When someone tells you he/she is not ready for a relationship...

MentORPHEUS · 2016-02-18T18:02:07+00:00

Running it through Redpill Translate:

"I'm not ready for a relationship."

Beep, bop, boop

"I don't want a relationship with YOU."

2016-02-18T18:13:29+00:00

tl;dr

Translation of "I'm Not Ready for a Relationship"

Female - "You can't have exclusive access to my pussy."

Male - "You can't have exclusive access to my time and attention."

Kudos to the few women who actually say this and won't string you along or cheat.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2016-02-18T17:25:10+00:00

I think the confusion lies in the fact the sexes use the term differently, but it's simply really, if a man says he's not ready for a relationship, he's putting aside relationships to focus on the other things in his life, like work. If a woman says it, well women think only in the moment, and in this moment you're so repulsive to her she'd rather be a nun than go out with you.

MrSnarf26 · 2016-02-18T17:51:13+00:00

This was usually the go to line for ending sexual relations with me when I was younger from girls. It usually went something like "I need to be single, not ready for a relationship, I need to find myself, yada yada yada." When I was younger I believed it just like the life pro tip suggests. I thought well darn it I'll be here when she is ready, and I'm going to respect that and be understanding and she will see that! Without fail two to three weeks after getting this line the girls were being plowed by someone else. It IS not a nice line to use to break up with someone because it keeps them on the hook if they are actually listening to your words. In fact I would say it's one of the worst ways to break up with a guy.
That being said, I get it. On the surface and from the females perspective it looks rosey and nice. "Look I'm not ready, but your so nice, I'm just not ready see?" It's so easy to say, but so dishonest if you know to pay attention to actions and not words. These days if I hear that I ghost and then sure enough I hear that they miss me a few days later. That is what should be taught. If you just sit there and argue and communicate more about it does nothing but solidify their choice to chase someone else.

gonorealover · 2016-02-18T19:53:11+00:00

I think this just simply falls under the Brad Pitt rule. Would she tell Brad Pitt that she's not ready for a relationship? Of course not.

LeftShark86 · 2016-02-18T17:41:43+00:00

The appropriate response to this is "I'm not looking for a relationship either. I simply enjoyed the sex and company. No hard feelings. I'll see you around". This demonstrates you have little invested in the relationship and were around only because it was beneficial to you at the time. Also, this gives you a clean break that can easily develop into a few booty calls here and there without much work or drama. This conversation is really letting you off the hook for commitment more than it is about letting you go.

2016-02-18T19:56:52+00:00

To put it in a nutshell:

To women, everything is personal. Principles and consistent behavior are male.

Whatever a woman says, positive or negative, no matter what it sounds like, she's saying because it's you. Reality doesn't exist.

zyk0s · 2016-02-18T21:31:22+00:00

I found myself agreeing with that particular life pro tip. Why would I invest my energy into developing a relationship with someone who isn't ready for one? Fine by me if she tells me she isn't ready, I'm not looking to her for one anyway. These days, you don't need to be in a relationship to smash privates with somebody.

SocialJusticeWhiner · 2016-02-18T17:32:25+00:00

I don't think OP is wrong but I think this can also be a shit-test. I overcame it once by soft nexting the girl for 4 or 5 days. It worked because she was trying to put me in the beta box and SNing her communicated higher value.

zyk0s · 2016-02-18T21:52:00+00:00

What if she says she doesn't want a relationship but still wants to sleep with you?

MattyAnon · 2016-02-18T22:17:49+00:00

Woman "not ready for a relationship" = she's not ready for a relationship with you

Man "not ready for a relationship" = he wants to continue fucking other women. (I use this line with women).

tb87670 · 2016-02-19T04:18:53+00:00

Just got this exact saying a few days ago with a St. Valentines fling I had. Not ready for a relationship, she said this right after I acted polite to her a few times. Vapid bitches don't get I'm typically polite to most people unless they have wronged me. The plate I banged a few times on New Years Eve and Christmas told me she wanted to be single, then the next day re-opened her OKCupid account and put new pictures up I never seen before. It's a lie when women say that, exactly as OP states. Basically they are saying 'I don't want a relationship with you anymore' and it is a result of not inducing enough tingles.

