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Two tips to end BINGE eating

January 6, 2018
38 upvotes

Summary: Be Mindful, Love Yourself

Background: I read the post outlining tips to stop overeating (good info) and I thought I would add my $.02 about a subset of overeating behavior known as binge eating. Binge eating involves the complete loss of control and frenzied consumption of hundreds and often thousands of calories in a single sitting.

This is a problem that I have struggled with for most of my life stemming from a childhood trauma (I know, I know, boo-fucking-hoo!). It resulted in me becoming morbidly obese. And, while I am still extremely fat, I have almost completely eliminated the extremely destructive binge episodes from my life. Now I just have the same problem regular fat people do, but I'm well on my way to a healthy weight having lost about 50lbs with another 100lbs to go.

Obviously, this post isn't for everyone. Binge eating is rare, but if you've got it then here are the two ways that I overcame my own binge disorder (also 4 dry grams of psilocybin mushrooms, but that's another story for another post).

1. BE MINDFUL

Mindfulness is an incredibly powerful tool. I recommend it in general, as an important aspect of a man's life.

Mindfulness involves shifting your focus to become attuned to details in the present moment. It means to stop thinking about the past or the future and simply check in to what is going on right here and now.

When I binge eat, it is as if my eyes roll into the back of my head and I lose control. I am using food to numb myself. Mostly to numb myself from negative emotions, such as anxiety, depression, loneliness, and self-loathing.

What I practiced doing was to purposefully check back in to the moment. I would not try to stop myself from binge eating. I would simply force myself to become aware and present during the binge. Attune myself to what I am feeling as I eat. Feel the emotions that are pulling on me, experience what my body is feeling, experience what I am tasting, smelling, hearing.

Again, the important thing is not to attempt to stop the behavior. Just let it happen, but make sure you experience it fully as it happens. This is mindfulness.

At first I figured that since I was going to eat all this pizza and cake and ice cream, I might as well enjoy it. Half the time I would binge and eat so fast without paying attention I would get no pleasure at all. I would be sitting there after with a stomach ache and tears running down my cheeks (not even from emotions, but just from the physical act of shoving so much food down my throat). So I resolved that if I was going to eat all this food, I was going to at least take my time and enjoy it. I treated the binge like a frightened animal, and I made no attempt to restrict myself. I simply slowed it down and tried my best to pay attention and experience the taste and texture of the food as I ate it, if only for the sake of additional pleasure.

The hilarious thing is that whenever I stopped to enjoy the food, I immediately and automatically cut my binge in half (or more). I would eat to my heart's desire, but because I was eating slowly I would feel myself getting full and then the food started to lose its taste so I just stopped, completely freely.

Over time, as my mindfulness increased, I started to notice the triggers for the binge. It was rarely related to hunger at all. It was stress, anxiety, negative emotions. Using mindfulness, I would often counter-act these negative emotions by removing myself from them and detaching from them, and checking in to the present moment. I would still experience them in a way, but more like an observer and less like a wounded animal. And I would still allow myself to eat, but now the feelings were so faint that what used to be a whole cake and half a gallon of icecream became one slice of cake with a single scoop. I know I'm repeating myself, but I never tried to consciously limit the amount I was eating. I gave my reactive animal full permission to eat his fill, but with the condition that I would sit in on the experience and pay close attention and enjoy it as much as I could.

I don't know how to describe it, but this method is like magic (for me). It's been a very long time since I've had a full-scale binge. I still over-indulge from time to time. But it's just normal-person overeating now, and not the red-hot, emotionally charged blackout with thousands of extra calories in one sitting.

Tip- to build mindfulness, practice sitting and meditating. I like to simply sit in a quiet place and focus on my breathing. Empty your mind of thoughts, and just feel the moment. Feel your body. If a thought comes, acknowledge it, and let it go. Return to the breathing. Slow, deep breaths. That's it. I do ten minutes of this a day, and it has worked wonders in my life.

2. LOVE YOURSELF

So much of binge eating involves negative judgement of myself. I feel shitty and stressed, and I cope with this by binge eating, which makes me hate myself even more and causes more stress and self-loathing, which I cope with by binge eating, and on and on in a vicious circle.

