Society these days mistakenly likens the maturity of a woman to be the exact same as that of a man, blissfully ignorant of biological reality. More often than not, you will see this popular myth being reinforced to girls. While this can be observed at various points in their lives, there are some key periods when this can be very blatant. For example, epiphany phase girls who finally want to cash in their chips portray one aspect of this maturity myth as them having finally grown up, matured and wanting to find a guy who is “worthy” of them.
There are a lot of reasons why girls reach their epiphany phase and their party years eventually ends up with their “wising up/ maturing” to seek commitment. Inability to lock down an Alpha Fucks (much less an Alpha Bucks), concern for her status within sisterhood, the need to secure financial stability etc. are all well discussed and explained. While the desire for settling down is usually chalked to her concerns for financial stability, hypergamy or concern for her status within the sisterhood and her concern that if she misses out marriage, she will be relegated to the lower rung of the sisterhood (since it is explained that married women outrank divorced women who outrank never married women), these are not the entire reasons why women hunt for commitment.
While these factors do play a big role, we also need to remember that women ultimately play by the rules of the society they are in, the rules of their biology and how much of their biological imperative is allowed within the context of the rules of the society they live in. Men who excuse shitty behavior of women as being because of their nature often forget the role society plays in emboldening her to feel safe in acting a certain way.
While women might act in a selfish way to maximize their own benefits they are indeed playing by the rules of society and what is allowed within these rules. Consider two different types of girls: the wealthy career girl and a broke single mom. While the case of the single mom who wants to settle down to get financial security seems obvious enough, the case of the career girl needs more explanation. Women live according to a script. Most women deliberately do things that were the domain of men in the olden days. This is done for several reasons. We will get to the reasons after considering what is the script that women usually play by: The current rules of society (for women and men) is that you grow up, become a legal adult when you turn 18, go through your youth gaining experience and maturity, you reach a certain point where you think you can handle married life, settle down and build your own family. As was explained previously, this is just an appropriation of what used to be the general guideline for a life path for men in the old days: You grow up, become an adolescent, get a job/ join military/ become a businessman, get some maturity and then start your own family. A rite of passage to masculinity.
Women, in the olden days, were expected to follow a different path. They were to learn wifely duties, find a guy (that she would feel comfortable submitting to and one that is within her league) and maintain the household. Needless to say, theirs used to be a more passive approach. Women received instruction on all this from older women in their families, who in the case of nuclear families were mothers and grandmothers and in the case of extended families, would comprise of mothers, grandmothers, aunts etc. Nonetheless, these women had themselves done what they were teaching their daughters to do. While the women were instrumental in building a girl into a girl worthy of married life, the role of the father was to help vet and screen young men wanting to marry their daughters.
With the advent of gender equality philosophy and the notion that men and women are the same with just different sex organs, we've set the life path of both the genders to be the same. We know that women actually coveted this and willingly spearheaded this via movements like feminism, but for the extent of this post let's just stick with this being made by society as a whole for now.
When men were expected to mature, their maturity was expected to come from hardship, self-improvement and attaining success leading to increased resource acquisition. This actually worked because men are expected to be the providers regardless. This maturation process often happened away from the eyes of women. Various cultures have had rites of passage ceremonies where boys were sent off to the forest for a period of time so that they can learn to survive on their own. While this can be traced back to the roots of every society, as society progresses, young men usually went through their rites of passage amidst other men: mentors who consisted of older men, brothers, fathers, uncles, family friends and colleagues.
These days, when women are expected to go through the process of maturity, they are expected to date around, define their taste by trial and error, get some maturity based on their experiences and then settle to build a family. Women, being sexual creatures (in that, that is their primary worth), define their entire process of maturity through fucking. This is true for the majority of women. Seen through this lens, a girl who goes through a series of short term relationships is not much different from a girl who goes through a series of one night stands before deciding to settle down. The minority that tries to follow the traditional male maturity process of power and resource acquisition, ends up becoming masculine and can only attract feminine men. This is the fate of career women.
The reason women usually go through this maturity process is primarily because of two things:
The mistaken belief (solipsism) on women's part that men are also attracted to traits that women are attracted to. While she thinks a masculine man would appreciate a woman who is tough and who went through the male maturity process, what she does not understand is that this only applies amongst men.