SharpieKing69 · 2016-04-08T15:11:37+00:00

If someone ever tells you this, especially via texting or any other form of messaging, their goal is to preserve their reputation. They'll likely do this over messaging and not face to face because it gives them more control over the situation. If they didn't care about neither you nor their reputation, they would be ghosting you. If they actually cared about their reputation and you, they'd be honest with you. Since they are going the deception route, they only care about their reputation.

The best way to respond to this is to deny them what they want: the feeling of having preserved their reputation. Believe it or not, the way to do this is NOT by being angry or insulting. That gives them an out by saying you are crazy and they dodged a bullet. The way to accomplish this is by being as vague and devoid of emotion as possible. This works especially well if the person is a female because women read more into emotions than guys do, so lacking emotion frustrates them and makes it harder for them to know if they've preserved their reputation or not.

Keeping this in mind, when the person gives you the "not ready" speech, the best way to respond is simply with "Ok". No additional details or reaction. Don't send "K" or anything else to try to infuse sassiness into your responses. You want to be as robotic as possible without coming off as being insulting/mocking. They'll be looking for that out in everything you say. Responding with just "Ok" will drive the person crazy and they'll keep digging to get a read on what you think of them. Do not give any indication of this, remain on the surface as much as possible. They'll probably say they want to remain friends thinking that if you accept, that means you think positively of them. Do not accept this offer, respond simply by saying you're not looking for more friends right now and you're only interested in being involved with them romantically. Do not elaborate or provide further insight into your motivations for these responses.

If they're giving you the "not ready" speech, then you are likely beyond the point of no return with them not being interested and cannot change that. If there is a chance of that changing, it certainly will not come from you chasing after them. Your only chance of them having a change of heart is for you to go "no contact" and let them miss the thought of you. Don't focus or hope for that because it's highly unlikely. Save your dignity by not letting their last interaction with you being their emotional reassurance to cover up their bad behavior. They won't change as long as people keep catering to their happiness. Your feelings and needs matter too. Don't compromise that for someone that doesn't agree with that statement.

nia_kills · 2016-02-18T17:36:01+00:00

Commitment / sex. Who controls it

AK27ABROAD · 2016-02-19T04:03:50+00:00

In all fairness I say this to women all the time…but if I actually found a worthy woman, I would be "ready."

The-Ban-Hammer · 2016-02-21T13:40:17+00:00

This "I'm not ready for a relationship" is very similar to "Let's take things slowly."

The former can be a "let down easily" but can also bleed into the latter, which is where the girl is charitable enough to let the foolish male take her on an early date and then go their separate ways afterward because she "has to get up early for work" (she'll go to fuck her chad; he'll go home and spank it to porn, pretending that soon he'll be fucking her).

Either line used will not lead to anything but frustration on the part of the male. If the woman is evil about it, she'll continue to use him for "pre-sex" free meals, go to fuck her real guy, and then laugh at the poor beta billy. This shit does happen.

iLLprincipLeS · 2016-02-18T19:39:04+00:00

What she means if she says it, is that you did not fuck her as good as the other guy.

As for you telling her that? Why would you? If she is the desperate commitment type just play along and let her call herself whatever she wants. It's not like the magical word girlfriend would stop you from spinning plates.

TheMGhandi · 2016-02-19T04:35:46+00:00

For every 1700 subscribers they have only 1 active sub. Those numbers are terrible and that subreddit won't go anywhere in the next decade.

Title	When someone tells you he/she is not ready for a relationship...
Author	zyk0s
Upvotes	72
Comments	34
Date	February 18, 2016 4:53 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/46fonm/when_someone_tells_you_heshe_is_not_ready_for_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/when-someone-tells-you-heshe-is-not-ready-for-a.56372 https://theredarchive.com/post/56372