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Slutty Flings and Virginal Rings: 9 Chicks To Do Before You Die. I Mean, Marry

March 30, 2014

I see a TON of gals asking "where have all the good men gone" and are so pissed at all the girls that get all the guys. But these girls you are jealous of are generally not good women. I have generally dated the "bad girl" types that I am always attracted to because there really attractive, exciting, and fawn all over me. Unfortunately, the majority of them have lied, cheated, and manipulated the shit out of our relationships. I have no doubt that I will end up with a "nice gal" and I can tell you with a fair amount of confidence that most guys will because no guy with self respect marries a slut. I hope for the reformed slut, but she is a rare bird and once she's reformed, who is to say she'll be so exciting anymore? Anyway, keep hope alive ladies, most of you sound like very caring, kind, and interesting women who have a lot to offer.

So to all the nice gals out there: wait for us. I know right now it seems like men are just humping and dumping the Bad Girls, but once we get it out of our system, we are going to want to settle down with that nice young virgin. We know Sally Slut and Hottie Hookup aren't marriage material, but right now our priorities are just having fun. We know that when we're ready, when it's time to get serious and marry, we're going to go for you, Cathy Churchgal.

So before we put a ring on Victoria Virgin, these are the 9 Chicks to Do Before You Die ... I mean, "get married."

  1. Betty Blowjob: This is the girl that just gets off on giving blowjobs. Every man has to try these girls out at least once. Bonus: lots of blowjobs.

  2. Regnia Richgirl: You'll have amazing fun screwing in her bedroom and having her parents feed you Whole Foods after. Bonus: her parents will buy the condoms.

  3. Francesca Fling: This is the hot girl you meet at a nightclub who will be your "friends with benefits" for a while. Bonus: you'll probably get a threesome out of it.

  4. Cathy Cougar: Every guy needs to bed an older woman. She'll teach you a few tricks, wear you out on a regular basis, and pay for dinner. Bonus: You'll do it at her place, which is way nicer than yours.

  5. Jenna Jailbait: The day she becomes legal. Bonus: she just became legal.

  6. Edie Eurochick: She's only in New York for a summer internship, and she wants to bang a geniune American guy. Bonus: your accent will work in your favor for once.

  7. Samantha Sporty: She's the athletic type, full of energy and an amazingly toned body. Bonus: you'll probably get to do her in her team uniform.

  8. Chelsea Crazychick: Hot and crazy, amazing sex, lots of drama. Bonus: you'll know why they say "never stick your dick in crazy."

  9. Fannie Feminist: Zzzzzz. Boring. She won't even make you a sandwich. Every interaction will be problematized to make sure it doesn't reinforce The Patriarchy. Bonus: she likes it rough, dirty and humiliating.

My total: 9/9 - not too shabby!

OK. I showed mine now you show yours. How many on the list have you crossed off and do you think my criteria are too rigid?



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Post Information
Title Slutty Flings and Virginal Rings: 9 Chicks To Do Before You Die. I Mean, Marry
Author jacks1000
Upvotes 86
Comments 25
Date March 30, 2014 3:47 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit /r/TheRedPill
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/slutty-flings-and-virginal-rings-9-chicks-to-do.13293
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/21r2pz/slutty_flings_and_virginal_rings_9_chicks_to_do/
Red Pill terms in post

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

  1. Dad's Girl Gina - She's banging you because you are a colour that her Daddy disapproves of. She gets off on talking about your ethinicity during sex Bonus: The danger of being caught is genuinely fun sometimes

  2. Sociopathic Sophie - She has a boyfriend and deliberately lets him walk in on the two of you bumping uglies because she enjoys doing breakups in that method. Bonus: None

  3. Married Mary - She's bored of her husband now and wants a nice young man to come over and bang her discreetly. Bonus: She'll treat you better than she ever does her husband!

[–]Dat_Black_Guy 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah, Gina...i remember her quite well

[–]1talldarkandhandsome 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I got a 2for1 deal on a Gina Sophie combo once. Ah emily............that was a good weekend :)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sociopathic Sophie

I am finding more and more of these...

[–]InternetFree 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You should apply as a writer for Cosmo magazine.

[–]charlie_bodango 11 points12 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Some of these chicks are more than one category. Do you marry one who's all nine?

[–]jacks1000[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Do you marry one who's all nine?


[–]Silverbacked 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

How does Jailbait and Cougar simultaneously work? Mother, daughter threesome?

[–]charlie_bodango 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'll allow it

[–]carrotcake4 32 points33 points  (22 children) | Copy Link

Virgin, sweet girl here. How long will it take you guys to "finish up"? In a few years I'll be 25 and "hit the wall". I can't wait that long.

[–]bossbang 18 points19 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Carrotcake, not all of us want to do this. In my opinion, OP just posted a man version of "riding the cock carousel."

I'd be much happier with a virgin sweet girl than having banged betty crocker or whatever nonsense.

Source: I will be 25 in a few years and am not interested in picking up waves of women. We exist.

[–]jacks1000[S] 23 points24 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

a man version of "riding the cock carousel."

It's called "the pussy wagon."

[–]bossbang 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The more you know!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

:::::trumpets sound::::: dooo-Dooooooo!

Announcer: "Arriving from the Valley of Light, Sir Clarence of the White!"

::::the women in the crowd chastise their men about not being as gallant::::

Clarence: Dear lady, fear not, these are merely tales of fantasy men who are rare in that they would mount more than one damsel in what's called a "cock carousel", a term I both despise and have never heard of; should you give me a moment of your time I will court you for days on end and give myself to you.

[–]Endorsed ContributorInvalidity 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah... I really read that as coming from a male apologist.

"We aren't all like that!" No kidding, he isn't.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper 22 points23 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You aren't marketing well.

We're only doing this because quality women are too scarce to look for.

[–]Mymobileacoconut 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I don't think this is a serious post...

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Who exactly are you waiting for? Men your own age? Go for someone in their late twenties to early thirties who has their shit together.

And when I say 'Go for', I don't mean throw yourself at them, just subtly make it known you are available.

[–]redpilldude 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Date older men, like 5-6 years older than you.

[–]carrotcake4 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I will

[–]jacks1000[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

have an upvote :)

[–]carrotcake4 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

lol thank you.

[–]jacobman 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You don't have to wait. There are men in all situations around you right now. Btw, you can date people older than you :P The better question is how do you know when you have the right guy, and what can you do to filter out the guys that aren't ready?

[–]theozoph 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

You should already have found yours (a 30-ish guy). What's your girl game like?

[–]carrotcake4 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

It's average I still need to develop it more. My problem is that I meet very few men.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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