While every woman wants to fulfill her hypergamous objective of getting a higher value guy than herself, feminism has made it uncool to be submissive to men or to do anything pleasing to any man. The outlined maturation process serves as an act of defiance to her patriarchy defined rules to femininity. Women use this maturation process to try to prove to themselves and to men that they're as capable as men before finally settling down to be a wife. This entire process is a rebellion against being completely feminine or even desirably feminine. It's a statement of, "I can do man stuff too. Now that I've used my youth to do man stuff, which I expect impressed you, I want your respect (not as a woman but as one of your equals: a man) and I want a better contract than what I would have gotten under the oppressive patriarchy."
If you look at the ages at which Americans got married (first marriage) even four decades ago, it was around the age of 25 for the guy and 22 for the girl. These days, it's around 30 for the guys and 28 for the girls. These days, the age at which girls even start to think about locking down someone with economic potential is around 25, which if you notice is the age at which men used to get married. This is primarily because of the feminist message that women are at their peak in their thirties, but this is not possible without the acceptance for the maturation process she's supposed to go through before settling down.
When women get to the end of their maturation process, which is conveniently right after their party years, they frantically start looking to settle down not because of other women alone, but because everyone around her expects her to have become mature and capable of settling down. This is usually when friends and family members who dismissed her party years as her finding herself will start openly asking questions like when will she finally act like an adult and settle down. Girls go for betas around this time not just to extract resources but also to win social points. A beta serves the exact same purpose as that of a trophy wife. He is there to make her look good in society's eyes. She does not love him or care about his wellbeing. He is merely there to protect her and serve as a consolation prize. He is proof that she did mature and finally did become an adult. And if it does not work out, it was because he was not mature enough to make it work. It was by no fault of hers. After all, after having "made mistakes" and "maturing" because of that, she did become an adult. He just wasn't mature enough.
PS:
If she is not successful in her attempts to secure commitment, she will rationalize her maturity process to be one where she has discovered inner peace after having finally figured out that she's the prize. A good example: http://archive.is/6cbwo
Source for marriage age data here. https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2018/11/15/2018-median-age-of-marriage/ https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2018/08/24/us-marital-status-data-through-2017/
See my comment here for a great example of how women go through life as outlined here.
See here for more on the internal script women go through in their party years.
[–]ValhallaWillCome27 points28 points29 points (9 children) | Copy Link
The social implications of this is basically that it has become impossible to treat women as women. Where we used to be able to pretty much keep a family alive on one paycheck, we now need both to work for a paycheck in order to pay for a decent lifestyle. The supply of workers has nearly doubled, so the percieved value of work has gone done with the wages. Even if a woman has decided she wants to be a housewife and mother, most of the time she simply can’t because there are not enough men with the potential of earning a bigger paycheck to support that.
The second problem with women ‘maturing’ through sleeping around is rooted in female biology. If they feel loved by a partner they get a boost in I believe endorfins (I have a research paper somewhere on this, I’d have to look it up) in their blood. They get the same release from sex, which is the reason it is hard for them to seperate an FWB situation/ sleeping around with actual love. Once they’re in a relationship and they hit a bump in the road that makes her feel unloved, she’ll try to fix that by cheating on her partner, just to get that feeling back. This is why it is so important for a potential wife to not have slept around.
The simple problem with feminism is that it hasn’t given women the choice of becoming independant or becoming a housewife, it has simply forced them into the workforce with no easy way out. On top of that, your observation of them having the wrong perception of a relation, career and a family is absolutely correct. They project what they find attractive in a man as what a man looks for in a women and it causes a giant mismatch in any type of relation between a man and a woman.
Simply put, feminism has dug a grave for females and somehow they managed to mostly blame men for it.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 18 points19 points20 points (7 children) | Copy Link
Women don't want to be treated like women anymore. The best lies are the ones with a hint of truth in it.
