “young” at 29-30. I didn’t know. I was busy growing the business. I didn’t know what else to do.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 9 points10 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I joined the military late at 23 didn't have a corporate job till 35 and write my first book at 38.

People still call my young pup so it's clearly not a big deal to change your mind and define a new purpose or stick with what you have

[–]daproest1 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Corporate job at 35 huh... 🤔 u still in it?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Naw. Did it for a few years, and the money was great but I didn't like commute times and not having anything to show for my work at the end of the day so I stopped.

[–]daproest1 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Oh shit it’s you. Just noticed. Yeah man but you’ve been w your girl for like 11 years. U have that continuity of narrative. Hard to start over in your mid 30s.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Naw man, girl wasn't my anchor. had I left my life up to her in that way I'd likely have been fucked.

[–]daproest1 -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree. That’s not what I meant.

[–]BoJvck34Empire 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

But I dropped out of school, and didn’t marry the girl.

That is exactly what you wanted at the time, and your business is still churning. From the outside looking in, you made the right choice. If you couldn’t marry the girl and do the business then she wasn’t for you then..

[–]daproest1 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

She helped me build it. We got together when we were both NOTHING. I was an idiot. Immature.

[–]BoJvck34Empire 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Ouchhh. But remember, no guarantees that the marriage would have worked. You live and you learn.

[–]daproest1 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Woulda worked. She was young. She saw me as a demigod for a while lol you can keep em like that when u marry em and move em away before their environment, and other shitty women, ruins em

[–]BoJvck34Empire -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I’ll keep that in mind.. Thank you.

[–]daproest1 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

19-23 with low n-count (below 4, 3 or less) is the sweet spot.

[–]dingleburry_joe 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hoping your next book focuses nore on this. The first had some good shit but want more of this.

[–]1arakouzo 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's difficult for most humans to be given a blank sheet of paper and told to do something with it.

If you pick a bad "mission" and waste your life pursuing it, smug with self-satisfaction because "the mission is you", that's time and resources you never get back. You're now holding a torn, wet, burned, wrinkled piece of paper with useless scribbles all over it because the first few things you did with that blank sheet of paper sucked and made you sad instead of happy. And now you have to make the best of whatever you have left because you were an idiot who thought that doing whatever you want because you want it counts as a worthwhile "mission" and you wasted your life thinking that silly idea.

[–]BoJvck34Empire 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you for sharing . Someone needs to hear this

[–]BigBoiBahmani 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Rian as always with a great post explaining mental point of origin and why there is nothing in life that can be greater than this, no matter how much anyone copes. Blackpillers, TradCons, PurplePillers and the lot, can keep coping and deluding themselves all they like. What angers and what I can't stand listening to them.

Some people really are just meant to be meat-shields, to be played with and it shows. Much like how the twitch or onlyfans e girls show disdain and hatred towards their subscribers in their subreddits or communities because they have to listen to their bullshit.

It is all incredible, yet frustrating.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Naw, it's awesome. It means no one is out to get us, they are just gonna do their thing. No 'they' level enemies destroying the west, No genetic talent barriers to 99% of what I want to achieve.

The only thing missing is a head on my shoulders and a little resolve.

[–]armenian_UwUcide 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

No one has a fucking clue what to do, and anyone who says otherwise is selling you something or demanding you reassure them they are doing it right

I hope GLO doesn’t see this.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If he wants to have another temper tantrum about how alpha he is thats his business

[–]GitGud_Pirates_Inc 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

True, but I find Corey Wayne to know what he's doing. But that could just be me and my friend who suggested him.

I'd read "How to be a 3% man% by Corey Wayne 10 - 15 times and I honestly plan to give my future kid that book as well as much advice as I can learn so he can be better and become closer to the idea of "having an idea of what they are doing.

I am trash at initiating conversation and I am still trying to get social skills as my parents went out of their way to stop me from hanging out with anyone. I plan to read some more books and then I just need to push myself to just talk to people and join groups to do things I enjoy.

I learned a lot of morals and principles from boyscouts but seeing as that organization is falling apart I'm going to have to teach them to someone.

There's a lot of low quality women out there and everyone's different in what they want, they say to find one that has it all together and again corey wayne helps with that, I personally love helping people become better and I do it because I love to see them do better, I found a woman who wants to better and I've helped over the past couple of years become better and plan to make significantly better with the years to come.

I have little to no understanding of the dynamic of friendships or asking people to hangout really any of it but it's about changing that and I plan to change all that while pursuing the certifications I want, the job I want, graduating.

I've had to learn to not be so nice because I was honestly too nice just to people I mean probably in a relationship but I try to recognize it and have made changes. The old nice guys finish last.

I 100% believe that what you want and expect you should essentially demand and try to not let yourself get complacent, be hella assertive, exude assertiveness.

I've found a lot of resources from here only having just joined recently and I'm definitely one that doesn't know what to do, but you know, fuck it, right, just get better, learn more, always try to improve, be positive, consistently tell yourself positive things and stop those negative thoughts, it makes a big difference.

[–]ibwriting 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Glad to see you bring back the real.

Now get back to work coach!

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRStonePT[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The coach was the one who stormed DC

[–]ibwriting 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

that was their patron exclusive content.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2023. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter