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SirKolbath
[–]I-am-the-lulAll Ass No Stick151 points152 points153 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Possible comebacks:
[–]I-am-the-lulAll Ass No Stick93 points94 points95 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
"If you are a goddess', I guess that makes me an atheist."
[–]siege3429 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🔥
[–]ADrunkCanadian20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That'll get them triggered pretty quick.
[–]CavannahSr. Hamster Analyst10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Probably the most succinct:
[–]AshyBoneVR4Submaster Flex: Hoes can't touch this8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"I'm not strong enough to lift your gunt, you away from your cunt"
[–]DemDelVarth105 points106 points107 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The saddest part is we have come so far gone that i legit cannot tell if this is satire.
[–]ADrunkCanadian15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup.
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks.
Came here to say this.
[–]0signal0Metal AF52 points53 points54 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'd rather jack off.
[–]OverkillengineCasts Pearls to the Swine40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
With sandpaper and rubbing alcohol.
[–]StrongAttitude35 points36 points37 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
What the f**k did I just read?
[–]ADrunkCanadian29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Cancer
[–]RedditFromTheBathtub7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Satire.
[–]TheYekke0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A brilliant troll :-)
[–]ADrunkCanadian31 points32 points33 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Not sure either, according to the text its rape either way?
[–]jonjp80627 points28 points29 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
What in the actual hell. No...no..NO! I should be honered if a BBW wants to sleep with me? I agree it's her choice but anyone can say no to anyone they don't feel like having sex with. If it hurts one person's feelings so be it. Entitlement is way off the charts. Do some women actually think this?
[–]therealpkg4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Hi. Have you met 2018's American land whales? They absolutely believe this.
"A lot of truth is said in jest."
[–]jonjp8061 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It's sad that they think this. I had my share of whales in my day but never because they choose me to have sex with them. I'm all for girls with confidence bit this behavior is gross.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Banging whales is gross..
[–]jonjp8061 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
When you have no self confidence or worth you take what you can get
[–]therealpkg1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Much agreed, it's extremely sad. And I say that as someone who's been at the SMP apex my entire life. The societal decline we've induced is a loss for everyone.
[–]empatheticapathetic24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Why do women think this “shaming/ordering” men into shit works. It’s such a weak tactic.
[–]WiseMonkeyGoodMonkeyOutlaw Evilmonkey12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's like cold calling and email spam. If it didn't continue to get results they wouldn't still be doing it.
[–]tw1nm3t30r20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Sorry I don't fuck hippos.
[–]DeeplyDisturbed1Cougar Chasers MVP21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
RIP The Onion. Reality and satire are now indistinguishable from each other.
[–]DevilsgunSir Chadly Thunderdong18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Feminism IS satire that's been taken way, waaaaaay too seriously for too fucking long.
A properly timed slap on the part of some unknown 1800s chap would probably have prevented all of this shit.
[–]I-am-the-lulAll Ass No Stick2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Satire that has the white-knights' and the state's full backing to enforce it.
[–]DevilsgunSir Chadly Thunderdong3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All true comedy is tragedy at its core
[–]thefilthyhermit10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
What's that thing that women are always saying??? Oh, yes. "Nobody owes you sex!"
[–]SilverGryphonWorking his way to the titty top6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
No means no unless you are a man
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My body my choice?
[–]axlejackson8910 points11 points12 points 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Wait a minute. This post is pretty much saying even if you do not want to have sex you should, because...reasons?! And if you do not, then it is rape? Gtfoh! By all standard definitions, this comment would be endorsing male rape. Funny how the double standard is simply washed away because obviously men are simply OBJECTS to these morons. If some dude said the same thing(which a precious commentor did say to illustrate the ridiculousness of the statement) he would be a rape apologist. Rape is wrong...doen't matter if the person doing the raping is male or female or some other made up gender, no means no. Nobody should feel honored to be a victim of someone elses entitlement. I bet the most of the people who #metoo, would see nothing wrong with this and would probably feel it is justified to believe that it is true. What a world we live in. If I offend you or trigger you, I don't give two shits or half a fuck. The world doesn't care if your feelings are hurt. Fucking, self-pitying cry babies. Grow a pair and earn respect...don't demand it. #sorrynotsorry#naryashittogive#fucktwitter#numbersign.
[–]GrimTracerThaddeus of Zion9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Dude, there are PUBLISHED ARTICLES that state we straight men, ARE WORSE THAN HITLER, because we refuse to have sex with a (M-T-F) "Transgender Girl" - that has a dick. We're bigots because we want a woman with a vagina & uterus. I'm done.
[–]Flam1ng1cecream1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Does that mean gay men are transphobic if they want a partner with a dick?
[–]GrimTracerThaddeus of Zion0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
IF it is (F-T-M) "Transgender Male" (with a pussy) that is hitting on them. BIGOTRY!
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If only most of them at least looked like that silhouette...
[–]ggnightmare6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I enjoy BBW's as much as the next guy but man, this has to be a joke right?😂😂😂😂
[–]where_muh_good_mensSheriff Goodmonkey6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn, I don't think it's satire because the hash tags are serious.
