This was a post from sometime last week about a man who broke down crying telling his girlfriend about a trauma inflicted on him as a boy. Predictably, his girlfriend lost attraction for him and will probably break up with him soon.

It's a manosphere maxim that men should not display to women negative emotions like fear, rage, despair, anxiety, insecurity, or depression. Men should not display indecisiveness, dithering, or confusion. The reason is that women lose attraction for men who do this. Here's what a woman thinks of a man who displays too much negative emotion:

"He's a pussy. He can't handle shit. He's acting like a woman. Shit, he acts like ME when i get all emotional. I don't need that. I need someone who can handle it when I act like that. I need someone who DOES NOT act like that. I'm gone, dude.

When a man displays too much negative emotion, a woman views him as an immature, afraid, insecure boy. One of two things happens: 1) her maternal instincts kick in and she wants to take care of him; or (2) she gets disgusted and views him as effeminate or incompetent. Either way, she will not want to fuck you and will not view you as a man, a sex partner, or sexually attractive.

If you are in emotional pain, you're on your own. You can feel however you want and need to feel. But you can't do it in front of your woman. You do that, she will soon not be your woman anymore. Do not display negative emotions. Do not go into any detail about what you're feeling or what is causing it. Don't ask her for help. She cannot help you. Don't tell her in lots of detail what's going on. She cannot and will not help you. And most certainly don't show anything like this to women you don't know very well, women you're dating casually, or women you're trying to date casually. Show them nothing. Tell them absolutely nothing.

Women can get help. Women can tell others about their emotional pain, and get help and understanding. Men cannot. Women can vomitpuke their emotional pain all over whoever is nearby and the entire world rushes to help them. Men cannot.

Men carry burdens that women never have to carry. One of those burdens is the burden of performance -a burden from which you are never relieved until the day you're put in the ground. The burden of performance means no one gives a shit that you've been knocked down or are in pain. You have to take care of it yourself. You most certainly won't get help even from your own woman, much less other women. Sorry-not sorry. That's just the way it is.

The best most women will be able to do for you is to stand by you, not leave you, and stand back and look the other way while you work through your emotions on your own. The best she can do is to stay with you and not intervene.

If you need help, get a good male therapist (good luck with that) or a trusted male friend. Talk to them about it and figure out strategies to deal with it and get better.

If you must tell her anything, say something like this: "I'll be OK, don't worry about it." And then work on getting OK and not causing worry.

When things are going badly in your life and you're depressed, anxious, afraid, or despairing, you need to identify the issues and take care of them. You have to actively work on getting better. If you're in a relationship, the clock is ticking on it. If your weeks long funk stretches into months or years, your relationship will be in very serious trouble. She does not want to be, cannot be, with an emotionally distracted, disabled, or broken man who can't take care of her. You need to fix it. Alone. Not necessarily for the relationship. But the point is that she cannot and will not help you. So don't ask her to or expect it.

There are exceptions. Your dog dies. Your mother or father die. That's it. And it cannot be overwrought or dramatic. It should not be in public. You will probably not be penalized for temporary negative emotional displays under those circumstances. But those are the only ones.

Also, it will depend on how masculine you are and how attracted your girl is to you. If she's attracted and you're masculine, you can get away with some -- SOME, A FEW -- overwrought exaggerated emotional vomitpukes. But you get only so many of those, and you don't know how many she is willing to let you get away with. So it's better to avoid negative emotional displays altogether.

I am not saying you cannot or should not feel these things. Not at all. You can feel however you need to feel. Every man feels and experiences negative emotions. Every man experiences anxiety. Many men have been temporarily totally disabled by negative emotions. But there is a difference between feeling and experiencing these things internally, and displaying them outwardly to others. Do NOT do the latter. Do the former, and get help with it if you need it. By all means, go in a room alone, close the door, and feel your feelings. Show them to your dog, your trusted male friend, or your Higher Power (whoever you perceive Him to be). Just don't show anyone else.

There was some dispute and debate over these points at the linked post. Some men said they had women who stayed with them through horrible trauma. Some women said they weren't like the woman in the post, and would never break up with a man or lose attraction to him because he was going through trauma or making excessive negative emotional displays. My only response is that there are a few women who seem to be able to withstand this, and that's fine. My strong suspicion is that some of the women were very attracted to their men and the negative displays stopped soon enough to avoid major relationship damage. For me, these do not obviate the general rule that men are not to display negative emotions to women.

Let's be careful out there.