http://www.gutenberg.org/files/45109/45109-h/45109-h.htm

Epicetus was the son of a woman slave, born between 50 and 60 A.D. at Hieropolis in Phrygia. He became a slave of one of Nero’s distinguished freedmen who served as the Emperor’s secretary. While in service, Epictetus took courses with Musonius Rufus, the fashionable Stoic philosopher, who taught him to be a philosopher himself.

The Enchiridion is a field manual for Roman combat officers, in which the knowledge of personal control is emphasized.

A RP integrated man can directly correlate the maxims in the Enchiridion, specifically outcome independence, abundance mentality, and self awareness. I’ve selected a few maxims that have been useful in my personal life, and I encourage you to read the entirety of Epicetus’ teachings yourself. These maxims have brought me confidence and peace in my relationships with others and hopefully will do the same for all of you.

1st maxim - “There are things which are within our power, and there are things which are beyond our power. Within our power are opinion, aim, desire, aversion, and, in one word, whatever affairs are our own. Beyond our power are body, property, reputation, office, and, in one word, whatever are not properly our own affairs.”

Outcome independence - When falling upon hard times, remember that everything is within your control and not worth worrying about. If the situation is within your control, do not worry because you can handle it. If the situation is beyond your control, do not worry because you have control over your reaction to the situation.

3rd maxim - “With regard to whatever objects either delight the mind or contribute to use or are tenderly beloved, remind yourself of what nature they are, beginning with the merest trifles: if you have a favorite cup, that it is but a cup of which you are fond of—for thus, if it is broken, you can bear it; if you embrace your child or your wife, that you embrace a mortal—and thus, if either of them dies, you can bear it.”

Abundance mentality – nothing in life is special, and nothing belongs to you. A cup is a cup, a woman is a woman, and AWALT. There’s always more fish in the sea, and more cups at the store.

5th maxim – “Men are disturbed not by things, but by the views which they take of things. Thus death is nothing terrible, else it would have appeared so to Socrates. But the terror consists in our notion of death, that it is terrible. When, therefore, we are hindered or disturbed, or grieved, let us never impute it to others, but to ourselves—that is, to our own views.”

Mindfulness – we as men are not bothered by things that happen to us, but our reactions to them. If something terrible happens, stop and ask yourself “is this really such a big deal in the grand scheme of things?” Weak men stay transfixed on their emotions, stoic men accept them and move on. Death is inevitable - enjoy life for all it has to offer.

10th maxim – “Upon every accident, remember to turn toward yourself and inquire what faculty you have for its use. If you encounter a handsome person, you will find continence the faculty needed; if pain, then fortitude; if reviling, then patience. And when thus habituated, the phenomena of existence will not overwhelm you.”

Self-Awareness – Take any misfortune and consider “How would I react differently if this was considered a gift?” The BB man’s day is ruined if he spills coffee on his shirt, the AF man knows that the rest of his life is fine and swaps his shirt with no ill feelings.

12th maxim – “Never say of anything, “I have lost it,” but, “I have restored it.” Has your child died? It is restored. Has your wife died? She is restored. Has your estate been taken away? That likewise is restored. “But it was a bad man who took it.” What is it to you by whose hands he who gave it has demanded it again? While he permits you to possess it, hold it as something not your own, as do travelers at an inn.”

Abundance mentality/thoughtfulness – Nothing in life belongs to you, and a fool would think the opposite. Everything in life is temporary, and do not dwell on the negative. Embracing the understanding that everything in life is temporary allows one to stop worrying about what can be lost and puts focus on the future.

13th maxim – “If you ever happen to turn your attention to externals, for the pleasure of anyone, be assured that you have ruined your scheme of life. Be content, then, in everything, with being a philosopher; and if you wish to seem so likewise to anyone, appear so to yourself, and it will suffice you.”

External validation – If you allow things outside of yourself to validate you (women, money, cars, power), you will be depressed when these things are no longer in your life. Look inward for validation, and be proud of your hard work and way of life. The only person who can love you the way you need to be loved is yourself.