~ archived since 2018 ~

Why my Oneitis didn't like me

November 21, 2015
40 upvotes

Disclaimer I'm not sure if this belongs on TRP. It doesn't match the quality of the standard TRP post but I don't care, it might help some others as hopeless as me who have not yet gotten past the hurdle of oneitis.

Body I've finally figured out why my oneitis didn't like me by the end of our brief time of knowing each other after being exceedingly interested in me when we met. I was aware of all the reasons but for whatever reason it never hit me properly until now.

I had depleted all reasons she might have liked me in the first place

When we met I was:

  • A rockstar

  • Mysterious

  • Had same interests

  • Seemingly emotionally distant

  • Seemingly experienced

  • Dominant at times

  • Uninterested in her beyond superficiality

  • and unwilling to make more than basic effort.

By the end I:

  • Had given away too much information about myself; No mystery left

  • Wasn't as strong and forthcoming as I should have been.

  • Was too nice to her

  • Talked way too much

  • Was too available and emotional to her

  • Didn't even escalate anywhere near to sex, pretty much the main reason she was even interested in me to begin with

  • Was always interested in having nice conversations. Never talked about sex or anything.

  • Too interested

Respect was at zero. Gladly I recognised that and ended communication fairly quick after I realised. But I made sure to wrap myself in a beautiful desexualised beta box before I left.

Pros about this situation

  • I found TRP, learned the SMP dynamics and AWALT

  • I was ejected from the situation (an LDR I was gunning for) before anything more damaging to my ego could have occurred.

If we lived closer then it would have gone a lot smoother and I wouldn't have made nearly as many mistakes but the outcome would have been the same because of the way I was and AWALT.

This realisation has brought me back to who I was before I even met her. Charisma, motivation, a realistic view of other women has returned. Thanks to TRP I now have a wealth of knowledge on how to (attempt to) avoid all of these mistakes and have an even better experience than I would have ever had, and my motivation has returned in spades.

Good habits have been set and new skills & knowledge have been learned because of it.

EDIT: I'm so glad this has resonated with a few people. This has honestly taken me way too long to figure out. I started reading 'The Power Of Now' and after not thinking about TRP or anything at all, it all fell into place for me. I just needed some distance from it to be able to process it objectively.

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Post Information
Title Why my Oneitis didn't like me
Author empatheticapathetic
Upvotes 40
Comments 23
Date November 21, 2015 4:36 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit /r/TheRedPill
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/why-my-oneitis-didnt-like-me.38299
https://theredarchive.com/post/38299
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3tnnx7/why_my_oneitis_didnt_like_me/
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