I'm posting my divorce story as a warning to all of you in terrible marriages and on the fence about marriage in general. I'm 29 years old, and I was married only 3 years and have just finalized my divorce. While we were dating I saw many many red flags and had friends and family ( even a random guy at Best buy ) tell me she was a mistake. I ignored it for reasons I still can't understand.

She's bipolar but was on medication when we first got together and was okay for the most part. After we got married the sex almost immediately stopped, she quit working despite my pleas and almost never cleaned anything. I would be gone 5 days a week for work and come home to a mountain of laundry, dirty dishes and God knows what else I had to get clean. She offered nothing as far as help.

On a rare occasion we had sex she got pregnant, shortly afterwards our daughter was born 3lbs 6 ounces at term, and then I found out she is bulimic and purged during her pregnancy. She stayed in the hospital after our daughter got out of the NICU due to lying to the doctors about her issues. She was there 3 months while I had a 4lb baby. I had to take off work to care for on my own. After she came home virtually nothing changed, I still cooked cleaned and took care of our child exclusively.

Absolutely nothing I did was ever good enough and I thought about divorce every single day. I told myself if I just held on until our daughter was older it would be okay.

Well one day things finally hit the fan. I woke up and found her in the living room with her phone unlocked, upon inspection I found out she was having an online relationship with a dude in Canada, and saving nude pictures of her ex. I found text messages that were absolutely horrible about me, and I promptly saved everything and left for work. I got home later and asked her about it, she lied and told me she had no idea what I was talking about. I sent her the information and she immediately jumped me for going through her phone. An argument ensued and I snapped, I took her phone from her took it out of it's case and spiked it into the floor.

Looking back this was my biggest mistake. Never ever let this go this far. What I did was wrong and I truly feel bad for this. Anyway I called the cops I was made to leave and a week later I went back to my home to pick up some stuff. Upon entering the home she immediately took our daughter into the bathroom and called the cops saying I had a gun, my sister was with me I was nothing but cordial. When the cops got there I was ordered on the ground and was informed she had a protective order issued against me which I had not been served. I left shortly after.

I went through months of court in regards to the protective order where I was not allowed to say a word. About 4 months in I lost faith in the justice system and got a lawyer. I was accused of being a drug addict and an alcoholic which I had to prove otherwise by paying out of pocket for a drug and alcohol test.

After thousands of dollars spent and having supervised visitation with my little girl I went to mediation. She wanted 5k in order to drop the protection order. My lawyer expressed this was all about money. She expected me to pay her alimony plus child support so she continue her life. I heard her lawyer tell her she needed to grow up and get a job.

It's over and I'm paying over 700 a month in child support, 500 a month in spousal until the 5k is paid up and still haven't got a chance to see my child. I know my mistakes in this I know what I became. I've tried during the whole period to work on me, go to therapy to resolve my issues and grow as a man. I never want to be in this situation again and I implore all of you to be aware of the red flags, I implore you if you're going to get married do not marry young, but imo do not get married.

Be better than me and I'm sure many of you feel like that could never be you that I was a bad guy for what I did, but as someone without a history of anger issues, no history of violence or anything of the sort, even good guys break. I lost everything I had ever worked for, a career I loved, and have essentially lost my child. Please be better than me, you have a lot to lose.