[–]ValhallaWillCome10 points11 points12 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I always wondered if they truly don’t want to be treated like women, or simply say so. Hypergamy simply states she’ll have to find somebody better than her and keep him around. You can’t do that and expect the man to see you as an equal in everything.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 13 points14 points15 points (1 child) | Copy Link
We have to look at this from the viewpoint of submission and women's unwillingness to submit to men these days. Feminism promoted women to rebel against their own biology. The very act of sex for a woman is submission. Unless she is using a strap on, she is getting fucked. Hypergamy necessitates a woman to find a better man and to keep him around. This is usually done through submission. Women's unwillingness to submit to men completely these days could be the very reason women go through several men rather than dedicating herself to one guy. But this does create a conundrum for women. They need to submit but they just don't allow themselves to. This, I think, explains the rise in bdsm and the 50 shades of grey phenomenon. Feminism is ok with women using sex as a means for submission. But they want it to be in the woman's terms. As you mentioned, sex is being used as an outlet to satisfy women's psychological needs these days. A loving relationship is being substituted with a never ending chase for hypergamy. Hypergamy in the old days was a step up. These days, it's a ladder. And women want to keep going up and up until they reach the very best. I touched on this in this post when I explained the concept of alpha bucks.
[–]Enchanted_XRay5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I am a woman posting here and it's true. My childhood friend called me about a year ago, she married a guy whose family has done well she has three healthy children lives in a home that is paid off, her parents down the street as babysitters, very nice area water front prop in the Pacific North West, multiple cars, her husband has sacrificed and he's a good guy. They did the whole on and off again thing but eventually got in their ebb and flow. She is always curious about my life as a Sigma female, I don't talk about my life and my relationship with my man is about respect for him and submission to him and him alone. I'm just so over it listening to the excuses. I'm grateful for what I've got. But when my friend called me one time asking me to validate her feelings that he's pathetic and it's just not enough. I told her as gently as I could I didn't agree and I felt she has a really good life and I'd be careful not to take that for granite. She really wanted to put her husband down and justify a divorce. Because I wouldn't put this guy down, she just shut down and threw a tantrum with me on phone. I see her social media it's a giant Bailout Advertisement, I really don't want to contribute to the bad behavior and so I didn't.
[–]Chairman_Ellen_PaoPuts extra mayo on his roast beef tacos6 points7 points8 points (3 children) | Copy Link
I am keenly aware of this and respect it. That's why I don't hold doors for them anymore.
[–]BlogginginvicecitySr. Hamster Analyst9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Watch out, you'll feed their kinky desire to be dominated! Or was that your plan all along 🤔.
Women being nasty is the ultimate shit test. We give them pussy passes and they only get nastier and nastier. Now they legally have more rights and privileges than men, and little cultural restraint. It's funny that after women gaining all these rights and privileges, a man has to be borderline abusive to impress her. Kind of like how a spoiled teen soon is only impressed by Fentanyl and brushes with death. Women, teenagers, humans, we all want to test the limits of the rules.
It's all a shit test. Men and women as aren't putting young women in their place, so they have little incentive to not be nasty until it's too late.
The following online memetic behavior is a reflection of society. A woman goes online for advice on how to better their prospects for a partner, and commenters spoil her and put less responsibility on her shoulders. Men go online, and everyone says, "improve yourself. What are you doing to make yourself a catch?"
Our tendency to spoil women --give them a pussy pass-- hurts women and men. It's what's destroying the social contract in civilization!:
Women as a whole are supposed to give men a reason to build and contribute to society via monogamy. In other words, they are to control the access to sex for the betterment of society. Thus women generally acting loose was seen as a threat to the fabric of society.
Men on the other hand are to control access to resources/commitment/pussy-passes. This is to give women incentive to contribute and build within monogamy, which in turn incentivizes men to contribute to society. We as a society have fucked this up, and women know they can act like vicious tramps and get away with it, even if only through daddy government.
Giving women pussy passes is the first step in the unravelling of society's fabric. If men are giving women resources for nothing, women have little incentive to respect one man and work for it. In turn, men as a whole are generally seeing little incentive to contribute to women or society. Ultimately, the hurt starts from our instinct --men's instinct to give the pussy pass.
As a man, to hold your pussy passes tight and close is not misogyny, it's sustainable.
Relating to what you were saying, women used to generally at least offer pleasantries if you held the door open for them, but now they might see you as one of those weak, thirsty men if you do. I'd much rather open the door for a man that does not expect me to.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I touched on this in a comment below. While women are generally not expected to act responsible in any way, men are expected to take on more responsibility and to perform even better to get some sub-standard pussy. You can't get a girl who is worth a shit to build a relationship with anymore but you can pump and dump a hundred sluts. How is that going to help build society in a constructive way? It's true that the line of thinking, even in the manosphere, is just a product of its time. But this won't change anything.