I needed to love myself. I know it sounds cheesy, and it's the type of BS that chicks talk about and use as an excuse to stay fat. But it is so true.

My new perspective: I am just a man. I am just a human male, a homo sapien, an upstanding primate. My higher consciousness can look at my animal body in a mirror, and see a frightened, emotionally reactive creature that is destroying itself with food. Where once I felt judgment and disgust, I now detach myself from the animal. It is not me, not the deepest me. It is scared and lonely and maladapted. It is not evil. It is weak, and it needs help. It deserves compassion. It deserves love. I deserve compassion. I deserve love.

I have learned to detach my higher consciousness from my animal body and all its tumultuous, reactive emotions. And in doing so, I have learned to love myself. The same way you would love a wounded gorilla. Free from judgment or resentment or hate. I have learned to see the potential beauty in myself, the strong masculine waiting to emerge from this morbid obesity. And I love him. He has not given up. He keeps fighting, keeps trying, and keeps showing love to others despite how fucked up he is. The least he can do is love himself, just show himself the cursory amount of love and compassion that he would give to any other person in his life.

And so I have. I love myself, inasmuch as I love any man or any person. And when I fuck up or when I am weak, I forgive myself and encourage myself to do better next time, instead of beating myself up and abusing myself with vicious thoughts.

By loving myself, I have eliminated one of the biggest driving forces which was a root cause of my binge eating.

Lessons Learned: Binge eating can be overcome. Become mindful, practice being present in the moment. Detach your higher consciousness from your animal self and go easy on yourself, learn to love yourself.

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Post Information
Title Two tips to end BINGE eating
Author chazthundergut
Upvotes 38
Comments 24
Date January 6, 2018 7:53 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit /r/TheRedPill
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/two-tips-to-end-binge-eating.48170
https://theredarchive.com/post/48170
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/7ohzdh/two_tips_to_end_binge_eating/
Red Pill terms in post
Comments

[–]1CoupDeGrace2212 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Seriously, the one thing I never see these type of posts mention is ironically a no-brainer:

Accept the fucking hunger.

This shit has almost become a taboo, like it's a fucking sin that you ever feel hungry in this world, besides all those fitness ads keep telling you that you should never feel hungry while getting ripped, ofc they are right!

You wanna lose weight, you gotta be on a deficit, even if you eat the most optimal diet in terms of macros and satiety it is inevitable you will get hungry from time to time, what separates those who lose the weight from those who just yo-yo back and forth is the ability to accept and deal with that hunger.

Just like if you want to get bigger you got to accept the pain of pushing past the extra rep when you feel you can't (and eat a surplus of course).

In both situations the pain is inevitable, until you can deal with it you are just bullshitting yourself with bullshit rationalizations and will inevitably give in again.

What also helps is seeing food as fuel and not as a form of pleasure or distraction, you eat to survive not to feel good, as soon as you click into that mentality nutritional garbage and binge eating will be pretty rare if not eliminated, good luck with your progress.

[–]3chazthundergut[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You are absolutely right.

I didn't mention it because this post was focused on binge eating specifically, and not overeating in general.

But yes. It's like I have a gigantic, irrational fear of being hungry. And I've come to the same conclusion as you- I've got to force myself to be uncomfortable and just be hungry. And every time I do, I realize how it's really not a big deal at all.

Accepting discomfort is a huge part of becoming a man. It probably deserves it's own post.

[–]In33dmon3yz2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Watch out for that starvation Mode tho /s

[–]AWorseManThanYou1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

haha I cringed before I saw the "/s"

[–]SolitaireOG1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah I agree - there's that cliche'd marketing tag, "Stay Hungry," but it suddenly rung like a bell in my ears a few years ago. Stay hungry with every part of my life, don't overdo any one thing. And in the literal sense, of feeling hunger and deciding that it's not necessary to immediately satiate it. That's neanderthal life creeping in, not needed in this era of abundance. I can make it a few hours without eating. I have a better workout after fasting, as well. Anyway, good post.

[–]MisterRoid-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's so true. I know a fat fuck and he starts to feel sorry for himself and act like he's dying whenever he's a little bit hungry. I have a big appetite and don't care about being lean myself, but I have little respect for people who can't endure a tiny bit of suffering.

[–]strikethrough12323 points24 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Loving your fat fuck turd of a self is absolute degeneracy. Don't force yourself to love the person shoving two large bags of Doritos into his face because he's ashamed of his weight. Instead, shed those Michelin rolls and then love yourself when you've accomplished your goals. Do you think all these land-whales and basement-dwelling omegas are preaching "self-love" because they want to be happy with their bodies? No, it's because they want society to coddle them and agree that it's okay to be a 300 pound abomination while at the same time giving themselves an excuse to stagnate and continue their unhealthy lifestyles.

[–]3chazthundergut[S] 26 points27 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I get what you're saying, believe me.

But from a practical perspective, I've spent most of my life being extremely self-critical and disgusted with myself. I've had a lot more vitriol and hatred for my fat and my weakness than you do or ever will. And the truth is, it just doesn't work in the sense that it doesn't lead to positive changes in behavior.

It wasn't until I started to go easy on myself and show myself a little compassion that I stopped binge eating.

Now I've lost 50 lbs and continue to lose weight slowly and steadily.

So yea, I get how disgusted you are with fat people and it makes perfect sense. But from a purely pragmatic "I can't stop killing myself with food and I desperately need to find a way to pull myself out of hell" perspective, I am sharing the shift in mindset that actually gave me results.

And I'm not suggesting that you as a normal person should love fat people. This is a post directed at the 300 lb incel who already hates himself more than you can imagine and has spent years abusing his body.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You're doing what you need to be doing. Period. Cheers.

[–]foreveralphablog2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I know exactly what you mean mate. I used to binge about 5-6 years ago, granted I was never fat, but I can tell you now it came from lower self-esteem.

Low self-esteem leaves a gaping hole that tends to be filled with some kind of addiction. In our cases in the past, it was food.

I'm currently bulking and struggling to eat enough calories - that was unheard of 5-6 years ago!

[–]1OneRedYear14 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Hating myself didn't get me out of the bag of doritos. It made me dive deeper. Shame, loathing,guilt and depression is why I overeat in the first place. I got mad and I knew I deserved better than this and nobody was going to fix it but me. Down 100lbs now. 40 more to go.

[–]3chazthundergut[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly. Congrats man, keep it up.

[–]RatioRegnum4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's not who he is, and that's not what he's doing. He's identified his issue, made changes and is making progress on it.

[–]cashmoney_x5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is a very ignorant post.

[–]AWorseManThanYou4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I am not an overeater, but I too am a man with failings. I feel like your part about seeing your body divorced from your consciousness, and having compassion for the body with its weaknesses is a comment I could read everyday.

I know that the majority won't understand the significance of this sort of love, forgiveness, and self-compassion. Regardless, write a post. PM it to me if it gets heckled by those who stare at shadows.

[–]3chazthundergut[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks buddy. Glad you could relate to some of the underlying themes.

[–]ADeadDawg3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well written OP. I’ll never understand why some of these garbage posts get 500+ upvotes and read like they were written by a blind homeless man. I can at least feel the message you are trying to get across here. Anyway, here’s an upvote.. Also, stop stocking your cabinets with delicious (unhealthy) foods. Chicken, potatoes, broccoli man, chicken, potatoes, broccoli.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Also look into panax ginseng, has some good studies to back up its ability to curb binge eating due to stress

[–]Andgelyo1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Heard that stuff makes your dick hard AF too, I take some of that before a smash session

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Um yeah. Last night it was so hard it hurt lol if that makes sense?

[–]antariusz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Works alright for me, I’ve never tried viagra, so I can’t compare, but better than nothing, not sure if just placebo though.

[–]1empatheticapathetic1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Happy for your progress and realisations. But have you looked into keto?

[–]cashmoney_x1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You are on a great path man this is very inspiring and on original take on a well treaded issue. Congrats.

[–]MisterRoid1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think you make a good point. When you actually take time to enjoy what you are eating, you don't need as much of it. I remember when I was a teenager and would eat 0.5l of icecream, followed by 200g of chocolate, possibly half a bag of chips and then wash it all down with 1.5l of soda, lol. All in all, that amounts to 2000+ calories of junk. I still have a soft spot for soda and icecream, but nowadays I rarely have more than 1/10 of that, and enjoy it much more.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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