This clearly shows the problem with giving women soapboxes and acting like they are anything but cute sex toys twirling about like a produce display in a grocery store. Some things they are really good at, thinking logically and coming up with persuasive arguments are just not in their wheelhouse. Men will still fuck their gross, cavernous holes, and their EGOs will justify that as anything but they simple physical releif that it is.
[–]sleepyweaselisawakeNeighbor of the Beast5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've never gone on safari, nor am I interested.
[–]apost544 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah that’s rape
[–]worldtraveller2003 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would like to think its satire but you actually get idiots and certain websites saying shit like this.
[–]oh_no_aliens[email protected]3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep, it's satire. Classic satire too.
[–]Pardusco2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yo what the hell did I just read?
[–]omega-falcon2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Luckily for them, I have basically no standards!
[–]Harry_TeakSr. Hamster Analyst2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As far gone as some of these fat fuck Adipositivity Queens are, this most likely is not satire. If it is, it certainly is a fine example of Poe's Law.
[–]daseinMANIFEST2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Go fuck yourself, fatty!
[–]where_muh_good_mensSheriff Goodmonkey1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn, thats hardcore. I like it!
[–]sugarb4by1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
r/fatlogic
[–]JohnnySkidmarx1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I only do humans!
[–]SilverGryphonWorking his way to the titty top1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sorry honey I'm not a real man, ask Chad to fuck you he's the real deal.
[–]ClockworkOrange92618Endorsed1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would flip the script and type out what this would look like if written by a man to women, but realized that it would read as a command to let men rape them.
You can imagine why I don't want that circulating on the internet..
[–]TomahawkSuppositorySurvived the hoe hunger games1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yea I’m going to say thank you but I don’t sleep with fat chicks. But good luck on your search.
"I'm not licensed to operate a fork-lift"
[–]Funcuz1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Bad news plumpers...My body is also beholden to my choices. You can have all the demands you want but since you're asking them of me and I have absolutely no obligation in any context to accede to them, you're shit out of luck. So suck it up and find yourself a nice fat man who actually agrees with you. Or a pervert. Or a goat for all I care.
[–]blickblock10000 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is satire
[–]NomDePlume7250 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Men actually need to he aroused to get and maintain an erection. Guys cant just use a bit of spit and close their eyes and go to their happy place when having sex with someone they aren't attracted to.
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well, yes, but be careful. That’s an actual defense against rape charges that got a female attacker acquitted because her defense attorney successful argued that if the guy didn’t want to fuck, he wouldn’t have had an erection, so it wasn’t rape.
Like the mounds of evidence that women orgasm during rape should be taken to mean it’s “physiological consent.” I wonder if there is a defense attorney willing to try to argue that for a male rapist. “She came twice. Obviously my client was engaged in consensual sex.”
[–]NomDePlume7251 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
But the sex couldnt even start without an erection. Even if she used her mouth to get the guy hard, if the guy isn't attracted to the woman, he wouldn't be able to maintain an erection. A woman can be stimulated against her will with some spit (or lube) and constant friction. Most men are primarily stimulated visually, so if the woman isn't attractive to the man, I don't see how it can happen beyond the attempt.
[–]OnicoBoy940 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It's 100% satire. And bad satire at that. Way too obvious.
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Read some of the stuff at /whiteknights. This won’t be so unbelievable then.
[–]OnicoBoy940 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's fair enough. But this post in particular is 100% bait.
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can get paid for internet karma?
[–]Flam1ng1cecream0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Honestly that last line had me dying of laughter
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Meh, I can always outrun the heffers. I'll pass
[–]harharry0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All hail the mighty altar of the double standard.
Consecrated in incel tears and blessed by jerks.
I worship thee.
[–]Pickled_Wizard0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Definitely satire.
[–]orcscorper-2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Maybe I could tell if this was satire or not, if it had just a bit more JPEG.
That weren't me. I snagged it on imgur.
Wait, I thought he already paid you to OCR the text, reapply the font layer, and crop out the interlaced pixels... or maybe I'm think of my actual job where my customers actually pay me in monetary surplus instead of internet karma, the 2 have basically mended together at this point.
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[–]I-am-the-lulAll Ass No Stick151 points152 points153 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]I-am-the-lulAll Ass No Stick93 points94 points95 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]AshyBoneVR4Submaster Flex: Hoes can't touch this8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]DemDelVarth105 points106 points107 points (3 children) | Copy Link
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[–]0signal0Metal AF52 points53 points54 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]OverkillengineCasts Pearls to the Swine40 points41 points42 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]StrongAttitude35 points36 points37 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]ADrunkCanadian29 points30 points31 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]jonjp80627 points28 points29 points (5 children) | Copy Link
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[–]SilverGryphonWorking his way to the titty top6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]axlejackson8910 points11 points12 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]GrimTracerThaddeus of Zion9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]GrimTracerThaddeus of Zion0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]where_muh_good_mensSheriff Goodmonkey6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Harry_TeakSr. Hamster Analyst2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]where_muh_good_mensSheriff Goodmonkey1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]TomahawkSuppositorySurvived the hoe hunger games1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]NomDePlume7250 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]NomDePlume7251 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]OnicoBoy940 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]OnicoBoy940 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]SirKolbathYeah, yeah. “Mods are incels.”[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]where_muh_good_mensSheriff Goodmonkey1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link