Women are the gate keepers of sex. Men are the gate keepers of relationships. The first is gone. The second is starting to go. It's going to be interesting to see what the ensuing chaos will bring about.
[–]andrewcrosby080 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
”””Men are gatekeepers of relationships””” Yeesh how true this is!
[–]IMNOTDEFENSIVE0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
As a feminist, I actually somewhat agree with your statement. I've always wanted to be a housewife but I just dont feel secure doing that. I'm expected to go to college and find a job, but that wont give me the time I want to spend with my family.
As much as I dont believe that only giving women one choice (working) is not the intention of most feminists, I would agree that it did limit my opportunity to be a mother.
I understand that the intentions behind it aren't bad though, it expands my options in all but one direction. So I really should be grateful, but I want to be a mother so much more than anything else. It is best, however, that I work to give my future kids the life they deserve I suppose.
[–]anyoneinamerica6 points7 points8 points (11 children) | Copy Link
Insightful OP. Thanks for your work in putting this together. I agree with your line of thought.
I would also consider expanding on some aspects a little bit, but i lack the ability to clearly write my ideas in a cohesive manner. Therefore, i will just offer up this concept an maybe someone more talented than I can do something with it:
People are influenced all the time. However women, being more 'socially inclined' are influenced more often and easier than the typical mature man. You mentioned the sisterhood, but i would expand that sisterhood to include all media outlets (books, movies, tv, news, internet, etc.) I would stipulate that the content of these media outlets, such as:
rom-com movies, strong independent woman movies, soap operas, sitcoms, reality shows, instant gratification (instagram), facebook, dating apps, etc. et. al.
have done more to damage relationships, negatively influence women, and both encourage and support erratic and violent behaviors in women than any pussy hat march, documentary, or female political candidates could ever hope to.
The current state of the female population is mob rules. They will do what they want and when they want because there are no social constraints hindering those actions. Additionally, there are fewer and fewer legal repercussions for their behaviors since they continue to receive a pussy pass at every turn.
In short, at every outlet they are encouraged to be vile and every avenue for correction has been deleted. The absence of consequences has allowed them to run free like wild animals.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 6 points7 points8 points (6 children) | Copy Link
I'm attaching the link to one of my favorite posts. I agree with Dalrock. Women are not being educated to act vile. They act vile because there are no restrictions on their behavior. Women of character are not born, they are made.
Manosphere these days usually condones shitty female behavior with the excuse that it's just her nature. While you cannot change your nature, you can learn to control it. In fact, civilization is built on your tendency to control your natural impulses. The reason you see women being shitty these days is that they have no reason to control their behavior.
https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2011/03/21/raising-feral-females/
[–]coagulated_cumquatsJr. Hamster Analyst6 points7 points8 points (3 children) | Copy Link
It's important to note that this article was pre-tinder also, which effectively removed any last remaining societal restrictions on females base hypergamous instincts, regardless of how they looked.
One of the commenters makes an important point -
Tinder and OLD have effectively removed (1) and the decline of religion and the family unit including a father has removed (2). There are no longer any restrictions in place for women's base nature
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 10 points11 points12 points (2 children) | Copy Link
There's a popular trp saying that your woman is only as shitty as you let her be. That is true for society in general too. You tend to get more of what you promote. If you promote chastity and sexual purity, you will get women who are worthy of marriage. If you promote sexuality, you will get sluts who are only good for sex and not much else. Thanks to OLD and rampant girl power sex positive propaganda, we are seeing a lot of sluts. Thanks to manosphere movements like trp and mgtow, we are seeing men beginning to withdraw any kind of commitment. The future is bleak, especially for women as men tend to fare better in the face of loneliness. It's going to be interesting to see how the tinder generation girls age. Thanks to the internet we will have a great way to chronicle their pathetic lives too.
[–]BewareTheOldManEndorsed4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Succinct, yet profound words seemingly missed or blatantly ignored by lots of women. How are you (in your mind) worthy of marriage after freely and cheaply whoring yourself out to dozens of men for over a decade and during your prime years? HOW!!!??
