One of the reasons The Red Pill is at odds with the rest of society is that modern society has decided to declare war on the old-school society that came before it. (Despite the fact that the society that came before was so fabulously successful that it made modern society, with all of its radical notions and lavish extravagances, possible.) The notions set forth in The Red Pill run contrary to just about everything modern society would like to establish, but are actually quite in line with the old-school society that came before – with the main difference being that The Red Pill actually says this shit aloud, whereas back in the “good ol’ days”, nobody had to because that was just how things were understood to be. So I guess there’s an argument to be made that by actually putting words to these ideas that weren’t usually verbalized in the past, we’re somehow more radical than what came before.

Modern society believes that there is no such thing as gender. That we’re all just equal humans full of equal potential, equal opportunity, equal value, and if there’s any justice in the universe, equal achievements and outcomes. Part of this war on gender involves a societal push to eradicate gender roles. The Red Pill is really just a set of lessons in gender roles. How to be more stereotypically masculine in a world that pretends to piss all over masculinity (while secretly rewarding it behind the scenes), and how to recognize and pursue stereotypical femininity in a world that’s, sadly, done a pretty good job of stamping femininity out.

When I first married my wife, long ago, we didn’t stick to traditional gender roles in our marriage. I did the bulk of the traditional “woman’s work”. After working my ass off at the office all day, I came home and cooked dinner, washed the dishes, did the laundry, spearheaded our grocery trips on the weekend. We hired a service to clean – it took too long to clean the big-ass house I was paying for, and I suck at cleaning. My wife didn’t do nothing, mind you. We were playing toward our skills. She has a real mind for organization, so after I made her a kickass spreadsheet to keep track of everything, she would catalog receipts, keep track of our budget, and pay bills each month for us. She’d also keep track of our various service providers and when they were coming to fix or build or clean or maintain something, and after we had a kid, she’d plan kid events, find kid activities, plan our weekends, and set all of that up.

Everything worked really smoothly, yet our marriage was terrible. We fought constantly, we had sex less than once a month, my wife openly disrespected me in front of others and in front of our child, pissed on and minimized everything I did for our family. We’d make up afterward (in a non-sexual way, of course), usually involving a series of back-handed apologies from my wife. The usual woman way of apologizing: “You’re a good husband, but” followed by a politely-phrased criticism that justifies why she behaved the way she did.

I could never figure out why she was so angry when she had it so easy. I did the bulk of the housework, made a shit-ton of money, took good care of her and of our child, and she didn’t have to do all that much. Yet the few things she did have to do, she complained about constantly, like she didn’t feel she should have to do even that small handful of things. Like I had unfairly burdened her.

The fact is, she was right. I was just missing the message. My wife was not complaining about the quantities of work we were doing, nor the difficulty of the work involved. She was complaining because I had handed off all of the man-work to her, while hiding behind woman-work to look busy.

Honestly, going grocery shopping, planning, prepping, and cooking meals, doing laundry and folding clothes – a lot of that work is physically more tedious and more difficult than sitting at the computer paying bills and doing our family budget. Calling up service providers and getting shit fixed around the house? Using the internet to find an activity for the family this weekend? That shit is easy to do. Much easier than the woman-work. I thought I was doing my wife a favor by taking care of all of this tedious stuff, and all she had to do was make a few administrative decisions and keep track of things for us.

Yes, in many ways, the man-work involved in leading the family is physically easier than the woman-work that maintains the house (excepting the obvious grueling man-work like building and repairing shit and moving heavy stuff around). Handling your family budget, planning family activities, coordinating what’s going on in the house and when – that shit isn’t hard to do. But it’s important. The responsibility involved in that man-work is huge compared to the woman-work. If the laundry doesn’t get done for a couple of weeks, it’s not the end of the world. If dinner burns, your order pizza. But if the bills don’t get paid, the lights get turned off and shit accrues interest and costs the family a lot of money. It’s far more catastrophic.

Even though my wife’s tasks around the house were technically easier to complete, she felt burdened by the responsibility. Responsibility she felt that she was forced to undertake while I busied myself with “easier” (e.g., less significant) work like dinner and laundry.

Women run from responsibility. You can barely get a woman to decide what restaurant to go to for dinner – she wants you to decide, because she doesn’t want it to be her fault if dinner sucks. She wants you to lead. She wants you to make decisions. She wants you to shoulder the burden, so that if anything catastrophic happens, or fuck, if she just doesn’t enjoy something, it’s your fault instead of hers. If she has to choose which plumber to call and it’s more expensive than the one your neighbor hired, or if she has to decide which of your creditors to pay off in which order, or if she has to decide where to take the kid this weekend and doesn’t have fun – she is crushed under the weight of the responsibility. She can’t blame you when shit goes wrong. But she can blame you for making her responsible.

Women love drama. They would much rather you lead, and have shit go wrong left and right, and have something to complain about to their friends, to yell at you about, to excite them – than to have you hide from your responsibility and make them do your job.