I think it's true that whether or not you were able to get a girl, or preferably a few girls, in High School shapes the way you feel about your place in the world of inter-gender relations. Hopefully, if you were a loser in High School, you realized that self-coddling your precious feelings in this regard is meaningless; the only way out is to dig your way up. A lot of you here are doing that, and good on all ya'll.

Then there is the "poor me" reaction where the person becomes a human Eeyore, and ends up as a thirty-year-old virgin on 4Chan wishing he had cancer (I cannot find the link to this, but I saw a screen-capped 4Chan post on Twitter about how great cancer would be as compared to being an aging virgin, which honestly made me equal parts sad and disgusted).

But, if you think the world gave you an unfair hand of cards, and you think everyone absolutely sucks for not seeing how awesome you clearly are, you can develop a fragile ego!

A fragile ego is the opposite of confidence, although at times the outward projection of a fragile ego may mimic confidence, it can only be situationally confident at best and is built upon a weak frame, so this frame can be easily shattered.

Think of the fragile ego like a pendulum; deep down the person knows they suck, so they need to project that they are great- the harder it swings toward the inner-truth, the harder it must swing toward acting like Ravishing Rick Rude.

My friend Donny didn't get any girls in High School, and reacted to this by creating a fragile ego, and now that he's over thirty, it's an absolute mess.

Donny needs to grab onto feelings of superiority at all times; like a superiority junky. In debate, Donny must always be right; Donny constantly value proofs and must always be smarter and more successful than his friends; Donny makes a ton of petty criticisms and becomes irritated when I laugh them off- although he doesn't have the vocabulary for it, Donny doesn't like it when he loses a frame control face-off (that he initiates).

Finally, of course, Donny becomes angry and confused when his friends manage to get girls and Donny is your typical thirsty begger faux-Alpha. And, even worse, you can tell it irritates Donny that I don't attach the same kind of ego-investment to dating women and having sex that he does; I don't use women to value proof- while this may be subconscious to Donny, it reveals a deficiency that hammers down his fragile ego.

So when Donny asked me to help him out with relating to women, and inter-gender relations, I broke LAW 30: Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless (I actually broke several LAWs), and thought I would introduce Donny to the world of Red Pill and Game.

In anticipating of our hangout, I wrote up a brief outline of The Red Pill and Red Pill Game, what I learned through my own experiences and what I learned from being entrenched in Red Pill theory for the past two-and-a-half years.

Donny began our session as guys usually do by asking a question that would help his situation with a specific girl. I told Donny how none of that mattered, and that this lesson was of far more importance... so Donny gave me the floor and I gave him a fantastic introduction on The Red Pill... but when I would pepper in my own hits and misses with girls, I could detect Donny's agitation.

Again, I never attached an ego-identity to my interactions with women; in fact, I never really discussed my sex-life with Donny at all outside of the girls who became LTRs... so when I would illustrate a point with Real Life Example #345, Donny would clearly get irritated; our lesson had become an assault on his fragile ego.

When I finished, Donny brought up the question about his ONEitis and I gave him the answers he was looking for.

Sigh.

As a post-script, I told Donny about Real Social Dynamics videos, telling him that in his free time to click around their different channels, and I saw Donny's face light up... at first I was confused, but then it became quite clear when Donny said, "So, all that stuff you learned from YouTube?"

Yes, it made Donny feel better thinking I was a geek; an inauthentic Alpha.

I'll say, for a second I was about to lose frame, to explain (again) the progression of my natural game, how I put the pieces together, what I got out of my LTRs, what I learned from success and failure.... but then I realized, that would be attaching my own ego to sex and dating, that would be Donny's crabs-in-a-bucket attempt at dragging me down to his level.

I cracked a smile and said, "something like that."

Lessons:

  • Confidence is good; ego is bad- learn to differentiate between the two.

  • Ego is creating an identity out of your own success; when you do not meet this expectation of success, you cannot adjust accordingly and only end up coddling your wounded identity.

  • Frame control and Amused Mastery are nearly impossible for a person who is constantly shielding their fragile ego from reality because they know that reality will never match the deluded sense of identity they have built..... and all of this mental gymnastic bullshit is in-place because the person is afraid of real self-improvement.

  • True self-improvement involves destroying the ego, dealing with the reality, and correcting deficiencies so that confidence can be attained.

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