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Because women have been sold (and want to believe) that going the same path as that of a man is the correct thing for them to do because of gender equality phenomenon. Additionally, they think proving themselves equal to men will get them a better deal than what they would otherwise get. Women do not understand that behaving like men will lose prospects and ultimately devalue their worth. Opposites attract. This slips past their minds because of solipsism.
[–]anyoneinamerica2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks for the link. It was informative.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
My pleasure.
[–]BewareTheOldManEndorsed6 points7 points8 points (3 children) | Copy Link
This is just ONE of the problems...the selfishness. Meanwhile - these women are banged-out, passed-around, used-up, and fully expect men to be unselfish and sacrificing after being presented with a shitty end-product of a worn-out woman who can love him no more than the last guy who tossed her aside like a used dishrag. HE - the guy is supposed to just accept this trash. The insult is that no one is telling women to accept loser and trash men.
If these are society's "new rules" for women in the millilumen, my advice to all young men is to place scrutiny, judgment, and strict requirements on women that allow NO COMPROMISE for slut behavior. This is unacceptable. Smart and high-value men make it very clear they REFUSE society's rules. The used-up sluts are for losers and desperate Beta-Provider chumps who can't do any better than a woman who passed herself around to dozens of men in support of so-called "maturity."
[–]j_arbuckle20126 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
The problem is, by expressing all that you are signalling clearly to her exactly how to lie to you.
Females lie. That is an immutable fact of life. The best way is to cast a wide net and be non-judgemental. When confronted with non-judgement women will confess to drowning babies with smiles on their faces. Now you have all the info you need to make a decision.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I agree. Girls know exactly what to say to make you think that they're exactly what you're looking for. But I don't think he's telling guys to outwardly express it. Keep that to yourself as your standard and if any girl does not meet those standards, be very nonchalant and non-judgmental about it and pump & dump her. She doesn't deserve anything else.
[–]BewareTheOldManEndorsed4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
There's no need to openly direct and detail a man's personal and strict standards to women. @ u/j_arbuckle2012 is correct - women simply lie and adjust their behavior to fit the man's preferences. My basic recommendation to young men is ALWAYS go with younger women as they're likely much less damaged and might be salvageable, be the masculine man that women want (in reality) versus the crying, weeping, soy-boy that so many women "claim" they want as life-mates/husbands.
I've seen women attempt to represent a personality OTHER than their true selves and it takes a while for them to crack, but they ALWAYS crack under stress of real-life. True sluts can't outrun their past and it's virtually impossible to hide slut behavior.
The few who actually hold the lie and end up with an unsuspecting husband who had no idea his "innocent" wife is a slut usually discovers either on his own or via some third-party, who eventually divulges the information. After that...everything generally falls apart. The subreddit r-relationships is awash with examples of women who failed at hiding their sordid past.
It's amazing how many women have the idea that getting rammed and tossed aside by dozens of men is "freeing and sexually liberating." It's as if they have no concept that men don't wish to marry sloots.
[–]TomahawkSuppositorySurvived the hoe hunger games2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Women in particular single mothers will equate a man not stepping up and taking care of her and her bastard child as a man not being a man. While responsibility is important as a man I believe in intelligent choices to responsibility. For example, if I choose to pursue a masters degree then it is my responsibility to pay for it so that I don’t incur student loan debt and actually manage my life so that I can study. Same way if I choose to date or enter into a relationship there are degrees of responsibility. Not assuming more responsibility than you need to isn’t being unmanly, it’s being smart. After all why should any man step up and assume the responsibility of some other mans child?
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
You're looking at life from a quality of life perspective. Sluts look at life from a quantity of life perspective. For them, more the merrier. That goes for her dick count and the size of your responsibility.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This right here is perhaps the ultimate difference between men and women from a societal perspective. Women only play in the rules of society (with very rare exceptions). Men push the boundaries of society, which is what has resulted in social evolution throughout human existence. This same basic nature is present in every aspect of women and men. For example, women sat around being pampered to the best of man's ability while man was walking on the moon. Again, there are a few rare exceptions, but exceptions are exactly that: exceptions.
By the way, has anyone else found it amusing that "exceptional" women are only those who are comparable to men in general? Like, comparable to a random Joe. Exceptional men, however, are like Albert Einstein and General Patton and Alexander the Great and Leonidas and Sir Isaac Newton, and George Washington, and Eric the Red.